My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After Suicide Loss

Suicide Grief: Prolonged Grief Disorder?

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 3, 2023
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Red Nasturtium on Stone Ledge, My Forever Son

Suicide Grief: Prolonged Grief Disorder? Suicide [grief] can be complicated by feelings of guilt, shame, responsibility, rejection, and stigmatization. National Library of Medicine, Grief interventions for people bereaved by suicide: A systematic review What Is Prolonged Grief Disorder? Known as complicated grief until 2022, the DSM-5 now defines complicated grief as Prolonged Grief Disorder. The […]

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I Will Love You Forever Mom

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 20, 2023
3 Comments on I Will Love You Forever Mom

I Will Love You Forever Mom

I’ll Love You Forever Mom “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living my baby you’ll be.” Robert Munsch, Love Your Forever Three Years Out After Losing Dylan Originally Published 2016 I Will Love You Forever Mom Memorial Dates It has been 3 years of acute agony, pain, and […]

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A Poem About Losing a Child: If Earth Were Sky and Sky Above

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 20, 2023
2 Comments on A Poem About Losing a Child: If Earth Were Sky and Sky Above

If Earth Were Sky and Sky Above, My Forever Son

A Poem About Losing a Child: If Earth Were Sky and Sky Above If earth were sky and sky above Then heart could hold this ache of love, Suspended, like rain, in clouds wanting to fall, But bound to sun’s joy because heart touches all. I fall ‘ere so slowly most cannot yet tell My […]

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As I Tuck You In: A Song About Child Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 20, 2023
16 Comments on As I Tuck You In: A Song About Child Loss

Handwritten Lyrics to "As I Tuck You In," My Forever Son

As I Tuck You In: A Lullaby for the Child I Lost Lyrics for the Song: As I Tuck You In As I Tuck You In As I tuck you in, I lay me downAs I hold you now, I lift my armsAs I fall asleep, I pray for youMy child, my love, my heart, […]

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Find Hope Here: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 17, 2023
1 Comment on Find Hope Here: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

Lilac in Afternoon Shade

Find Hope Here: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide A Lullaby for My Son: As I Tuck You In Get the Book

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The Holidays Descend: Suicide Never Ends

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 12, 2023
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Glistening Snow in Tree Shadows, My Forever Son

The Holidays Descend: Suicide Never Ends And so it is I checked out last night, hoisted the white flag, decided the last thing I could really do is hole up and write, knowing I needed to walk but not having the wherewithal to walk here at home on my treadmill. So off I went to […]

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Quiet Tears at 3 Years

Red Tulip in Spring, My Forever Son

Quiet Tears at 3 Years Your beat of heart hersNow her own to live on,Sick pulse of acheholding death in her arms. Beth Brown, My Forever Son, If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You 3 Years of Infinite Tears You are a “survivor of suicide,” and as that unwelcomedesignation implies, your survival—your emotionalsurvival—will […]

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Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 2, 2023
4 Comments on Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Red Rose in June, My Forever Son

Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide Beat Still My Heart Beat still my heart, Beat still my mind, Weary though thou art, Carry his love along with thine, Though heavy on thy shoulders Crost fields throughout all time. In the deepest dark of the bleakest night, If light there […]

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Living Backwards Going Forward-Year 3

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 28, 2023
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Peach Iris in Bloom, A Sense of the Surreal, My Forever Son

Living Backwards Going Forward-Year 3 Living Backwards: A Sense of the Surreal Living Backwards Going Forward means that in the strangest of ways, it is always, for me, June 25th, 2012. Or some time before that. All the way back to March 1992 and up to June 2012. I suppose to some effect, my […]

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Carrying Ache and Love in Suicide Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 23, 2023
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Peach Flowering Quince in Bloom, My Forever Son

Carrying Ache and Love in Suicide Loss Now, after all this time, Ache and Love walk together in my heart. Holding hands, one is never without the other, but ache and love have carried me—and carry me still. Beth Brown, My Forever Son Carrying Ache My life both imploded and exploded the day Dylan died. […]

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You’re Free Now Child: A Song About Child Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 8, 2023
5 Comments on You’re Free Now Child: A Song About Child Loss

