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Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing

Vibrant fall foliage of different shrubs showcasing shades of red, orange, and green, with fallen leaves on the ground.
Vibrant autumn foliage showcasing the beauty of nature as it transitions through seasons, symbolizing healing and renewal amidst loss, My Forever Son, Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing

Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing

Key Takeaways

  • Beth Brown shares her journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide.
  • Her collection, Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing, combines poetry and nature photography to express overwhelming emotions after suicide loss.
  • Each poem explores love, loss, and the bond between a mother and her son, offering solace and reflection on mourning.
  • Beth’s work serves as an invitation to celebrate enduring love and find beauty in dark moments.
  • The article includes featured poems and articles focused on grief, healing, and understanding suicide.

Summary

Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing shares author Beth Brown’s journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. Through poetry and nature photography, she finds solace and a way to express her overwhelming emotions after suicide loss. Her collection, “Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing,” offers a poignant exploration of love, loss, and the enduring bond between a mother and her son. Her book, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide, is available on Amazon Kindle. 

Introduction

Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing shares author’s Beth Brown deeply personal journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. This heart-wrenching experience of suicide loss is one that many can relate to, yet Beth captures it with profound sensitivity and depth. Through the delicate art of poetry and the serene beauty of nature photography, she finds solace and a creative outlet to express her overwhelming emotions during such a turbulent time.

In her collection, “Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing,” Beth offers readers a poignant exploration of love, loss, and the enduring bond between a mother and her son. Each poem is a testament to her struggle and resilience, revealing the complexities of mourning while also celebrating the memories of her son. Beth’s words weave together sorrow and beauty, encouraging readers to reflect on their own experiences with loss and the ways they navigate their grief.

Through her evocative photographs, Beth enhances her poetic reflections, allowing the imagery of nature to complement her written words. The combination of verse and visual art creates a powerful narrative that resonates with those who have faced similar heartaches. By sharing her story, Beth not only honors Dylan’s memory but also creates a space for healing and hope for others who may feel lost in their sorrow.

Her work serves as a reminder that, even in the darkest moments, it is possible to find beauty and connection. “Find Hope Here” is more than just a collection of poems; it is an invitation to reflect on the journey of grief, acknowledge the pain, and ultimately, celebrate the love that continues to endure beyond loss. 

This article, Finding Beauty in Loss: Poetic Reflections on Suicide Loss, includes a selection of featured poems and articles offering reflections on grief, healing, and understanding suicide. 

My Forever Son

My Forever Son explores the profound grief, hope, and healing that follow the tragedy of losing a child to suicide.

My Forever Son dovetails the author’s journey of descending into deep grief, searching for hope, and finding healing along the way.

Table of Contents

A smiling woman with long, light brown hair sitting in a cozy setting, wearing a green shirt, bringing a sense of hope amid loss, author Beth Brown, My Forever Son, Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing
A reflective moment captured with a warm smile, bringing a sense of hope amid loss, author Beth Brown, My Forever Son, Finding Beauty in Loss: Poetic Reflections on Suicide Loss
Pink flowers trail over a cream and brown stoneware flower pot resting on bricks, symbolizing hope and resilience, My Forever Son
Pink flowers trail over a cream and brown stoneware flower pot resting on bricks, symbolizing hope and resilience, My Forever Son

Author’s Note: A Poetic Quest for Healing After Losing My Son

Twelve years ago, I lost my 20-year-old son, Dylan, to suicide, a heartbreaking event that shattered my world and plunged me into a dark period of grief. 

During those long months, I found myself grappling with overwhelming emotions and thoughts, questioning everything around me and struggling to make sense of what will never make sense. I entered into a deep grief filled with solitude and despair, a darkness so bleak I questioned ever being able to see light again.

In the beginning, I had no words. No voice. No ability to express the grief I was feeling. 

My words were lost in torrents of tears, in stark contrast to the vibrant discussions I used to lead in my college composition and literature classes.

Perhaps it’s important to preface that I was teaching college composition and literature when I lost my son to suicide, a tragedy that shattered all of me. The irony of discussing the complexities of human emotion with my students while grappling with my own profound sorrow was not lost on me. 

Each day, I faced the challenge of maintaining my professional facade, all the while battling an internal tempest that seemed insurmountable, wondering how to bridge the chasm between my role as an educator and the personal devastation I was enduring.

Wild purple geraniums surrounded by green leaves near a water pond in mid-summer, symbolizing hope and a moment of tranquility, My Forever Son
Wild purple geraniums surrounded by green leaves in mid-summer, symbolizing hope and a moment of tranquility, My Forever Son

My Life Before Losing My Son

Books, lectures, teaching—I once felt empowered by my voice, a resonant tool for sharing ideas and knowledge. It was a time when I believed in the strength of my words and the influence they carried, inspiring others to think deeply and engage in meaningful conversations. 

I reveled in the connections I forged through sharing my thoughts, feeling a sense of purpose in my contributions to the world. But when Dylan died by suicide, I felt consumed by my grief. My heart collapsed inward in sharp pain, I retreated from the outside world, and my words eluded me. 

Teaching was impossible. Losing Dylan shattered my life, leaving me, on the outside at least, grappling with an overwhelming silence that echoed louder than any lecture or written page. 

On the inside, I was screaming sounds I did not recognize as my own.

The Depth of My Loss Brought My Life to a Standstill

The vibrant energy that once fueled my passion for writing vanquished, and I found myself questioning everything without being able to lend voice to the confusion and overwhelming feelings I was moving through in my grief.

The depth of my loss silenced the joy I once derived from sharing my thoughts and connecting with others.

All of my life came to a standstill as I entered a place of deep grief. It is only in retrospect and in these twelve years past my son’s suicide that I see how all-consuming my grief was. 

Diminishing the confidence that fuels expression, my grief stifled my voice completely. It’s been a difficult battle to reclaim my sense of self amidst such sorrow.

A Poetic Quest for Self-Forgiveness and Healing

Journaling was awkward. I couldn’t put all the pain I was feeling into words that did justice to the enormity of my heartbreak. But I kept writing. Slowly, in keeping a record of my grief, I realized I was creating a poetic journey about losing a child to suicide.

A close-up of a vibrant red rose surrounded by green leaves, set against a textured gray wall, symbolizing hope and renewal, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
A vibrant red rose blooms amidst lush green leaves, symbolizing hope and renewal in the journey of healing, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Discovering the Poems in “Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing”

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a heartfelt collection of poems and reflections by Beth Brown, the compassionate voice behind the My Forever Son blog. This poignant work navigates the deep, overwhelming sorrow that accompanies the tragic loss of a child to suicide. In her writing, Brown bravely shares her personal journey through grief, revealing how the act of writing poetry and connecting with the beauty of nature became vital sources of comfort and healing for her in the midst of such profound pain.

Through the author’s heartfelt verses, she reaches out with warmth and understanding to those who are journeying through their own sorrows. With her enchanting photography of the trees, shrubs, and flowers that grace her gardens throughout the seasons, Brown lovingly shares a beacon of hope, brightly illuminating the shadows cast by grief.

On Finding Hope: Photographing My Gardens Brings Healing

In nature, I find calm in the wake of profound sorrow and healing in the cycling of the seasons. Predictable. Beautiful in the spring, promising renewal after a long winter’s rest. Brilliant hues in the summer months. Autumn bringing trees and shrubs bejeweled in vivid reds, oranges, and reds. And then the stillness and monochromatic sketch of what can be a too long winter’s sleep.

