close up on rain drops on a window, My Forever Son
When Grief Comes to Stay, My Forever Son

When you lose your child, 
there is nothingness, 
the descent into the abyss 
of losing not just your child, 
but also yourself

Beth, Dylan’s Mom, My Forever Son

Grief is Unfinished

Others can come alongside us for awhile, but our journey into the deep, dark night must be our own. Here, we rally against the darkness, awaken our soul’s deep slumber of the “normalcy” of everyday life, and do fierce battle with an enemy unseen. Grief torments, ruminates, is recursive and in the end, in my losing my son to suicide, unfinished.

My son is a warrior son, and I, by default and through journeying my soul’s dark night in grieving losing Dylan to suicide, am a warrior mama. I live that my son lives too.

One day, there will be reconciling and resolution, but it is I who must learn to walk unfinished here, finding, once again, love, meaning, and purpose in the walking out of my life’s journey.

Walking with Grief

I walk with grief. I carry the weight of bearing deep sorrow in my soul. I am a survivor of suicide loss. No matter how “good” things get, no matter the profundity of my joy and happiness here-as is, as now, I will always be tinged and laced with the bittersweet. 

But Grief is a Walk alone photo of woman from behind walking down long road.
But Grief is a Walk Alone, My Forever Son

I’m missing you
I’m missing you
I’m missing you
I’m missing you…

Daddy Cat, a large tabby cat, photographed in snow, My Forever Son
Daddy Cat in Snow, My Forever Son

If you could have just held onto hope, Dylan–

sigh. . .


Recent Posts

Index: My Forever Son

Index: My Forever Son This index provides a well-structured and user-friendly way to navigate through the content in the My Forever Son blog. Think of it as a helpful guide, carefully organizing the content into headings, subheadings, keywords, and brief descriptions. With this index, you can quickly and efficiently find exactly what you’re looking for.…

Continue Reading


Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

Red Rose in June

Get new posts delivered to your inbox.

Leave a Reply