
Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son
ABOUT THIS POST: Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son offers an intimate look at the journals of the author after losing her son to suicide, capturing the raw emotions, struggles, and moments of clarity that have arisen throughout her journey.
Through poignant reflections, the author shares her evolving understanding of grief, the impact it has had on her daily life, and the ways she has sought healing and community support.
Each journal entry in Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son serves as a testament to her resilience, illustrating not only the depth of her pain but also the moments of hope that have emerged as she learns to navigate a world forever changed by loss.
My Forever Son

My Forever Son explores the profound grief, hope, and healing that follow the tragedy of losing a child to suicide.
My Forever Son dovetails the author’s journey of descending into deep grief, searching for hope, and finding healing along the way.

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing After Losing a Child
Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a poignant collection of poems by Beth Brown that explores the intense pain of losing a child to suicide. Through her personal journey of grief and healing, Brown offers comfort to readers experiencing similar heartaches. This collection not only delves into the complexities of grief with heartfelt verses but also illuminates paths to hope and resilience.
The author’s authentic and vulnerable expressions invite reflection on shared experiences of loss. Ultimately, Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing serves as a touching reminder of love’s enduring strength and the essential nature of healing. Each poem gently guides readers through their grief, providing solace and understanding amidst profound sorrow.
FIND HOPE HERE: POETIC REFLECTIONS. ON GRIEF AND HEALING
Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message
Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message Summary Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message explores the profound grief and regret of losing a child to suicide through the poem, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon,” by author Beth Brown. Through vivid imagery and heartfelt repetition, the poem captures the enduring love…
“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss
“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss Summary “Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound grief and longing experienced after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the author’s personal journey of navigating life without her son, Dylan, and…
Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis
Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis Summary Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis by Beth Brown explores the profound connection between love and grief following the loss of her son to suicide. The poem emphasizes the author’s refusal to change her narrative of grief, asserting…
Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love” Poem
Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem Summary Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem highlights the powerful poem “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” which explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. It delves…
“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: Poem on Child Loss
“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide is a heartfelt piece on losing a child to suicide that explores the profound grief and longing experienced after such a tragic loss. The…
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on Grieving a Child’s Suicide
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on the Devastating Loss of a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” in the post, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on Grieving a Child’s Suicide explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth…
Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”
Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem, “He Left Too Soon” Summary Beth Brown’s poignant poem, “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere -Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon,” skillfully intertwines the sorrow stemming from the loss of her son to suicide with the tumult wrought by a powerful Derecho storm that occurred on the day…
“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents
Sorrow Buried in Love: A Poem for Grieving Parents Summary “Sorrow Buried in Love: A Poem for Grieving Parents” explores the profound grief and complex emotions experienced by parents who have lost a child to suicide. The poem emphasizes the importance of honoring the child’s memory while navigating the challenging path of healing, highlighting that…
“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
“He Left Too Soon, Lifting Life from June” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow Summary “He Left Too Soon” is a poem about the profound sorrow and anguish of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her personal experience of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. Through her writing,…
The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy
The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy Summary The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy features the grief poem, “Beat Still My Heart,”a powerful elegy that uses shipwreck imagery to convey the grief of losing a child to suicide. The grief poem, written by Beth Brown, explores…
When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’
When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ Summary When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ unravels the profound complexities surrounding suicide, featuring an impactful poem and a heartfelt treatise by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand.” This poignant article and poetic reflection encourage readers…
“Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope
“Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope Summary “Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope addresses grieving parents who have suffered the unimaginable loss of a child to suicide. It underscores the profound importance of honoring their child’s memory through meaningful rituals, sharing heartfelt stories, and engaging in advocacy events that…
Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”
Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling” Summary Beth Brown, a devoted mother who suffered the heartbreaking loss of her son to suicide, recounts her profound journey of healing through the power of poetry in her poignant blog, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide. In her deeply…
“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief
‘That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back’: Poem on Guilt in Grief Summary “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back” is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound guilt and sorrow parents experience after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the haunting questions of “What If?” and “Why…
“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss
“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss Summary “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss depicts a deeply personal and emotional journey of losing a child to suicide. The author effectively conveys the profound impact of grief through heartfelt words and metaphors. The…
Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss
Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss Summary “Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil”: A Poem of Love and Loss is a heartfelt reflection on the themes of love and loss, born from the deep and painful grief of the author following the heartbreaking…
“I Will Seek Until I Find You” Poem: A Journey Through Grief
“I Will Seek Until I Find You” Poem: A Journey Through Grief Summary “I Will Seek Until I Find You” Poem: A Journey Through Grief explores the profound journey of grief after losing a child to suicide. It captures complex emotions, from sorrow to enduring love, while inviting readers to navigate their own paths of…
“Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Loss
“Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide Summary “Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Loss conveys a powerful message of hope for parents grieving a child’s suicide. Acknowledging the profound sorrow of loss and the traumatic grief of losing a child to suicide,…