Photographs from the Wintry Months in My Gardens

Snow covered branches of a saucer cup Magnolia in winter, My Forever Son, Suicide: It Never Lets Go
A stark image of a magnolia tree in winter, framed by an ever-green Norway Spruce in the background, all against a blue sky with dark clouds above tinged with light that seems surreal, My Forever Son, A Poem About Being Haunted by Guilt After Losing My Son to Suicide: Still From Sky I'm Falling
Snow-covered branches of a magnolia tree in winter framed by brick wall and snow in the background, My Forever Son, c
Icicles hanging from a wall of bricks, with some dry twigs in the foreground.
A small bird, a junco with a gray topside and a white underside, in a triangle of sunlight across a snow-covered pond, photographed for My Forever Son, An Abrupt Awakening: Foray Into the Holidays 2015 and The Holidays Descend Suicide Never Ends
Glistening Snow reflecting sun's prisms in tree shadows in winter, rose bush with brown leaves of winter in foreground, my forever son, The holidays descend: suicide never ends and Reflections on Grief in Year 6 After Losing My Son to Suicide
Winter Magnolia Tree Shadow in Snow with Brick Wall, My Forever Son, Suicide: It Never Lets Go and The Holidays Descend Suicide Never Ends, Suicide: It Never Lets Go
A snowy scene featuring evergreen branches covered in snow, with a group of small birds pecking at the ground, and a bright red cardinal prominently positioned in the foreground.
Winter snow looking out over a low brick wall through a bare tree into the glare of the sun, photographed for My Forever Son, An Abrupt Awakening, Foray into the Holidays and He Left Too Soon, Also A Mother's Reflections after Losing My Son to Suicide
Snow-covered brick wall with intricate woven brick work pattern in late afternoon winter, My Forever Son, Journals from the Heart
Winter Sun in Blue Sky with a Few Wispy White Clouds Shining through Bare Trees, My Forever Son, The Holidays Descend: Suicide Never Ends
A snow-covered tree stands in a winter landscape, surrounded by a fence and scattered snow on the ground, evoking feelings of stillness and reflection.
A red-bellied woodpecker at a bird-feeder in winter with snow on ground, My Forever Son, A Poem About Being Haunted by Guilt After Losing My Son to Suicide: Still From Sky I'm Falling

A Long Winter’s Rest for Trees, Shrubs, and Flowers 

This dormant season in winter echoes the hopelessness of my grief: everything feels, looks, seems bleak and forsaken. 

This dormant season in winter echoes the hopelessness of my grief: everything feels, looks, seems bleak and forsaken. An empty landscape. Gray skies for months. A blanket of snow in white, though only the stark limbs of trees and shrubs. At times, though, red berries appear on some shrubs, supplying food for birds and wildlife. All this to say I can’t see life against this wintry scene.

But in photographing nature through the seasons, I began to see (again), the brilliance of a long winter’s rest for trees, shrubs, and flowers. To study nature and botany is to realize that what appears lifeless is actually the process of life within all of nature renewing itself. Trusting in what I cannot see brings hope and healing.

Photographs from My Gardens Come Spring

Yellow center white petals daffodil cluster in early spring framed by brick wall in background, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son and Finding Hope, Healing and Resilience in Nature
Creamy White and Yellow Daffodils in Early Spring
Purple Crocus on Slender Green and White Striped Stalks Getting Ready to Open in Early Spring, My Forever Son, How to Survive the First Year After Losing Your Child to Suicide
Close-up of emerging pink tulip buds surrounded by green leaves, symbolizing renewal and hope in a garden setting.
A close-up view of delicate peach-colored iris flowers blooming amidst green leaves and scattered dry foliage.
Pink Raspberry Azalea in Spring Bloom, My Forever Son, Healing Through Poetry: Grieving a Child's Loss
Tender pink blossoms of a pink crabapple tree in early spring, My Forever Son, About My Forever Son: A Journey Through Grief
Close-up of vibrant pink azalea flowers in full bloom against a backdrop of green foliage.
Purple Phlox in Spring Leading to Water Pond with Cascading Waterfall Rocks, and pink spring flowers, My Forever Son, Navigating the Ever-changing Landscape of Grief: Reflecting on Year Nine
Beautiful Pink and white striped phlox surround a water pond with 2 waterfalls in early spring, My Forever Son, Coping with Grief: Strategies for Memorial Dates
Pink Phlox in Bloom Close Up, Photographed for My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide, Living Backwards Going Forward
Lavender Phlox in Spring, My Forever Son,
Robin in Early Spring Coldsnap
Close-up of soft peach-colored flowers with delicate petals and yellow stamens, creating a serene and peaceful botanical image, My Forever Son
Close-up of delicate pink flowers symbolizing hope and renewal in the context of grief and healing, My Forever Son

Spring Brings Beauty and Hope

Even against the cold remnants of a long winter–scattered clumps of snow, a robin redbreast plumped out to keep itself warm against a late March frost, brown dried leaves with nary a sign of color anywhere, spring breaks through. At first just small bits of color. A hint of purple as crocus push through thawing ground, then the vivid yellows of daffodils leaning towards the sun and the suddenness of blue bells. Rhododendron yawns and stretches its lavender limbs to awaken azalea, still sleepy with snow though greening beneath it all.

What seems forever gone in the gray doldrums of winter arrives with an abundance of joy come spring. 

Writing My Way Through Grief to Find Hope and Healing

Snippets of language emerged as poetic reflections

Three years into my grief, I began writing journal entries. Short. A few feelings. About my day and where I was in my grief journey. Then slowly, snippets of language emerged as poetic reflections. Words shaped the deep feelings and emotional longing in my heart, and as I continued writing, I began to find small glimpses of hope in unexpected ways. 

Photographing my gardens garnered a way to coalesce all the many feelings and words I’d been unable to express. And the more I photographed through the seasons, the more glimmers of hope I found along the way.

Each poignant poem in Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a dedicated blog post in its own right, replete with the inspiration behind the poem.

The poems included in Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing appear below. Each poem is a blog post in its own right, oftentimes replete with the inspiration behind the poem.

Each poem moves the reader through the profound emotions of grief and healing after losing a child. 

Many of the poems tell narratives I remember from my son’s childhood. This is significant–reconstructing the narrative of our lives during his growing-up years brings release for all the love and beautiful memories before the trauma of losing him. Writing these poems and narratives, these poetic reflections on love and loss, have helped me learn to carry love and ache together.

Still I write. Still I heal. Still I miss my son.

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Writing these poems and narratives, these poetic reflections on love and loss, have helped me learn to carry love and ache together.

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

A close-up image of a vibrant red rose resting on a soft, white surface adorned with delicate baby's breath, symbolizing love and remembrance, My Forever Son, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide
A red rose rests delicately on a bed of white flowers, symbolizing love and remembrance amidst grief, My Forever Son, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide

“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide Summary The poem “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” in the post, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving the Devastating Loss of a Child to Suicide explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. The…Read More

A full moon is visible in a nighttime sky, framed by tree branches, creating a serene and tranquil atmosphere, symbolizing hope and reflection amidst grief, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide
A serene night sky illuminated by a full moon, framed by the silhouettes of trees, symbolizing hope and reflection amidst grief, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide

“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide Summary “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem On Losing My Son to Suicide is a poem by Beth Brown that explores the profound grief and regret of losing a child to suicide. Through vivid imagery and heartfelt repetition, the…Read More

A woman kneels at a gravestone in a cemetery, visibly grieving as she places flowers on the tombstone that reads 'SON.' The landscape is filled with other gravestones in the background, highlighting the solemn atmosphere, reflecting on loss and memories, My Forever Son, “He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
A mother grieving at her son’s grave, reflecting on loss and memories, My Forever Son, “He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow

“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow Summary “He Left Too Soon” is a poem about the profound sorrow and anguish of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her personal experience of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. Through her writing,…Read More

A man and woman sit closely together, sharing an emotional moment as they comfort each other, surrounded by a floral backdrop. The woman, with curly hair, leans her head on the man's shoulder, conveying a sense of vulnerability and connection, reflecting the themes of grief and healing explored in the article, My Forever Son, “Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents
Two individuals share an emotional moment of support, reflecting the themes of grief and healing explored in the article, My Forever Son, “Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents

Poems about Losing a Child

“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents

“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents Summary “Sorrow Buried in Love: A Poem for Grieving Parents” explores the profound grief and complex emotions experienced by parents who have lost a child to suicide. The poem emphasizes the importance of honoring the child’s memory while navigating the challenging path of healing, highlighting that…Read More

Close-up of vibrant red and purple leaves scattered on the ground, showcasing the changing colors of autumn, exemplifying the beauty of autumn's transition, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”
A close-up of vibrant red and purple leaves scattered on the ground, exemplifying the beauty of autumn’s transition, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling” Summary Beth Brown, a devoted mother who suffered the heartbreaking loss of her son to suicide, recounts her profound journey of healing through the power of poetry in her poignant blog, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide. In her deeply…Read More

