Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”

Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem, “He Left Too Soon”

Summary

Beth Brown’s poignant poem, “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere -Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon,” skillfully intertwines the sorrow stemming from the loss of her son to suicide with the tumult wrought by a powerful Derecho storm that occurred on the day of his funeral. Included in her publication, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide, the poem that was inspired by the Derecho, “He Left Too Soon,” explores the profound grief and emotional turmoil she experienced. Through her eloquent writing, Brown aspires to offer solace to those enduring similar tragedies, thereby shedding light on the fragility of life and the enduring strength of love amidst sorrow.

Introduction

A Note from the Author

“Derecho–A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon” features “He Left Too Soon,” a heartfelt poem, alongside the poignant story that inspired it, that reflects the deep and abiding sorrow of losing my beloved son to suicide during an unexpected storm known as Derecho.

Experiencing the loss of a child to suicide feels like a storm out of nowhere

Experiencing the loss of a child to suicide feels like a storm out of nowhere, both in a metaphorical sense and, for me, quite literally, as Derecho swept through on the very day of my son’s funeral, shrouding the moment in a chaotic blend of grief and nature’s fury. The ominous winds mirrored my inner turmoil, encapsulating a heartbreak that was overwhelming and profound.

Included in this post, “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere,” is the definition and explanation of Derecho to give the poem further context and resonance, allowing readers to grasp not just the tumultuous weather, but also the emotional tempest that accompanies such a tragic loss.

I’ve included the definition and explanation of Derecho to give the poem further context and resonance, allowing readers to grasp not just the tumultuous weather, but also the emotional tempest that accompanies such a tragic loss. “He Left Too Soon” is ultimately the name of the poem I wrote that day of my son’s funeral, but I also think of the poem as “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere.”

This piece is part of a small collection of poems for grief and healing available in the post on My Forever Son blog titled Find Hope Here: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide.

“Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere-A Poem on Loss,” along with other meaningful works by the author, is included in Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide available on Amazon Kindle. This collection of poems offers comfort to those facing similar struggles, reminding us of life’s fragility and the hope that can appear even in our toughest times.

Related Reads

• “He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
• Why Suicides Spike in Spring and Summer
• “When Someone Takes His Own Life”-Depression and Suicide
• Navigating Grief on Memorial Dates: A Personal Journey
• A Deluge of Feelings: Year 8 Memorial Date

My Forever Son

My Forever Son explores the profound grief, hope, and healing that follow the tragedy of losing a child to suicide.

My Forever Son dovetails the author’s journey of descending into deep grief, searching for hope, and finding healing along the way.

Table of Contents

The Chaos of Grief

“He Left Too Soon”: The Storm Descends

Funeral for My Son

June 29, 2012–Funeral for my son. 101 degrees dropping to 73 degrees in a matter of minutes. Whirling wind. Gusts of whipping wind. Snapping wind. Dark skies. Clotted clouds. Midday sun going away–suddenly. A piercing dark. A turbulent sky. Trying to get to the car before the rains came. Things blowing. Paper across parking lots. Light going out. Light extinguished. He Left Too Soon.

Derecho–A Storm Out of Nowhere: Darkness on the wings of violent winds. 60-80 m.p.h. Trees cracking. Branches breaking. Traffic lights swaying to and fro. As if in a dream I couldn’t break. A nightmare I’d have to live out the rest of my life.

June 29, 2012–My son’s funeral was on a day heaving itself pell-mell, uprooting itself, shaking loose all grounding, breaking all that held it dear, all that called it life, all that depended upon it to be as it had always been.

A day rupturing earth in a storm violent and of epic proportion. Derecho. Unpredictable. Violent. Sudden. Never knowing we were in the path of such a storm. Having never seen let alone been through a storm capable of damaging this much to so many.

The Noise of The Wind. As If It Were Screaming.

The noise of the wind. As if it were screaming. Over and over, rising and hissing, falling and rising, screaming and moaning, cracking and casting itself broken. Falling down. Tumbling down. The sudden downing of it all. Power down. Wires down. Caught in the catastrophic exhale of sky, earth, trees, and now, even light extinguished.

Derecho–A Storm Out of Nowhere. Bringing It All Down. Breaking Things. Destructive nightmare of high, flat winds. A Dark Sky. A Dark Day. That week you took your life. That week you took me with you.

A Poem Borne From the Historic Derecho, June 29, 2012: “He Left Too Soon”

He Left Too Soon 

He left too soon,
Lifting life from June,
Casting torrents of rain.
 
His absence,
Breath of pain whose exhale can only bring
Heart heaving, this heavy beating of tears.

Breaking loose,
All hell in earth's upturned rupture, 
Death shoveling shadows over me.

As I bend to lay flowers on his name,
Inscribed and bronzed, 
A permanence come to stay.
 