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources
A source of support, Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources provides comfort to grieving parents and offers hope for healing. The article discusses the challenges of grief and shares insights into the emotional struggles after such a loss. With helpful advice and personal stories, the article helps parents cope with feelings of anger, confusion, and sadness, guiding them through their grief. Ultimately, it serves as a companion, helping parents build strength and resilience as they learn to live with their grief, one day at a time.

Navigating Guilt in Grief: A Parent’s Guide
Navigating Guilt in Grief: A Parent’s Guide explores the complex emotions parents experience after losing a child to suicide, including grief and guilt. Through personal stories and impactful quotes, it provides comfort and validation, reminding parents they are not alone. The guide addresses how societal expectations can intensify these feelings and offers practical advice to help parents connect and understand their emotions as they work through their healing journey.

Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide
Coping with Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide offers a compassionate exploration of the emotions parents face after losing a child to suicide. This heartfelt post provides understanding and guidance for grieving families, featuring quotes from mental health professionals and bereaved parents, as well as crucial resources like hotlines and support groups. It emphasizes that losing a child to suicide does not mean you failed as a parent, as mental health issues and risk factors are often beyond your control. Remember, your child’s decision was driven by their own pain, not a desire to hurt you.
Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son
5 Years, Infinite Tears
Losing Dylan has changed everything. Yes, I am to the point of feeling the highs of life again, though never so sweetly as to silence the ache of my heart that beats still for my son.
Beth Brown, Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son, My Forever Son

5 Years After Losing My Son: A Lesser Joy and A Deeper Sorrow
This dark, incessant droning on of days, months, years, and most sadly of all, a lifetime, more so carve in us (should we choose and choose we must, for grief is not so clearly delineated in its outcome), a strange capacity to integrate both a lesser joy and a deeper sorrow.
Beth Brown, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss, My Forever Son
Navigating Grief: 5 Years, Infinite Tears
I am 5 years, 1 month, and 14 days into this journey that though, not chosen, has become the construct of my life.
5 Years. 1 Month. 14 Days. And still counting.
My life is a paradox. I live in time that marches obediently along in increments of seconds, minutes, hours, and days, calendar years. I know it is 2017, late summer in the Midwest, and a perfectly temperate day; and yet, and yet, all of me is not, in fact, here.
I live undone and yet somehow caught still living, the ache between my limbs, my joints, tissues, and fibers where yet still, I am Dylan’s mom.
But it’s through a haze: A blurring of what is and what is not; of what is here and what is not; a sense and grounding of what is tangible and what is not; that I now navigate. I still want to believe.

Navigating Grief: 5 Years After Losing My Son
I feel I should be writing about hope, that my life has been redeemed, reclaimed, re-invented, renewed, re-invigorated, resilient. But just for today, I don’t feel resilient. Just for today, I feel more in the vapors of a life I used to live. A life where I felt happy. A life rich and full of meaning. A life without ghost memories. Ghost Memories Swirl Everywhere now.
Perhaps reeling from a loss so catastrophic that all one can do is scream to sky, to stars, to sun–to wherever forever is, to where forever is out of reach, forever again.
Beth Brown, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss, My Forever Son

Navigating Grief at 5 Years
And so I wonder, where from now this?
Beth Brown, My Forever Son
For here now, I stay, linger, and yet to what cause?
I have passed through so much, though in the end, I wind up where I was
5 years, 1 month, and 14 days ago.
Losing my son to suicide.
Poetic Thoughts: For Here Now I Stay
Reflections on Grief at 5 Years
And so Where from Here?
For here now, I stay
For here now, I breathe your love
For here now, I am with you always
So many days, so much time having passed--
And yet, still as it has been, these past 5 years.
It is sometimes as if I am in some kind of fog, a thick can't-see-clear kind of fog, a fog where I don't know if what I am and what I see is real.
Were you? Are you? Where are you?
Beth Brown, For Here Now, I Stay, My Forever Son,