A ship struggling in tumultuous ocean waves, illustrating the theme of turmoil and loss, symbolizing the emotional turmoil of grief and loss, My Forever Son, The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy
A ship struggling against turbulent waves, symbolizing the emotional turmoil of grief and loss, My Forever Son, The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy

The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy Summary The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy features the grief poem, “Beat Still My Heart,”a powerful elegy that uses shipwreck imagery to convey the grief of losing a child to suicide. The grief poem, written by Beth Brown, explores…Read More

A close-up of a beautifully crafted, transparent red glass heart sculpture reflecting light, showcasing intricate designs and patterns, symbolizing love and remembrance, My Forever Son, “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: Powerful Poem
A beautifully crafted heart-shaped glass sculpture, symbolizing love and remembrance, My Forever Son, “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: Powerful Poem

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: Powerful Poem

“If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: Powerful Poem Summary The powerful poem “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. It delves into themes of guilt, love, and the struggle to find healing. Through vivid imagery…Read More

A close-up view of vibrant purple petunias and delicate hosta flowers surrounded by lush green leaves, capturing the beauty of a garden in bloom, symbolizing hope and renewal amid life's challenges, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
A vibrant garden scene showcasing purple petunias and budding hosta, symbolizing hope and renewal amid life’s challenges, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a heartfelt collection of poems on love and loss that tenderly explores the profound pain of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her deeply personal journey through grief, illustrating how she…Read More

Close-up of soft pink roses with raindrops, surrounded by green foliage, symbolizing hope and beauty in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, “Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss
A close-up of blooming pink roses, symbolizing hope and beauty in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, “Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss

“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss “Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound grief and longing experienced after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the author’s personal journey of navigating life without her son, Dylan, and…Read More

Close-up of vibrant red and orange autumn leaves on a plant, showcasing the beauty of nature during the fall season, , symbolizing the beauty found in the changing seasons of life and the journey of healing, My Forever Son, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief
Vibrant autumn leaves display shades of red and orange, symbolizing the beauty found in the changing seasons of life and the journey of healing, My Forever Son, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief

“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Summary “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back” is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound guilt and sorrow parents experience after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the haunting questions of “What If?” and “Why…Read More

Dramatic dark clouds gathering in the sky above a landscape, with an electricity pylon visible, symbolizing the emotional journey through grief, My Forever Son, Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”
A dramatic sky filled with dark clouds, evoking feelings of turbulence and impending change, symbolizing the emotional journey through grief, My Forever Son, Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”

Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem, “He Left Too Soon” Summary Beth Brown’s poignant poem, “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere -Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon,” skillfully intertwines the sorrow stemming from the loss of her son to suicide with the tumult wrought by a powerful Derecho storm that occurred on the day…Read More

A serene lake surrounded by lush green forests and mountains under a clear blue sky, symbolizing hope and healing in nature, My Forever Son, When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’
A serene landscape featuring a tranquil lake surrounded by towering mountains and lush greenery, symbolizing hope and healing in nature, My Forever Son, When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’

understanding suicide

When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’

When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ Summary When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ explores the complexities of suicide and includes a compassionate treatise written by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” challenging the notion that it is a choice. The treatise, “Ode…Read More

A girl in a pink coat and white hat crouches down near a cluster of yellow daffodils in a garden surrounded by bare trees, symbolizing renewal and hope amidst the backdrop of spring, My Forever Son, Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss
A child kneeling beside vibrant yellow daffodils in a garden, symbolizing renewal and hope amidst the backdrop of spring, My Forever Son, “Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss“

poems of love and loss

“Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil”: A Poem of Love and Loss

“Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss” Love and Loss is a heartfelt reflection on the themes of love and loss, born from the deep and painful grief of the author following the heartbreaking…Read More

A serene view of a blue sky scattered with wispy white clouds, framed by lush green foliage and trees, evoking a sense of calm and connection to nature, embodying hope and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss
A serene view of lush greenery under a cloudy blue sky, embodying hope and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss

poems of love and loss

“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss

“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss Summary “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss depicts a deeply personal and emotional journey of losing a child to suicide. The author effectively conveys the profound impact of grief through heartfelt words and metaphors. The…Read More

A shooting star streaking across a dark night sky filled with twinkling stars, set against a mountain silhouette in the distance, My Forever Son, “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide
A shooting star streaks across a clear night sky, symbolizing fleeting moments and the beauty of nature, My Forever Son, “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide

“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide is a heartfelt piece on losing a child to suicide that explores the profound grief and longing experienced after such a tragic loss. The…Read More

A tree with bright yellow leaves stands against a wall, showcasing the beauty of autumn foliage, symbolizing the beauty and transition of the seasons, My Forever Son, The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience
A majestic tree showcasing golden autumn foliage, symbolizing the beauty and transition of the seasons, My Forever Son, The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience

Healing Grief

The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience

The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience Summary The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience explores the author’s journey of grief through the metaphor of a Magnolia tree’s cyclical seasons. The author uses photography to illustrate the parallels between nature’s cycles and the seasons of grief, finding hope and healing in…Read More

Embracing Grief: A Mother’s Poetic Journey

From journaling to discovering the poetic language that encapsulates my grief, I penned my path to healing, culminating in the creation of my book, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide.

The anthology of poems in this book provides a profound and moving examination of grief, intricately intertwining original verses that delve into themes of loss, guilt, hope, self-forgiveness, and the path to healing. Expertly curated, the arrangement of poems invites deep reflection, serving as a treasured companion for those in search of solace and connection during difficult times.

My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide

A close-up view of soft peach-colored flowers nestled among vibrant green leaves, symbolizing hope and renewal, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide
Delicate pink flowers blooming amidst vibrant green leaves, symbolizing hope and renewal, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide

Healing the Deep Wound of Losing My Son

Grief and Healing After Losing a Child: “To Hold This Pain and This Beauty Side-by- Side”

The light is soft, it is beautiful here, there is a breeze. The pain is always there for us. It will be waiting at the apartment when we return tonight, it will be lying next to us in bed or come to us when we wake; we always have it. But we have to let this beauty in, too. That will be the work of all the rest of our days: to hold this pain and this beauty side by side, without letting the one crush or crowd out the other. We have to let this beauty in, too.

Sarah Wildman, I Am Trying to See What My Beautiful Daughter Saw, Aug. 25, 2023, New York Times

Grieving the Deep Wound of Losing My Son 

Healing the deep wound of losing my son is ongoing in my life. It always will be. Always he is there. In my sleep, my waking hours. On his birthday and mine. When on his memorial date I go to see him where he is not. His grave. For he walks with me. We remember, and I smile with love and with heartbreak. These are not easily separated. Ache and love walk together, joined in my heart. 

In early grief, only ache flowed through me. All the time. Everywhere. In his room. In my work. I couldn’t breathe without him. 

Healing Through Carrying Pain and Love Together

Now, thirteen years later, my love for my son and my ache of missing him have joined together. My ache is my love, and I have grown accustomed to carrying the weight. I have moved forward in my life. Not moved on, for that implies I left something, someone, behind. 

Dylan is always with me. Nudging me to smile at the little things in life. The silly antics of my two rescue kittens. The depth and brilliance of my gardens–flowers, shrubs, trees, a water pond. He reminds me how precious life is. How fragile.

My Forever Son Reminds Me How Precious Life Is. How Fragile.

I capture life’s fragility in my photographs of my gardens. I find color, hope, and peace in nature. Spring brings the reawakening of all the flowers, shrubs, and trees that lay dormant over the long, cold, bitter months of winter. Each year, purple and yellow crocus emerge from their winter’s sleep, then yellow and white daffodils, and shortly thereafter, red tulips rising tall, even when cooler temperatures still prevail.

But come spring, when the brilliance of sun, blue skies, and flowers seemingly appear against an impossible, immutable winter, I find hope in nature’s resilience.