My love laced now with pain,
Standing over my son's grave,
Death's Derecho come to stay in my shadow.

©Beth Brown, 2021, "He Left Too Soon"

"He Left Too Soon" is a poem inspired by the rare Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere on the day of his funeral.

What is a Derecho?

Derecho is derived from the Spanish adjective for “straight” or “direct.” A Derecho is a fast-moving (60-80 mph winds) storm seeming to come out of nowhere. A violent storm bent on destruction, a Derecho is a

(Derecho is a) widespread, long-lived, straight-line wind storm that is associated with a fast-moving group of severe thunderstorms. . . Derechos can cause hurricane-force winds, tornadoes, heavy rains, and flash floods.

Chicago Tribune, By Russ Schumacher, The Conversation
Associated Press

The Historic Derecho of June 29, 2012

On June 29, 2012, a devastating line of thunderstorms known as a Derecho (deh REY cho) moved east-southeast at 60 miles per hour (mph) from Indiana in the early afternoon to the Mid-Atlantic region around midnight. The states most significantly impacted were Indiana, Ohio, Kentucky, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Maryland, Virginia, Delaware, New Jersey, and North Carolina, as well as Washington, D.C. Nearly every county impacted by this convective system suffered damages and power outages.

Winds were commonly above 60 mph with numerous reports of winds exceeding 80 mph. Some areas reported isolated pockets of winds greater than 100 mph. The storm resulted in 13 deaths, mainly a result of falling trees. One major impact from the derecho was widespread power outages. More than 4 million customers were without power, some for more than a week after the storms moved through. To make matters worse, the area affected was in the midst of a prolonged heat wave.

The Historic Derecho of June 29, 2012
The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s National Weather Service

Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere: “He Left Too Soon”

One of the earliest poems I ever wrote about the great gulf of sorrow that swept over me when I lost my son Dylan to suicide was “He Left Too Soon,” a poem borne of the Derecho, a storm out of nowhere, on the day of my son’s funeral. My heart wept (it still does, though I’ve learned to carry love and ache together). Who I was fled my existence. My career. My teaching. My art. My music. My voice. My writing.

A great and terrible silence 

A great and terrible silence came over me. I couldn’t speak more than a few words. I was lost in the rush and consumption of shock and grief. I wrote a few words as a note on my phone, about seeing my son laid out in a coffin, about how that day was the second worst day of my life. But it’s as though someone else was writing the words. I couldn’t find me, my words, my reflections, in my writing. It would be months before I could.

That profound grief, the spilling over of all I held precious and dear, the endless tears I wept, the way all of me went away the day my son died, sought expression in a way that had always reached into my deepest feelings. 

Lifting Life from June

“He left too soon, lifting life from June” began so small, yet slowly took shape as the poem it is today. My first season of grief, summer and my son’s memorial date, expressed in poetic language. My deepest sorrow laid bare in the starkness of language befitting of grief. 

“He Left Too Soon” is cloaked in language that was once foreign to me. Words drenched in loss and ache. Words belonging to cemeteries and the burying of the dead. Words that express only pain and hurt. Words that state bluntly the finality of life. I have known sadness my entire life, but I didn’t know how heavy grief feels. How losing a child can pull breath and life from you. How grief lives everywhere inside you when you lose a child to suicide.

Casting Torrents of Tears

The wallop of grief, the distortion of time and place, the feelings of shock and horror, the feeling of disbelief and the hideous reality of my son’s suicide. It is the first time I would write about losing my son, but it is not the last. 

I had so few words. For one who’s read so much, I could find only the solemnity of language. A few sparse words that felt as heavy and weighted as the intense pain in my heart. Words of mourning. Echoes of late June when I lost my son. 

Truth in “casting torrents of rain” because we were having drenching rains that week. Poetic because metaphorically, my grief was casting torrents of tears everywhere in my life. 

He Left Too Soon

He left too soon— 
Lifting life from June,
Casting torrents of rain
 
His absence—
Breath of pain whose exhale can only bring
Heart heaving, this beating of tears

Breaking loose—
All hell in earth's upturned rupture, 
Death shoveling shadows over me

As I bend to lay flowers on his name—
Inscribed and bronzed, 
A permanence come to stay
 
My love laced now with pain—
Standing over my son's grave,
Death's Derecho come to stay in my shadow.


©Beth Brown, 2021, "He Left Too Soon," Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere-A Poem on Loss
     

Beth Brown, Author

About the Author

Beth Brown is a writer, educator, and bereaved mother who shares her journey of healing after losing her only son, Dylan, to suicide. Through poetry, essays, and her blog My Forever Son, Beth offers comfort and hope to others navigating grief, honoring the enduring bond between parent and child and celebrating the small joys that illuminate the path toward healing.