Reflections on Grief at 5 Years: For Here Now, I Stay
Deep Reflections from My Journals
I do not know why time passes this quickly now. Yes, when we are young, the world is ours, old people are static and staid, our moms and dads are just that—moms and dads. I think with familiarity we miss the gradual stripping away of our youth years, and frankly, in youth, we are so inward-turned that it’s difficult if not impossible to usher forth compassion and awareness towards others, especially those from whom we see ourselves as being most far apart.
Change is inevitable. Death comes. Tragedy besets us. And really, and this I only realize in the hindsight of the wake of Dylan’s suicide, our lives are much more about sorrow–our response to enormous loss and impossible circumstances–than our capacity and ability to feel and to cultivate joy. How easy it is, in the moment, to feel exhilarated and high on wings of flight that sail only blue skies drenched in sun.
Stars cover us with a darkness whose duration we cannot know
But storms come what will, torrents of rain, ice, and hail pelt us from all angles, and skies black as nights without stars cover us with a darkness whose duration we cannot know. There is no presumed joy, though those around us want to garner false belief in this when we travel such dark skies.

The Deeper the Sorrow, the Greater the Love
5 Years of Grief and Healing
How’s it go? The deeper the sorrow, the greater the love. Yes, but love stripped violently from our hands, touch, hearts, bodies, lives always casts shadows that will forever travel with us. Our bleakest nights do not bring greater capacity to feel joy, to feel the warmth of the sun, to see in color.
This dark, incessant droning on of days, months, years, and most sadly of all, a lifetime, more so carve in us (should we choose and choose we must, for grief is not so clearly delineated in its outcome), a strange capacity to integrate both a lesser joy and a deep sorrow.
Losing Dylan has changed everything. Yes, I am to the point of feeling the highs of life again, though never so sweetly as to silence the ache of my heart that beats still for my son.
Beth Brown, Author

About the Author
Beth Brown is a writer, educator, and bereaved mother who shares her journey of healing after losing her only son, Dylan, to suicide. Through poetry, essays, and her blog My Forever Son, Beth offers comfort and hope to others navigating grief, honoring the enduring bond between parent and child and celebrating the small joys that illuminate the path toward healing.
Meet the Author: Writing Through the Abyss
by Beth Brown
There are places that cannot be mapped, only entered—terrains of loss where language falters and the heart, stripped of its certainties, must learn to speak again. I am Beth Brown, a mother whose son, Dylan, died by suicide at twenty. My life, once measured by the ordinary rhythms of teaching literature and nurturing a child, was pierced in two: before and after. In the aftermath, I found myself wandering a wilderness where time bent, memory ached, and the world’s colors dimmed to the hush of grief.
On baby’s breath and angel wings,
You bring me love yet still,
— “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”
I did not choose to become a chronicler of sorrow, but grief, relentless and unbidden, pressed its ink into my hands. I wrote because I could not bear the silence. I wrote because the ache demanded witness. In poetry, I found a way to hold both the weight of absence and the persistence of love—a language for the unspeakable, a vessel for memory, a place where my son’s name could still be spoken.
He left too soon,
Lifting life from June,
Casting torrents of rain.
— “He Left Too Soon”
There are nights when the world tilts, and I am returned to the moment of loss, the fracture that remade me. Yet even in the deepest dark, I have learned to listen for the faint music of hope, the pulse of love that endures beyond death.
Beat still my heart,
Beat still my mind,
Weary though thou art,
Carry his love along with thine,
Though heavy on thy shoulders
Crost fields throughout all time.
— “Beat Still My Heart”
My poems are not answers. They are offerings—fragments of a life lived in the shadow of absence, pieced together with longing and the fierce, unyielding devotion of a mother’s heart. They are the record of a journey through the labyrinth of grief, where each turn reveals both the ache of what is lost and the quiet radiance of what remains.
My child sleeps in a cradle of stars,
Gently rocked by the moon
Lullabies in his heart,
Heavens in galaxies swirl round to the sound
Of a mother and child’s love beating on.
Meteor showers, on the darkest of nights,
Bring comfort and joy to my child’s delight,
Aurora Borealis tints sky blue and green,
Where my child remembers his mother in dreams.
–“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”
There are questions that haunt the bereaved: Could I have known? Could I have saved you? The mind circles these unanswerable riddles, but the heart, battered and tender, learns to rest in the mystery.
I’d have reached right in to your dark night’s soul—
I would have held on, I would have clutched you,
I would have never let you go
But you told me “Mom I love you”
Oh my child, if I’d only known.
— “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”
In the landscape of loss, I have discovered that love is not diminished by death. It is transformed—becoming both ache and solace, shadow and light, the filament that binds the living to the lost.
Body, mind, soul, rough and ragged,
Weeping tears falling still throughout time,
Carrying weight of mourning and grieving
Falling broken when thou wert mine.
— “Beat Still My Heart”
I write for those who walk this wilderness with me—for the mothers and fathers, siblings and friends, whose lives have been marked by the unthinkable. My hope is that in these poems, you will find not only the echo of your own sorrow, but also the quiet assurance that you are not alone.
Starlight for a mobile twinkling ‘ere so bright,
To remember his mother that darkest of nights,
When slipped he from her grasp and fell through this earth,
Tumbling still planets, sun, folding time in rebirth.
— “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”
That we might understand we cannot separate mental illness from physical illness and that try as we might, we cannot see inside another’s pain.
–“Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand”
And how my heart keeps on beating
Is a mystery to all,
For without you beside me
Through life’s depth I crawl.
I live now life backwards
My heart beating in time,
To the life that we lived
When you, child, were mine.
Try as I might
I can’t seem to live,
For my dreams all belonged,
To your future forward lived.
If you have come here searching for words to companion your grief, I welcome you. My poetry is not a map, but a lantern—casting light on the path we walk, together and alone, toward a horizon where love, undiminished, endures.
But boughs break and love falls through the cracks in the earth,
And the centre can’t hold when orbits, slung far, break their girth,
Gravitational interference, passing stars in the night,
Jetting orbs, falling stars in a moonless sky.
— “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”
Grief is wild—untamed, unending, and full of shadows. Yet within its depths, I have found moments of light: a memory, a poem, the gentle rustle of leaves, the warmth of a cup of tea. My words are both ache and love, a testament that even in the deepest sorrow, we can find meaning, connection, and—sometimes—hope. Through poetry, I reach for my son and for all who walk this path. If you find yourself here, know that you are not alone, and that love—like poetry—endures.
If you wish to read more, my collection, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide is available on Amazon Kindle. and many other reflections await you at myforeverson.com.
Bury My Heart
The Story of My Forever Son