Finding Healing in Nature

I try to reorient myself walking each morning. I try to see the blooming flowers, the wild potato blossoms that run the stretch of the path near my home, the fecundity of August, the greenery that rushed in during the months since Orli left us here, to fend for ourselves. I find I cannot talk to people I see at the farmers market, but I can appreciate the ripening fruit, the taste of late summer, the heat in the skin of each peach.

Sarah Wildman, I Am Trying to See What My Beautiful Daughter Saw, Aug. 25, 2023, New York Times

I Couldn’t Save My Son: Grappling with Guilt in Grief

I still have a tendency to wake in the night and go over and over all of the things that went wrong and where I imagine I might have protected Orli. I berate myself for having failed her. It is completely irrational; it is also true. I could not save her; she could not be saved. I am her mother; ergo, I failed. In the light of day, I see the faulty logic of 4 a.m. 

Sarah Wildman, I Am Trying to See What My Beautiful Daughter Saw, Aug. 25, 2023, New York Times

Coping with Guilt in Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide

It is not easy to reconcile the guilt of losing a child, the heaviness of the guilt of losing my only child. I included the passage above about Sarah Wildman’s guilt over losing her daughter because it so eloquently amplifies a parent’s response to losing a child. 

Losing my son to suicide changed everything about my life. This blog, My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide, is my attempt to make sense of a world that can never make sense. Suicide doesn’t make sense. But finding a way to live in peace with who I am now does make sense. I live on that my son might live too.

Photographing My Gardens Brings Healing and Peace

Gardening, along with the art of photography and the expression of my emotions through poetry, blog posts, books, and songs, brings me solace. Preserving the temporal, ephemeral fragility of flowers in my photographs brings resolve and sometimes, even acceptance of what I can and cannot change in this life.

NAVIGATING GRIEF: SUPPORT FOR PARENTS AFTER SUICIDE

Close-up of a vibrant pink flower with a green background, ssymbolizes hope and healing amidst the pain of loss, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources, My Forever Son
A vibrant pink flower symbolizes hope and healing amidst the pain of loss, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources, My Forever Son

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources

Losing my son to suicide created a void of cataclysmic proportions in all areas of my life: professional, emotional, spiritual, community, friends, physical, health. Navigating profound grief meant finding support, which you can read about here: Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources. My well-being turned in the split second I learned he had taken his life, and it would be a long time coming before I could pick up the pieces of my life to move forward in grief, carrying love along with the permanent ache of losing my son.

A close-up view of a white magnolia flower surrounded by vibrant green leaves, My Forever Son, Coping with the Grief of Losing a Child to Suicide
A delicate white flower surrounded by vibrant green leaves, symbolizing hope and healing amidst grief, My Forever Son, Coping with the Grief of Losing a Child to Suicide

Coping with the Grief of Losing a Child to Suicide

Acute grief plunged my heart, soul, and sense of who I was into a chasm of despair. Coping with the Grief of Losing a Child to Suicide shares the ferocity of my grief in the immediacy of my son’s suicide. Weeping even in my sleep, broken even as I was, I didn’t believe that the acute pain of early grief would ever cease. As I write, it’s been 12 years since Dylan died. My grief has changed shape over the course of my grieving, softening in the intensity of the agonizing sharp pain of my early grief.

Red Roses with Vibrant Green Leaves Against a Stone Wall, symbolizing love and remembrance amidst grief, symbolizing love and remembrance amidst grief, Finding Hope, Healing, and Resilience in Nature, My Forever Son
A vibrant display of red roses, symbolizing love and remembrance amidst grief, Finding Hope, Healing, and Resilience in Nature, My Forever Son

Finding Hope, Healing, and Resilience in Nature

 Finding Hope, Healing, and Resilience in Nature explores the theme of finding hope and healing through nature after the loss of a child. It describes the emotional connection with nature and its capacity to heal after grief, using the arrival of spring as a symbol of hope and renewal. The author emphasizes the steadfast nature of spring, reminding readers of patience through difficult seasons and conveying a message of trust and hope.

I am no longer in the dark place where my son’s suicide once left me, though I carry his ache and love with me always. You can read more about this here: Finding Hope, Healing, and Resilience in Nature. While Dylan’s absence still lingers (and always will), I have learned, in time, to embrace the good memories, allowing them to guide me toward healing.

I am more than a decade out from my son’s suicide. Time has not “healed” my grief, but time and space has moved me beyond the acute grief of early trauma to a place where my life has glimpses of hope and even happiness, as is, as now. Losing my son to suicide has forever changed me, but I’ve found healing in moving forward in my life, carrying both ache and love, always, for my son.

Glimpses of Hope in Small Things

I find glimpses of hope in small things–my gardens, a cup of tea, and sunshine streaming through the window in late afternoon. I honor Dylan’s memory by seeking connection with others, sharing my story, and advocating for mental health awareness, determined to ensure that his legacy inspires hope and support for those in similar struggles.

Writing and Journaling Bring Healing 

Writing and journaling have been instrumental in helping me release so much overwhelming grief. While hope and healing may still feel distant at times, they have gently found me in my current reality: here, living each day without my son.

Close-up of a vibrant yellow sunflower, showcasing its intricate center and petals and symbolizing hope and resilience in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Three Years of Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide
A vibrant sunflower symbolizing hope and resilience in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Three Years of Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide

Three Years of Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide

Three Years of Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide is a profoundly touching collection of journals from the author’s journey through grief, hope, and healing, marking three years since losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. She has faced numerous challenges, grappling with emotions like anger and despair, ultimately discovering moments of clarity and acceptance. The thoughtfully selected images, often featuring her gardens, provide a visual reprieve and deepen the emotional impact of her words, inviting readers to reflect on their own healing. 

Each entry in Three Years of Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide illustrates her evolving grief and highlights how she finds glimmers of hope amidst darkness, encouraging others to embrace vulnerability and share their own stories. Through her candid reflections, the author offers companionship to those navigating their grief, reminding them they are not alone on this arduous journey.

Close-up view of delicate pink azalea flowers against a soft green background, My Forever Son, Finding Hope in Nature's Resilience Through Spring Flowers
Beautiful pink azalea flowers symbolizing hope and resilience in nature after loss, My Forever Son, Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers

Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers

In Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers, the author finds solace and healing in nature’s resilience, particularly during spring, after losing her son to suicide. The cyclical nature of the seasons, with the promise of renewal and rebirth, mirrors the author’s journey through grief and the hope for healing. Through journaling and photography, the author captures the beauty of nature and finds a poetic way to express her sorrow and search for self-forgiveness.

A Note from the Author

It’s true that one never fully “heals” from the loss of a child to suicide, yet I have gradually begun to bridge the profound gap between my own grief and the world around me, even if it happens at a pace that, at times, feels ‘ere so slow. I find profound hope and beauty in nature, and in its changing seasons, the steadfastness of life. Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers has been integral to moving through my grief after losing my 20-year-old-son, my only child, to suicide eleven years ago.

A close-up shot of purple flowers and a pale pink daylily, with raindrops on the petals, set against a blurred brick background, symbolizing beauty and resilience amidst grief, My Forever Son, Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss.
A serene garden scene featuring vibrant violet flowers and a delicate pink lily, symbolizing beauty and resilience amidst grief, My Forever Son, Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss explores the heart-wrenching journey of grief and healing following the loss of her son, Dylan, to suicide. She shares how grief can strike unexpectedly, flooding her with overwhelming despair. The struggle to rediscover joy after such a profound loss feels like an uphill battle, as even the smallest moments can be shadowed by sorrow. Learning to navigate life without him is a daunting challenge, with constant reminders of the void he left in her heart and home. 

Yet, amidst the pain, the author finds comfort in fleeting moments—whether it’s a gentle breeze that whispers memories of Dylan or a warm smile from friends who truly understand her heartbreak. She clings to the hope of a future reunion with him, which gently guides her through the darkness. Ultimately, she comes to understand that honoring Dylan’s memory not only keeps his spirit alive but also provides her with the strength she needs to embrace each new day.