Meet the Author: Writing Through the Abyss

by Beth Brown

There are places that cannot be mapped, only entered—terrains of loss where language falters and the heart, stripped of its certainties, must learn to speak again. I am Beth Brown, a mother whose son, Dylan, died by suicide at twenty. My life, once measured by the ordinary rhythms of teaching literature and nurturing a child, was pierced in two: before and after. In the aftermath, I found myself wandering a wilderness where time bent, memory ached, and the world’s colors dimmed to the hush of grief.

On baby’s breath and angel wings,
You bring me love yet still,
— “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”

I did not choose to become a chronicler of sorrow, but grief, relentless and unbidden, pressed its ink into my hands. I wrote because I could not bear the silence. I wrote because the ache demanded witness. In poetry, I found a way to hold both the weight of absence and the persistence of love—a language for the unspeakable, a vessel for memory, a place where my son’s name could still be spoken.

He left too soon,
Lifting life from June,
Casting torrents of rain.
— “He Left Too Soon”

There are nights when the world tilts, and I am returned to the moment of loss, the fracture that remade me. Yet even in the deepest dark, I have learned to listen for the faint music of hope, the pulse of love that endures beyond death.

Beat still my heart,
Beat still my mind,
Weary though thou art,
Carry his love along with thine,
Though heavy on thy shoulders
Crost fields throughout all time.
— “Beat Still My Heart”

My poems are not answers. They are offerings—fragments of a life lived in the shadow of absence, pieced together with longing and the fierce, unyielding devotion of a mother’s heart. They are the record of a journey through the labyrinth of grief, where each turn reveals both the ache of what is lost and the quiet radiance of what remains.

My child sleeps in a cradle of stars,
Gently rocked by the moon
Lullabies in his heart,
Heavens in galaxies swirl round to the sound
Of a mother and child’s love beating on.

Meteor showers, on the darkest of nights,
Bring comfort and joy to my child’s delight,
Aurora Borealis tints sky blue and green,
Where my child remembers his mother in dreams.

–“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”

There are questions that haunt the bereaved: Could I have known? Could I have saved you? The mind circles these unanswerable riddles, but the heart, battered and tender, learns to rest in the mystery.

I’d have reached right in to your dark night’s soul—
I would have held on, I would have clutched you,
I would have never let you go
But you told me “Mom I love you”
Oh my child, if I’d only known.
— “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”

In the landscape of loss, I have discovered that love is not diminished by death. It is transformed—becoming both ache and solace, shadow and light, the filament that binds the living to the lost.

Body, mind, soul, rough and ragged,
Weeping tears falling still throughout time,
Carrying weight of mourning and grieving
Falling broken when thou wert mine.
— “Beat Still My Heart”

I write for those who walk this wilderness with me—for the mothers and fathers, siblings and friends, whose lives have been marked by the unthinkable. My hope is that in these poems, you will find not only the echo of your own sorrow, but also the quiet assurance that you are not alone.

Starlight for a mobile twinkling ‘ere so bright,
To remember his mother that darkest of nights,
When slipped he from her grasp and fell through this earth,
Tumbling still planets, sun, folding time in rebirth.
— “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”

That we might understand we cannot separate mental illness from physical illness and that try as we might, we cannot see inside another’s pain.

–“Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand”

And how my heart keeps on beating
Is a mystery to all,
For without you beside me
Through life’s depth I crawl.

I live now life backwards
My heart beating in time,
To the life that we lived
When you, child, were mine.

Try as I might
I can’t seem to live,
For my dreams all belonged,
To your future forward lived.

—“Bury My Heart”

If you have come here searching for words to companion your grief, I welcome you. My poetry is not a map, but a lantern—casting light on the path we walk, together and alone, toward a horizon where love, undiminished, endures.

But boughs break and love falls through the cracks in the earth,
And the centre can’t hold when orbits, slung far, break their girth,
Gravitational interference, passing stars in the night,
Jetting orbs, falling stars in a moonless sky.
— “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”

Grief is wild—untamed, unending, and full of shadows. Yet within its depths, I have found moments of light: a memory, a poem, the gentle rustle of leaves, the warmth of a cup of tea. My words are both ache and love, a testament that even in the deepest sorrow, we can find meaning, connection, and—sometimes—hope. Through poetry, I reach for my son and for all who walk this path. If you find yourself here, know that you are not alone, and that love—like poetry—endures.

If you wish to read more, my collection, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide is available on Amazon Kindle. and many other reflections await you at myforeverson.com.

Bury My Heart

Professional Resources

Online Directory for Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress

After A Suicide Resource Directory: Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress
http://www.personalgriefcoach.net
This online directory links people who are grieving after a suicide death to resources and information.

Alliance of Hope for Suicide Survivors
http://www.allianceofhope.org
This organization for survivors of suicide loss provides information sheets, a blog, and a community forum through which survivors can share with each other.