What Happened? The Backstory to My Forever Son: A Mother’s Grief
I started this blog, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide in 2015, three years into my journey of grief. You can read more about what happened here: The Backstory to My Forever Son: A Mother’s Grief recounts the author’s harrowing experience of losing her son to suicide. Her story highlights her grief, guilt, and the healing power of writing, especially through works like the “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” poem: reflections on love and loss. The blog “My Forever Son” came about as a way for the author to work through this devastating grief that follows the loss of a child to suicide. My Forever Son blog serves as a platform for sharing experiences and finding healing and solace in community.

Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing offers a heartfelt collection of poems that deeply resonate with the profound sorrow of parents who have experienced the unimaginable pain of losing a child to suicide. These poignant verses navigate the intense emotions of this tragic loss, beautifully capturing the stages of grief while gently guiding readers towards hope and healing on their journey through grief.

The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience
The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience, explores the author’s journey of grief through the metaphor of a Magnolia tree’s cyclical seasons. The author uses photography to illustrate the parallels between nature’s cycles and the seasons of grief, finding hope and healing in writing, gardening, and nature’s resilience. The Magnolia tree’s resilience symbolizes renewal and the possibility of finding joy again despite profound heartbreak. After reflections on nature’s resilience, the author reflects on grief and healing (echoes of joy and shadows of loss) after losing her son to suicide.

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources
Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources offers an extensive collection of resources aimed at helping parents understand the complexities of suicide to help with their profound grief. This invaluable guide not only provides insights but also connects parents with supportive communities, fostering a sense of belonging and emphasizing gentle pathways to hope and healing during such a heartbreaking time.

Navigating Guilt in Grief: A Parent’s Guide
Navigating Guilt in Grief: A Parent’s Guide offers a gentle and understanding perspective on the complex emotions that emerge after the devastating loss of a loved one through suicide, particularly from the vantage point of parents.This guide thoughtfully addresses the overwhelming and often contradictory feelings of grief, guilt, and sorrow that can envelop parents navigating such profound heartache.

Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents
Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide: A Guide for Parents gently supports parents navigating the profound sorrow of losing a child to suicide. This heartfelt article acknowledges the intense grief that such a tragedy brings and offers compassionate guidance on finding a way forward. The healing strategies shared emphasize self-care and the importance of seeking professional help, while inviting parents to connect with others who understand their pain.

Carrying Ache and Love: Healing Longterm Grief in Suicide Loss
I have shared my grief journey on this blog, My Forever Son, reflecting on those painful early years and sharing glimmers of hope along the way. Through sleepless nights and tears, I found that my deep love for my son sustains me through his absence.
Carrying both ache and love after losing my son to suicide has been the crux of my grief journey these past 12 years. I share insights into healing from deep grief in the article, Carrying Ache and Love: Healing Longterm Grief in Suicide Loss, where ache for his absence and love for my son walk together in my heart. Holding hands, one is never without the other, but ache and love have carried me—and carry me still.

When Love Isn’t Enough: “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand”
When Love Isn’t Enough: “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,”explores the complexities of suicide and includes a compassionate treatise written by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” challenging the notion that it is a choice. The treatise, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” emphasizes the inevitability of death, regardless of the cause, and the limitations of love in preventing it. The author of the treatise “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand” and this article, “When Love Isn’t Enough,” Beth Brown shares her personal journey of grief after losing her son to suicide, finding solace in writing and nature photography.
Meet Dylan, My Forever Son

Twenty Years of Love: Dylan
“Twenty Years of Love: Dylan” offers a poignant exploration of grief and loss, weaving together cherished memories and reflections on Dylan’s life. The emotional resonance of this piece is deeply felt, beautifully portraying both the love and sorrow that the author carries in their heart. The thoughtful inclusion of links to further readings about Dylan and resources for support is a compassionate touch that adds immense value to those who may be navigating similar journeys.

Walking Through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide
Walking through Shadows: Surviving the Unthinkable Loss of a Child to Suicide offers a deeply moving and heartfelt narrative that illuminates the unimaginable pain of losing a child to suicide. The personal stories shared create a sincere and unfiltered glimpse into the heavy journey of grief and the gradual path toward healing. Through poignant reflections and a poetic exploration on grief, the author navigates the chaotic emotions that accompany such a catastrophic event, revealing both the struggles and the moments of unexpected solace that can emerge even in the darkest times.

I Want It All Back: Remembering Dylan, My Forever Son
I Want It All Back: Remembering Dylan, My Forever Son lovingly encapsulates the profound heartache and cherished memories tied to the author’s beloved son, Dylan. Through heartfelt imagery and poignant personal stories, it invites readers to share in an emotional journey that resonates deeply, fostering a compassionate understanding of loss and love.

I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide
I Want to Believe: Searching for Hope After Losing My Son to Suicide is a heartfelt collection of personal reflections and cherished memories that navigates the profound journey of grief and hope following the heartbreaking loss of a son to suicide. The rawness of the emotions is deeply felt, drawing readers into a shared space of empathy. Through vivid descriptions and nostalgic elements, the work evokes a sense of connection and understanding, while the stunning images inspire hope and healing amidst the sorrow.

Dylan: Forever Loved and Remembered in Our Hearts
Dylan: Forever Loved and Remembered in Our Hearts invites readers into the heart/h-wrenching yet beautifully profound journey of a mother’s grief after the devastating loss of her beloved 20-year-old son, Dylan, who tragically died by suicide. Through a heartfelt collection of original poems and personal reflections, she courageously shares the painful complexities of her sorrow, the small moments of hope that emerged, and her ongoing path toward healing.
Heartfelt Stories and Poems of Love and Loss

“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide delves into the deep, heart-wrenching sorrow of losing a child to suicide. This poignant piece not only articulates the immense pain of such a loss but also provides vital resources to navigate the challenging journey of grief. With tender personal reflections and thoughtful coping strategies, the post and poem, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” serves as a compassionate companion for those who are enduring similar heartaches.

A Grandmother’s Love Held Together the Family Table
A Grandmother’s Love Held Together the Family Table chronicles a family’s journey through the loss of their beloved son, Dylan. This tragedy alters their connections, turning a joyful gathering space into one of reflection. The narrative captures the struggle between despair and acceptance, underscoring love’s enduring power amidst heartache. In honoring Dylan’s memory, they find unexpected joy in their grief, illustrating the resilience of the human spirit in the face of loss.