A close-up of various wildflowers including white daisies with yellow centers, surrounded by green leaves and other small plants, symbolizing hope and renewal, Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide
A serene garden scene showcasing delicate white and yellow flowers amidst lush greenery, symbolizing hope and renewal, Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide

Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide 

Suicide is an out of the natural order of life death, a perpetual questioning of why they took their life, a constant review of what if? if only. . .and should have, could have, would have.Beth Brown, Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide, My Forever Son

Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide is a poignant and compassionate exploration of the overwhelming emotions and hurdles parents face following the tragic loss of a child to suicide. This heartfelt post delves deep into the raw and complex journey, offering understanding, support, and guidance tailored specifically for grieving families. It features meaningful quotes from mental health professionals and fellow bereaved parents, relating to other relevant posts that discuss different aspects of loss and resilience.

Crucial resources for seeking professional help and healing, including hotlines, support groups, and therapy options that can foster emotional recovery, are provided. By addressing the often-unspoken feelings of guilt and isolation, this article aims to validate the pain parents experience while also inspiring hope and renewal through shared stories and effective coping strategies. Through its comprehensive approach, the post encourages a dialogue around mental health and highlights the importance of community support in the healing process.

A black metal chair surrounded by fallen autumn leaves in various shades of red and yellow, positioned near a window, symbolizing loss and reflection, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Poem, My Forever Son
A lonely chair surrounded by fallen autumn leaves, symbolizing loss and reflection, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Poem, My Forever Son

“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Poem

That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Poem is a poignant poem exploring the guilt parents face after losing a child to suicide. It captures the emotional anguish of “What If?” and “Why Didn’t I See?” reflecting the deep sorrow of their grieving journey. Each line invites readers to experience the despair of such a loss while suggesting that love can illuminate dark moments. The poem provides insight into the author’s experience with loss, using vivid imagery to express the tidal wave of emotions that follow. The blend of poetry, personal anecdotes, and support resources amplifies the author’s voice and connects with the audience, encouraging exploration of their own feelings about loss.

A person writing on a piece of paper with a pen, partially obscured by an object in the foreground, reflecting parental self-blame and guilt in grief, Self-Blame and Guilt—I Couldn’t Save My Son, My Forever Son
A young person writing notes, reflecting parental self-blame and guilt in grief, Self-Blame and Guilt—I Couldn’t Save My Son, My Forever Son 

Self-Blame and Guilt–I Couldn’t Save My Son

Self-Blame and Guilt—I Couldn’t Save My Son explores the heavy burden of self-blame and guilt many parents endure after losing a child to suicide. It addresses the struggle between cherishing memories and confronting harsh realities that feel insurmountable. Parents often grapple with guilt, wondering if they could have intervened or recognized their child’s distress. This journey through sorrow is intertwined with societal stigma and expectations about grieving. Finding healthy outlets for these feelings, like therapy or creative expression, can be healing.

A close-up view of various fallen leaves in shades of red and pink scattered on the ground, symbolizing the emotions of grief and remembrance, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem:
A pile of vibrant red and pink leaves, symbolizing the emotions of grief and remembrance, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling“

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling” delivers a deeply personal exploration of grief, guilt, self-blame, and regret after losing a child to suicide, a tragedy that weighs heavily on the hearts of many parents and caregivers. This powerful collection includes not only the featured poem but also a variety of other poetic works that delve into similar themes of loss and healing, providing a multifaceted perspective on the mourning process. Alongside the poetry, the book offers valuable resources for support, guiding readers through their darkest moments while fostering a sense of community and understanding. The featured poem, “Still from Sky I’m Falling,” serves as a poignant anchor, as it encompasses the emotions and questions that arise in such challenging times, accompanied by the story behind its creation and heartfelt reflections from the author, inviting readers to engage with their own experiences of grief.

A woman with a contemplative expression, illuminated by soft light that creates shadows across her face, conveying a sense of deep emotion and introspection, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources
A reflective moment capturing the deep emotions associated with grief and self-examination after a tragic loss, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources is a compassionate guide designed to support parents who are heartbroken from the loss of a child to suicide. This resource delves into the multifaceted emotions that accompany such profound grief, highlighting the crucial need for self-care, the value of seeking professional help, and the comfort of connecting with support groups. It offers coping strategies and thoughtful grief tips, such as engaging in creative pursuits, finding peace in nature, and honoring your child’s memory through meaningful memorials.

What I have learned these past 12 years of grief and healing is that my love was not enough to save my son, to protect my son, to prevent his suicide. Love, no matter how strong the connection, cannot prevent death.Beth Brown, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources, My Forever Son

Finding Beauty in Loss: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

A close-up image of a stone lion statue with detailed features, including a mane and piercing eyes, sitting on a paved surface surrounded by fallen leaves, embodying strength and resilience, complements the themes of grief and healing expressed in the article, My Forever Son, Walking through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide
A detailed stone sculpture of a lion, embodying strength and resilience, complements the themes of grief and healing expressed in the article, My Forever Son, Walking through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide

Grief

Walking through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide

Walking through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide Summary The article “Walking through Shadows and Talking in Tears: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide” explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide, emphasizing the importance of sharing personal stories and seeking support.…Read more

Close-up of an orange rose blossom with soft petals, surrounded by green leaves, symbolizing beauty and resilience in the journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents
A close-up of a vibrant orange rose, symbolizing beauty and resilience in the journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents

Healing

Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents

Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents Summary Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Grieving Parents offers compassionate guidance for parents navigating the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. The article emphasizes self-care, support systems, and professional help, along with encouraging parents to connect…Read more

Close-up of colorful autumn leaves in shades of pink, purple, and green, showcasing the beauty of nature during the fall season, My Forever Son, Surviving Suicide Grief: Does the Pain Ever End?
Vibrant autumn leaves showcasing the beauty of nature’s transformation, My Forever Son, Surviving Suicide Grief: Does the Pain Ever End?

Losing a Child to Suicide

Surviving Suicide Grief: Does the Pain Ever End?

Surviving Suicide Grief: Does the Pain Ever End? Asks a Parent Who Lost a Child to Suicide Summary The author reflects on the complex nature of grief after losing a child to suicide in “Surviving Suicide Grief: “Does the Pain Ever End?”, expressing that while pain changes, it never fully disappears. Support groups and counseling…Read more

Close-up view of green leaves and branches with water droplets, creating a serene and refreshing atmosphere, symbolizing resilience and renewal amidst life's challenges, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide: It’s Not a Choice
Raindrops glisten on vibrant green leaves, symbolizing resilience and renewal amidst life’s challenges, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide: It’s Not a Choice

When Love Isn’t Enough

Understanding Suicide: It’s Not a Choice

Understanding Suicide: It’s Not a Choice The article, Understanding Suicide: It’s Not a Choice, affirms with well-documented research that suicide is not a choice, but a tragic outcome of intense emotional pain and distorted judgment. The stigma surrounding suicide persists, hindering understanding and perpetuating the misconception that it is a selfish act. Suicide epidemiologists…Read more

Close-up of vibrant pink and white flowers amidst green foliage, symbolizing nature's beauty and resilience, symbolizing resilience and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, “I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief, symbol
A vibrant display of zinnias blooming amidst lush greenery, symbolizing resilience and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, “I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief

Grief

“I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief

“I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief Summary “I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief” is a collection of poignant blog posts chronicling the author’s emotional journey through the third year after losing her son to suicide. The posts explore the complexities of grief, the struggle for acceptance, and…Read more

Abstract watercolor painting with vibrant colors including teal, pink, green, and yellow, showcasing various brush strokes and blending techniques, A Decade After Suicide Loss: Reflections on Longterm Grief
An abstract watercolor painting featuring soft, blended colors reflecting the journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, A Decade After Suicide Loss: Reflections on Longterm Grief

Reflections after losing a child to suicide

A Decade After Suicide Loss: Reflections on Longterm Grief

A Decade After Suicide Loss: Reflections on Longterm Grief Summary A Decade After Suicide Loss: Reflections on Longterm Grief recounts the author’s decade-long healing journey after the loss of her son, Dylan. She shares her experiences of grief, resilience, and the significance of community support, therapy, and self-reflection. Finding solace in nature and gratitude for…Read more