12-String Epiphone Acoustic Guitar, My Forever Son

You’re Free Now Child: A Song About Child Loss Songs for Child Loss I write poems and songs about child loss because I lost my only son. If you’ve lost a child, then you know the acute pain of grieving your child. It’s impossible, it’s ongoing, and it’s soul searching. I am always thinking about […]

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Songs for Child Loss

Black Pear-Burst Fender Electric Guitar, My Forever Son

Songs for Child Loss I write poems and songs about child loss because I lost my only son. If you’ve lost a child, then you know the acute pain of grieving your child. It’s impossible, it’s ongoing, and it’s soul searching. I am always thinking about my son, loving and missing him, what could have, […]

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5 Years, Infinite Tears

Daffodils in Early Spring

5 Years, Infinite Tears Losing Dylan has changed everything. Yes, I am to the point of feeling the highs of life again, though never so sweetly as to silence the ache of my heart that beats still for my son. Beth Brown, My Forever Son, 5 Years, Infinite Tears 5 Years, Infinite Tears This dark, […]

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I Want to Believe

Lion Statue on Brick Steps with a few scattered red leaves in fall, My Forever Son

I Want to Believe I want to believe–that with enough love and laughter, books and reading, friends and family, children grow up to be happy I want to believe–the stage is set early for dreams to come true: Skies dazzle in brilliant blue, clouds drift idly, stretches of pastures and woodlands lend serenity I want […]

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Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 5, 2023
No Comments on Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Peach Daylily in Summer, My Forever Son

Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss Reflections on Hope After Loss Matins (by John O’Donohue) Morning Prayer 1 Somewhere, out at the edges, the night is turning and the waves of darkness Begin to brighten on the shore of dawn. The heavy dark falls back to earth And the freed air goes wild with light, […]

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Rain Comes to Heal Us All: A Poem of Love and Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 5, 2023
1 Comment on Rain Comes to Heal Us All: A Poem of Love and Loss

After the Rain

Rain Comes to Heal Us All: A Poem of Love and Loss Rain Comes to Heal Us All Rain comes to heal us all, Falling tears from a sky of love, Remembering even when earth forgets To nurture all that we cannot forgive, Bringing love remembered to restore Even flowers that forget how to bloom […]

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"Why?" Child Loss to Suicide Coping with Suicide Loss Depression and Mental Illness Hope and Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss Stigma and Awareness Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

“When Someone is Too Bruised to Be Touched”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 3, 2023
13 Comments on “When Someone is Too Bruised to Be Touched”

Seedum and Yucca in Fall, My Forever Son

“When Someone is Too Bruised to Be Touched” A Split Second without a Second Chance A tick on a clock. A split second without a second chance. A momentary collapse into utter despair and hopelessness. A fleeting glimpse of a life once-lived not enough to sustain. A single click on a school’s classroom clock, half […]

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"Why?" Child Loss to Suicide Coping with suicide Coping with Suicide Loss Family loss Grief Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Poems Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide Poems about Loss Reflections after Suicide Loss Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 2, 2023
No Comments on Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide

Living in the Glare of my son’s suicide Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide His narrative just started. Only a few chapters in. A promising start. Having left so much unsaid, unwritten. His chasm, your darkness. His absence, dark ache your heart. Beth Brown, Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide Listen […]

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I Will Seek Until I Find You-A Poem About Losing a Child

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 2, 2023
5 Comments on I Will Seek Until I Find You-A Poem About Losing a Child

Red Rose in June, My Forever Son

I Will Seek Until I Find You: A Poem About Losing a Child I Will Seek Until I Find You And where will you run when arms reach (but you’re not mine) When I can feel still so strongly (holding you still in my arms) From here frantic I search wildly (but cannot ever now […]

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Child Loss to Suicide Coping with Suicide Loss Grief Hope and Healing Memorial Dates Memories and Stories Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss Suicide loss

Year 8 Memorial Date

Red, White, and Purple Petunias, My Forever Son

Year 8 Memorial Date To those of you that still feel you aren’t even sure you want to be here and you can’t imagine ever being happy again. The pain does change, it softens. You will want to live again and be able to enjoylife again. It will never be like before but the crushing, […]

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