Friends for Survival
http://www.friendsforsurvival.org
This organization is for suicide loss survivors and professionals who work with them. It produces a monthly newsletter and runs the Suicide Loss Helpline (1-800-646-7322). It also published Pathways to Purpose and Hope, a guide to building a community-based suicide survivor support program.

HEARTBEAT: Grief Support Following Suicide
http://heartbeatsurvivorsaftersuicide.org
This organization has chapters providing support groups for survivors of suicide loss in Colorado and some other states. Its website provides information sheets for survivors and a leader’s guide on how to start a new chapter of HEARTBEAT.

Resources and Support Groups

Parents of Suicides and Friends & Families of Suicides (POS-FFOS)
http://www.pos-ffos.com
This website provides a public message board called Suicide Grief Support Forum, a listserv for parents, a separate listserv for others, and an online chat room for survivors of suicide loss.

Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS)
https://www.taps.org/suicide
This organization provides resources and programs for people grieving the loss of a loved one who died while serving in the U.S. armed forces or as a result of their service. It has special resources and programs for suicide loss survivors.

United Survivors
https://unitesurvivors.org/
This organization is a place where people who have experienced suicide loss, suicide attempts, and suicidal thoughts and feelings, and their friends and families, can connect to use their lived experience to advocate for policy, systems, and cultural change.

Professional Organizations

American Association of Suicidology
suicidology.org • (202) 237-2280
Promotes public awareness, education and training for professionals, and sponsors an annual Healing After Suicide conference for suicide loss survivors. In addition to the conference, they offer a coping with suicide grief handbook by Jeffrey Jackson. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

The Compassionate Friends
compassionatefriends.org • (877) 969-0010
Offers resources for families after the death of a child. They sponsor support groups, newsletters and online support groups throughout the country, as well as an annual national conference for bereaved families.

The Dougy Center
The National Center for Grieving Children & Families
dougy.org • (503) 775-5683
Publishes extensive resources for helping children and teens who are grieving a death including death by suicide. Resources include the “Children, Teens and Suicide Loss” booklet created in partnership with AFSP. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

Link’s National Resource Center for Suicide Prevention and Aftercare
thelink.org/nrc-for-suicide-prevention-aftercar • 404-256-2919
Dedicated to reaching out to those whose lives have been impacted by suicide and connecting them to available resources.

Tragedy Assistance Programs for Survivors (TAPS)
taps.org/suicide • (800) 959-TAPS (8277)
Provides comfort, care and resources to all those grieving the death of a military loved one through a national peer support network and connection to grief resources, all at no cost to surviving families and loved ones.

LOSS
losscs.org
Offers support groups, remembrance events, companioning, suicide postvention and prevention education, and training to other communities interested in developing or enhancing their suicide postvention and prevention efforts.

Online resources

Alliance of Hope
allianceofhope.org
Provides a 24/7 online forum for suicide loss survivors.

Help Guide
helpguide.org
Provides resources and tips for how to navigate the loss of someone to suicide.

Parents of Suicides (POS) – Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS)
pos-ffos.com
An internet community to connect parents, friends, and family that have lost someone to suicide.

SAVE: Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
save.org/programs/suicide-loss-support • (952) 946-7998
Hosts resources for suicide loss survivor including a support group database, newsletter, survivor conference and the Named Memorial Program, which offers a special way to honor your loved one.

Siblings Survivors of Suicide Loss
siblingsurvivors.com
Provides resources and a platform to connect with others that have lost a sibling to suicide.

Finding professional care and support

Find a mental health provider

• afsp.org/FindAMentalHealthProfessional
• findtreatment.samhsa.gov
• mentalhealthamerica.net/finding-help
• inclusivetherapists.com
• afsp.org/suicide-bereavement-trained-clinicians

Find a provider for prolonged grief

• prolongedgrief.columbia.edu

Find additional resources for marginalized communities

• afsp.org/mental-health-resources-for-marginalized-communities

Crisis Services

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
988lifeline.org
Call or text 988 (press 1 for Veterans, 2 for Spanish, 3 for LGBTQ+ youth and young adults) or chat 988lifeline.org
A 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With crisis centers across the country, their mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential.

Crisis Text Line
crisistextline.org
Text TALK to 741-741 for English
Text AYUDA to 741-741 for Spanish
Provides free, text-based mental health support and crisis intervention by empowering a community of trained volunteers to support people in their moments of need, 24/7.

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Embracing Grief: A Poetic Journey of Love

Have you ever considered how your story might connect with others? We encourage you to share how you have embraced your grief and how it reflects the deep love you have for your child. Your experience can powerfully show how love and loss are connected, inspiring others on their journeys.

• Reflect on your experiences: How have you embraced your grief? How does your grief reflect the deep love you have for your child?

Sharing your story can be a meaningful step in your healing journey. Reach out, and let’s transform your grief into a narrative that inspires and uplifts.

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