A close-up of a gray tabby cat sitting in the snow, with brown and black stripes and green eyes, surrounded by snow and branches, showcasing its striking features and inquisitive gaze, My Forever Son, Hold Onto Hope-Grief Comes to Stay
A tabby cat sitting against a snowy backdrop, showcasing its striking features and inquisitive gaze, My Forever Son, Hold Onto Hope-Grief Comes to Stay

Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide

Hold Onto Hope-Grief Comes to Stay

Hold Onto Hope-Grief Comes to Stay When you lose your child, there is nothingness, the descent into the abyss of losing not just your child, but also yourself Beth, Dylan’s Mom, My Forever Son Grief is Unfinished Others can come alongside us for awhile, but our journey into the deep, dark night must be our own. Here, we rally against the darkness, awaken our soul’s…Read more

A woman with shoulder-length hair, wearing a cozy sweater, sits at a desk, deeply focused on writing in a notebook with a pen, in a warmly lit room, embodying the healing power of journaling, My Forever Son, A Letter to My Son in Year Nine: Reflections on Lingering Grief
A woman engaged in reflective writing, embodying the healing power of journaling, My Forever Son, A Letter to My Son in Year Nine: Reflections on Lingering Grief

Reflections after losing a child to suicide

A Letter to My Son in Year Nine: Reflections on Lingering Grief

A Letter to My Son in Year Nine: Reflections on Lingering Grief Summary In A Letter to My Son In Year Nine: Reflections on Lingering Grief, a mother reflects on nine years of grief after losing her son to suicide. She writes a heartfelt letter to him, expressing her enduring pain and the struggle to…Read more

Close-up of blooming daffodils, featuring a white flower with ruffled edges and a bright orange trumpet among green leaves, symbolizing renewal and hope in the garden, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son, symbolizing renewal and hope in the garden, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son
Blooming daffodils symbolizing renewal and hope in the garden, My Forever Son, Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son

Grief

Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son ABOUT THIS POST: Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son offers an intimate look at the journals of the author after losing her son to suicide, capturing the raw emotions, struggles, and moments of clarity that have arisen throughout her journey. Through poignant reflections, the author…Read more

Close-up of delicate white flowers blooming on a tree branch, with a blurred green background, symbolizing new beginnings and hope, symbolizing hope and renewal in the midst of grief, My Forever Son, 3 Years of Grief: Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide
Delicate white flowers bloom, symbolizing hope and renewal in the midst of grief, My Forever Son, 3 Years of Grief: Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide

Healing

3 Years of Grief: Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide

3 Years of Grief: Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide Summary Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide: 3 Years of Grief and Glimpses of Hope explores the author’s personal journey of grief over three years after losing her son to suicide. It emphasizes the emotional struggle and the concept…Read more

Scenic view of a tranquil lake surrounded by evergreen forests and mountains under a clear blue sky, embodying peace and tranquility, My Forever Son, When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’
A serene view of a lake surrounded by lush greenery and majestic mountains, embodying peace and tranquility, My Forever Son, When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’

understanding suicide

When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’

When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ Summary When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ explores the complexities of suicide and includes a compassionate treatise written by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” challenging the notion that it is a choice. The treatise, “Ode…Read more

A close-up of a blooming white peony flower, featuring delicate petals and a bud next to it, set against lush green foliage, symbolizing hope and renewal in nature, complementing the themes of grief and healing explored in Beth Brown's reflections, My Forever Son, “Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss
A beautiful white peony in bloom, symbolizing hope and renewal in nature, complementing the themes of grief and healing explored in Beth Brown’s reflections, My Forever Son, “Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss

“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss Summary The poem “Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss by Beth Brown explores the profound connection between love and grief following the loss of her son to suicide. The poem emphasizes the author’s…Read more

A close-up view of a tree with golden leaves against a textured wall, capturing the beauty of nature during autumn, symbolizing the beauty and resilience found in nature and the journey of healing, My Forever Son, The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience
A majestic tree adorned with vibrant yellow leaves, symbolizing the beauty and resilience found in nature and the journey of healing, My Forever Son, The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience

Healing Grief

The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience

The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience Summary The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience explores the author’s journey of grief through the metaphor of a Magnolia tree’s cyclical seasons. The author uses photography to illustrate the parallels between nature’s cycles and the seasons of grief, finding hope and healing in…Read more

Close-up of blooming pink azalea flowers with green leaves in the background, symbolize hope and renewal, echoing themes of healing in the journey through grief, My Forever Son, Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers
Beautiful pink azalea flowers symbolize hope and renewal, echoing themes of healing in the journey through grief, My Forever Son, Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers

Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers

Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers Summary In Finding Hope in Nature’s Resilience Through Spring Flowers, the author finds solace and healing in nature’s resilience, particularly during spring, after losing her son to suicide. The cyclical nature of the seasons, with the promise of renewal and rebirth, mirrors the author’s journey through grief…Read more

A close-up of a blooming yellow rose with lush green leaves, set against a softly blurred background, symbolizes hope and renewal amidst the journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Finding Solace After Losing a Child to Suicide: “Build a Life of Love Around the Loss”
A vibrant yellow rose symbolizes hope and renewal amidst the journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Finding Solace After Losing a Child to Suicide: “Build a Life of Love Around the Loss”

Losing a Child to Suicide

Finding Solace After Losing a Child to Suicide: “Build a Life of Love Around the Loss”

Finding Solace After Losing a Child to Suicide: “Build a Life of Love Around the Loss” When we lose a loved one to suicide, it feels like we will never be the same. And in truth, we won’t be. The grief will always be there, but we can heal and begin to build a life…Read more

Close-up of vibrant autumn leaves in shades of orange and green, showcasing nature's transition in a garden setting, symbolizing the resilience and beauty found in nature amidst the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding the Unique Aspects of Suicide Grief
Colorful autumn leaves symbolizing the resilience and beauty found in nature amidst the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding the Unique Aspects of Suicide Grief

understanding suicide

Understanding the Unique Aspects of Suicide Grief

Understanding the Unique Aspects of Suicide Grief Summary Understanding the Unique Aspects of Suicide Grief explores the unique challenges of coping with suicide grief. The author, who lost her son to suicide, shares her personal experiences, her emotional journey, and provides resources for emotional support and understanding. The post includes a collection of articles and…Read more

A close-up view of a terracotta pot filled with vibrant red nasturtium flowers and green leaves, set against a soft-focus garden background, symbolizing resilience and beauty in nature, captured in a serene garden setting, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
A vibrant pot of flowering nasturtiums, symbolizing resilience and beauty in nature, captured in a serene garden setting, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

understanding suicide

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide Summary Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide provides a detailed description of and discussion of “Prolonged Grief Disorder,” “previously known as complicated grief, describes long-term mourning after loss, especially from suicide. Suicide grief is complicated by guilt, shame, and societal stigma, making it difficult to move through. While labeling…Read more

A young man with long, wavy hair stands looking down thoughtfully. He wears a light denim jacket over a red shirt, set against a soft-focus background of greenery and a gray sky, stands in a contemplative pose against a backdrop of muted skies, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide: Why the Pain Matters
A reflective young man with long hair, wearing a denim jacket and a red shirt, stands in a contemplative pose against a backdrop of muted skies, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide: Why the Pain Matters

understanding suicide

Understanding Suicide: Why the Pain Matters

Understanding Suicide: Why the Pain Matters Understanding Suicide: Why the Pain Matters by author Beth Brown explores the pain and grief surrounding suicide, emphasizing that it is not a conscious choice but a desperate attempt to escape unbearable suffering. Her article highlights current research into understanding suicide and suicidal thinking, personal stories shared by…Read more

A person with curly hair rests their head on a grave marker while gently placing a red rose on it, depicting a moment of grief and remembrance, featuring a rose laid on the tombstone, My Forever Son, Understanding the Pain of Suicide Loss
A moment of grief and reflection at a gravesite, featuring a rose laid on the tombstone, My Forever Son, Understanding the Pain of Suicide Loss

understanding suicide

Understanding the Pain of Suicide Loss

Understanding the Pain of Suicide Loss Summary The article “Understanding the Pain of Suicide Loss: “When Someone is Too Bruised to Be Touched” explores the profound grief and struggles faced by those left behind after a loved one dies by suicide. It features Father Ronald Rolheiser’s insightful…Read more

A young man sitting on a concrete ledge with a pensive expression, holding his head in one hand. The background features overgrown vegetation and scattered building materials, creating a somber atmosphere, reflecting the theme of grief and loss, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide Myths: Facts and Insights
A contemplative moment captured in black and white, reflecting the theme of grief and loss, My Forever Son, Understanding Suicide Myths: Facts and Insights

Suicide Facts and Statistics

Understanding Suicide Myths: Facts and Insights

Understanding Suicide Myths: Facts and Insights Summary “Understanding Suicide Myths: Facts and Insights” addresses misconceptions about suicide, emphasizing compassion and empathy. It highlights how cultural, social, and economic factors influence suicide rates and provides global statistics and expert insights to raise awareness and promote discussions on mental health struggles. The article urges support and understanding…Read more

Close-up of a hand writing on a piece of paper with a pen, capturing a moment of reflection or thought, capturing emotions during a journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Self-Blame and Guilt-I Couldn’t Save My Son
A person reflecting and writing, capturing emotions during a journey of grief and healing, My Forever Son, Self-Blame and Guilt-I Couldn’t Save My Son

Guilt

Self-Blame and Guilt-I Couldn’t Save My Son

Self-Blame and Guilt-I Couldn’t Save My Son Summary In “Self-Blame and Guilt: I Couldn’t Save My Son,” author Beth Brown shares her journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. She explores the heavy burden of self-blame and guilt that many parents endure after suicide loss of a child, grappling…Read more

A close-up view of multiple fallen leaves in shades of red and pink, with a focus on a prominent red leaf in the foreground, symbolizing the beauty of nature even in transitional seasons, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”
A vibrant display of red and purple leaves, symbolizing the beauty of nature even in transitional seasons, My Forever Son, Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling” Summary Beth Brown, a devoted mother who suffered the heartbreaking loss of her son to suicide, recounts her profound journey of healing through the power of poetry in her poignant blog, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide. In her deeply…Read more

Close-up of vibrant red and orange leaves on a plant, showcasing the beauty of autumn foliage, showcasing the beauty of nature as seasons change, My Forever Son, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief
Vibrant autumn leaves showcasing the beauty of nature as seasons change, My Forever Son, “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief

“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief Summary “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back” is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound guilt and sorrow parents experience after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the haunting questions of “What If?” and “Why…Read more

A full moon illuminated against a twilight sky, framed by silhouetted tree branches, showcasing a full moon framed by tree branches, symbolizing reflection and hope amidst grief, My Forever Son, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide
A serene night sky showcasing a full moon framed by tree branches, symbolizing reflection and hope amidst grief, My Forever Son, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide

“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem on Losing My Son to Suicide Summary “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Heartfelt Poem On Losing My Son to Suicide is a poem by Beth Brown that explores the profound grief and regret of losing a child to suicide. Through vivid imagery and heartfelt repetition, the…Read more

Close-up of vibrant purple petunias alongside budding hosta flowers, surrounded by lush green foliage, symbolizing hope and healing in nature, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
A vibrant display of purple flowers and lush green foliage, symbolizing hope and healing in nature, My Forever Son, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Poems about Losing a Child to Suicide

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing Summary Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a heartfelt collection of poems on love and loss that tenderly explores the profound pain of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her deeply personal journey through grief, illustrating how she…Read more

A peaceful garden scene featuring vibrant purple flowers blooming beside a serene pond, creating a tranquil natural landscape, symbolizing hope and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss
A serene garden scene with vibrant pink flowers blooming by a tranquil pond, symbolizing hope and renewal in nature, My Forever Son, Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Hope and Healing

Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss

Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss Summary In the article Matins: Reflections on Hope After Loss, author Beth Brown reflects on the journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. She describes the unpredictable nature of grief, the struggle to find joy after such a loss, and the ongoing process of…Read more

A close-up of a stone lion statue with a textured fur-like surface, sitting quietly amidst fallen leaves on a paved outdoor surface, perfect for reflecting on the themes of grief and healing, My Forever Son, I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide
A stone lion statue symbolizes strength and resilience, perfect for reflecting on the themes of grief and healing, My Forever Son, I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide

Hope and Healing

I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide

I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide Summary The blog “My Forever Son” explores the journey of grief and healing after losing a son to suicide. Through personal reflections, poetry, and music, the author shares insights and resources for grieving parents navigating similar experiences of love and loss. The…Read more

A close-up view of a pink peony flower bud, partially opened, surrounded by green leaves and a soft background, symbolizing renewal and resilience, My Forever Son, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss in Grief
A close-up view of a pink peony bud surrounded by lush green leaves, symbolizing renewal and resilience, My Forever Son, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss in Grief

Grief

From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss in Grief

From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss in Grief Summary The article “From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss in Grief” explores the author’s journey of grief and healing after losing her son to suicide. Through a magnet symbolizing the struggle between pain and hope, the author reflects on the possibility of finding…Read more

A cozy living room scene featuring a red coffee cup on a white saucer, accompanied by a small vase with white flowers and notebooks on a wooden table, perfect for moments of reflection, My Forever Son, Finding Beauty in Loss: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
A cozy scene featuring a red cup of coffee on a saucer, accompanied by a vase of flowers and a notebook, perfect for moments of reflection, My Forever Son, Finding Beauty in Loss: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing

Professional Resources

Online Directory for Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress

After A Suicide Resource Directory: Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress
http://www.personalgriefcoach.net
This online directory links people who are grieving after a suicide death to resources and information.

Alliance of Hope for Suicide Survivors
http://www.allianceofhope.org
This organization for survivors of suicide loss provides information sheets, a blog, and a community forum through which survivors can share with each other.

Friends for Survival
http://www.friendsforsurvival.org
This organization is for suicide loss survivors and professionals who work with them. It produces a monthly newsletter and runs the Suicide Loss Helpline (1-800-646-7322). It also published Pathways to Purpose and Hope, a guide to building a community-based suicide survivor support program.

HEARTBEAT: Grief Support Following Suicide
http://heartbeatsurvivorsaftersuicide.org
This organization has chapters providing support groups for survivors of suicide loss in Colorado and some other states. Its website provides information sheets for survivors and a leader’s guide on how to start a new chapter of HEARTBEAT.

Resources and Support Groups

Parents of Suicides and Friends & Families of Suicides (POS-FFOS)
http://www.pos-ffos.com
This website provides a public message board called Suicide Grief Support Forum, a listserv for parents, a separate listserv for others, and an online chat room for survivors of suicide loss.

Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS)
https://www.taps.org/suicide
This organization provides resources and programs for people grieving the loss of a loved one who died while serving in the U.S. armed forces or as a result of their service. It has special resources and programs for suicide loss survivors.

United Survivors
https://unitesurvivors.org/
This organization is a place where people who have experienced suicide loss, suicide attempts, and suicidal thoughts and feelings, and their friends and families, can connect to use their lived experience to advocate for policy, systems, and cultural change.

Professional Organizations

American Association of Suicidology
suicidology.org • (202) 237-2280
Promotes public awareness, education and training for professionals, and sponsors an annual Healing After Suicide conference for suicide loss survivors. In addition to the conference, they offer a coping with suicide grief handbook by Jeffrey Jackson. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

The Compassionate Friends
compassionatefriends.org • (877) 969-0010
Offers resources for families after the death of a child. They sponsor support groups, newsletters and online support groups throughout the country, as well as an annual national conference for bereaved families.

The Dougy Center
The National Center for Grieving Children & Families
dougy.org • (503) 775-5683
Publishes extensive resources for helping children and teens who are grieving a death including death by suicide. Resources include the “Children, Teens and Suicide Loss” booklet created in partnership with AFSP. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

Link’s National Resource Center for Suicide Prevention and Aftercare
thelink.org/nrc-for-suicide-prevention-aftercar • 404-256-2919
Dedicated to reaching out to those whose lives have been impacted by suicide and connecting them to available resources.

Tragedy Assistance Programs for Survivors (TAPS)
taps.org/suicide • (800) 959-TAPS (8277)
Provides comfort, care and resources to all those grieving the death of a military loved one through a national peer support network and connection to grief resources, all at no cost to surviving families and loved ones.

LOSS
losscs.org
Offers support groups, remembrance events, companioning, suicide postvention and prevention education, and training to other communities interested in developing or enhancing their suicide postvention and prevention efforts.

Online resources

Alliance of Hope
allianceofhope.org
Provides a 24/7 online forum for suicide loss survivors.

Help Guide
helpguide.org
Provides resources and tips for how to navigate the loss of someone to suicide.

Parents of Suicides (POS) – Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS)
pos-ffos.com
An internet community to connect parents, friends, and family that have lost someone to suicide.

SAVE: Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
save.org/programs/suicide-loss-support • (952) 946-7998
Hosts resources for suicide loss survivor including a support group database, newsletter, survivor conference and the Named Memorial Program, which offers a special way to honor your loved one.

Siblings Survivors of Suicide Loss
siblingsurvivors.com
Provides resources and a platform to connect with others that have lost a sibling to suicide.

Finding professional care and support

Find a mental health provider

Find a provider for prolonged grief

Find additional resources for marginalized communities

Crisis Services

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
988lifeline.org
Call or text 988 (press 1 for Veterans, 2 for Spanish, 3 for LGBTQ+ youth and young adults) or chat 988lifeline.org
A 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With crisis centers across the country, their mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential.

Crisis Text Line
crisistextline.org
Text TALK to 741-741 for English
Text AYUDA to 741-741 for Spanish
Provides free, text-based mental health support and crisis intervention by empowering a community of trained volunteers to support people in their moments of need, 24/7.

Parents of Suicides: An Online Support Group for Parents Who Lose a Child to Suicide

A close-up of a white peony flower surrounded by green leaves, symbolizing beauty and hope, My Forever Son
A beautiful blooming peony symbolizing hope and renewal amidst grief, My Forever Son

Suicide is the anchor point on a continuum of suicidal thoughts & behaviors. This continuum is one that ranges from risk-taking behaviors at one end, extends through different degrees & types of suicidal thinking, & ends with suicide attempts and suicide.  

Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, National Library of Medicine

Parents of Suicides is a dedicated international online closed email group where parents who have lost a child to suicide come together to offer support, hope, and healing. Join a Community of Understanding. Parents of Suicides (PoS) provides a safe space for sharing experiences, coping mechanisms, and emotional support. You are not alone in this journey. Together, we can find strength and solace.

A close-up of white roses with green leaves in a natural outdoor setting, symbolizing remembrance and hope, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents' Resource
A close-up of white roses surrounded by lush green leaves, symbolizing remembrance and hope, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents’ Resource

Support and Resources for Grieving Parents of Suicide Loss

Support Groups

A stack of books related to mental health and suicide prevention placed on a wooden table, with a blue mug and green plants in the background, My Forever Son, Finding Support After Losing a Child to Suicide
A collection of books focused on understanding grief, suicide, and mental health support, My Forever Son, Finding Support After Losing a Child to Suicide

Books for Understanding Suicide And Mental Health

An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness
Kay Redfield Jamison, Ph.D., Alfred A. Knopf, 1995. In this memoir, an international authority on Manic Depression (Bipolar Disorder describes her own struggle since adolescence with the disorder, and how it has shaped her life.

Darkness Visible
William Styron, Random House, 1990. A powerful and moving first-hand account of what depression feels like to the sufferer.

Devastating Losses: How Parents Cope with the Death of a Child to Suicide or Drugs
William Feigelman, Ph.D., John Jordan, Ph.D., John McIntosh, Ph.D., Beverly Feigelman, LCSW, Springer Publishing, 2012. This book provides useful avenues for future research on suicide loss and offers new insights into the grief process that follows the death of a child, both in the short term and years after a loss.  Please note that, given its academic tone, the book is better suited to clinicians and educators than to recently bereaved lay readers.

Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide
Kay Redfield Jamison, Ph.D., Alfred A. Knopf, 1999. Kay Redfield Jamison’s in-depth psychological and scientific exploration of suicide traces the network of reasons underlying suicide, including the factors that interact to cause suicide, and outlines the evolving treatments available through modern medicine.

The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression
Andrew Solomon, Scribner, 2001.Winner of the National Book Award, this book shares the author’s story of chronic depression, and places depression in a broader social context.

Why People Die by Suicide
Thomas Joiner, Ph.D., Harvard University Press, 2005.
Drawing on extensive clinical and epidemiological evidence, as well as personal experience, the author, who lost his father to suicide, identifies three factors that mark those most at risk of considering, attempting, or dying by suicide.

Book Recommendation: ‘A Handbook for Coping with Suicide Grief’ by Jeffrey Jackson, providing support for survivors of suicide loss, My Forever Son

Cover of a handbook titled 'A handbook for coping with suicide grief' by Jeffrey Jackson, featuring illustrations of people and greenery, My Forever Son
Book Recommendation: ‘A Handbook for Coping with Suicide Grief’ by Jeffrey Jackson, providing support for survivors of suicide loss, My Forever Son
A close-up of a vibrant red rose with droplets of water on its petals, accompanied by the title 'Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide' by Beth Brown,
Book cover of ‘Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide‘ by Beth Brown, featuring a vibrant rose, symbolizing remembrance and hope, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents’ Resource

Books 

  • Beal, Karyl Chastain (2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018). Faces of Suicide, Volumes One to Five.
  • Brown, Beth (2023) Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide 
  • Cacciatore, Joanne (2017). Bearing the Unbearable. Wisdom Publications.
  • Clark, Ann (2020). Gone to Suicide. A mom’s truth on heartbreak, transformation and prevention. Iuniverse.
  • Collins, Eileen Vorbach (2023). Love in the Archives. a patchwork of true stories about suicide loss. Apprentice House Press.
  • Cross, Tracey (2013). Suicide among gifted children and adolescents. Understanding the suicidal mind. Prufrock Press.
  • Dougy Center, The (2001). After a Suicide: An Activity Book for Grieving Kids. Dougy Center.
  • Estes, Clarissa Pinkola (1988). The Faithful Gardener. HarperCollinsSanFrancisco.
  • Fine, Carla (1997). No Time to Say Goodbye. Surviving the suicide of a loved one. Broadway Books.
  • Heilmann, Lena M.Q. (2019). Still with Us. Voices of Sibling Suicide Loss Survivors. BDI Publishers.
  • Hickman, Martha Whitmore (1994). Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief. William Morrow Paperbacks
  • Jamison, Kay Redfield (2000). Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide. Vintage.
  • Johnson, Julie Tallard (1994). Hidden Victims, Hidden Healers. An eight-stage healing process for families and friends of the mentally ill. Pema Publications.
  • Joiner, Thomas (2005). Why People Die by Suicide. Harvard University Press
  • Joiner, Thomas (2010). Myths About Suicide. Harvard University Press.
  • Kushner, Harold S. (2004). When Bad Things Happen to Good People. Anchor Books
  • O’Connor, Mary-Francis (2022). The Grieving Brain. HarperOne.
  • Rasmussen, Christina (2019). Second Firsts. Hay House Inc.
  • Shapiro, Larry (2020). Brain Pain. Giving insight to children who have lost a family member or a loved one to suicide. Safe Haven Books.
  • Wickersham, Julie (2009). The Suicide Index: Putting My Father’s Death in Order. Mariner Books.

Therapies

A woman in a brown coat kneels beside a grave, visibly emotional, with a vase of red and white flowers placed on the gravestone that reads 'SON.' The background shows a cemetery with multiple gravestones, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents' Resource
A grieving parent visits their child’s grave, reflecting on loss and remembrance, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents’ Resource

Memorial Sites

red rose in full bloom close up

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By Beth Brown

Musician. Writer. Literary Connoisseur. Always writing, scribbling poetry, turning feelings into words. "Break my heart even further" can't ever be done, for I lost my heart the night I lost my son. Come find me writing at My Forever Son: Grief, Hope, and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide.

At the whim of Most Beloved Cat, I write as she tattles on the garden cats. Find Most Beloved Cat sharing her stories at Gardens at Effingham: Where Cats Tell the Tales

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