Grandparents’ Double Grief: Losing a Grandchild to Suicide
Grandparents’ Double Grief: Losing a Grandchild to Suicide gently delves into the profound and heart-wrenching sorrow experienced by grandparents who endure the unimaginable loss of their grandchild. This painful journey envelops them in a dual mourning, as they grieve not only the precious life that is gone but also the shattered dreams and cherished memories that will sorrowfully remain unrealized for their own child, the grieving parent.

Memorial Day: A Mother’s Reflection on Loss, Love, and Unbearable Tragedy
Memorial Day: A Mother’s Reflection on Loss, Love, and Unbearable Tragedy beautifully captures the deep sorrow and unwavering love a mother feels for her son. The author bravely shares her heartfelt journey, navigating the immense pain and heartbreak tied to her son’s fourth suicide attempt on Memorial Day. Through her poignant narrative, she reveals the complex layers of a mother’s grief, intricately woven with fleeting moments of hope that resonate powerfully with anyone who is facing loss.

“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss
“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay” A Poem on Suicide Loss explores the profound sorrow a parent endures after losing a child to suicide. It addresses themes of grief and guilt, highlighting the heavy shadow such a tragedy casts on life. This poignant narrative captures a parent’s transformative journey in the wake of their child’s absence, revealing emotions of shame while confronting societal stigma surrounding suicide. With compassion and insight, the poem resonates with anyone who has faced similar heart-wrenching experiences.

11 Years After Suicide Loss: I Still Want to Believe
11 Years After Suicide Loss: I Still Want to Believe powerfully conveys the depths of my unyielding grief and a relentless yearning for my beloved son, Dylan, whose vibrant spirit was tragically stolen by suicide eleven heart-wrenching years ago at merely twenty. As my only child, his absence has carved an immense void in my soul, reshaping every facet of my life while perpetually stirring the cherished memories of the beautiful moments we once savored together.
Healing Words: Download 3 Compassionate Poems for Coping with the Loss of a Child


Healing Through Poetry: Grieving a Child’s Loss to Suicide
Healing Through Poetry: Grieving a Child’s Loss to Suicide explores the challenging journey of healing after the heartbreaking loss of a child to suicide. Heartfelt poems and evocative visuals create a soothing experience, inviting readers to connect with the deep emotions in each verse. This blend of poetry and photography from the author’s gardens fosters an emotional bond, offering comfort to those with similar experiences while encouraging them to acknowledge their pain, cherish memories, and seek healing amid despair.
He Left Too Soon
He left too soon—
Lifting life from June,
Casting torrents of rain
His absence—
Breath of pain whose exhale can only bring
Heart heaving, this beating of tears
Breaking loose—
All hell in earth's upturned rupture,
Death shoveling shadows over me
As I bend to lay flowers on his name—
Inscribed and bronzed,
A permanence come to stay
My love laced now with pain—
Standing over my son's grave,
Death's Derecho come to stay in my shadow.
Beth Brown, copyright 2021, "He Left Too Soon" Poem: A Mother's Deep Sorrow
Explore the compelling tale that inspired the poem, "He Left too Soon," here: Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere - Grief Poem "He Left Too Soon"
“He Left Too Soon”: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow “He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow is a poignant poem that bravely addresses the profound sorrow and anguish that comes with losing a beloved child to suicide. The poem aims to express the deep and complex emotions of grief, loss, and yearning, capturing the overwhelming turmoil that families face during such an unimaginable tragedy. The inspiration for the poem, “He Left Too Soon,” delves into the profound depths of early, acute grief following the heartbreaking loss of my son to suicide. This piece encapsulates themes of grief, mourning, remembrance, and the enduring love that persists even in the face of overwhelming sorrow.

Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem: “He Left Too Soon”
Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem: “He Left Too Soon” skillfully intertwines the sorrow stemming from the loss of her son to suicide with the tumult wrought by a powerful Derecho storm that occurred on the day of his funeral. Included in her publication, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide, the poem that was inspired by the Derecho, “He Left Too Soon,” explores the profound grief and emotional turmoil she experienced. Through her eloquent writing, Brown aspires to offer solace to those enduring similar tragedies, thereby shedding light on the fragility of life and the enduring strength of love amidst sorrow.

“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: Grieving a Child’s Suicide
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” Poem: Grieving a Child’s Suicide explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, reflects on the painful memories of her son Dylan’s life, his love for music, and the helplessness she felt in his final days. The poem “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” juxtaposes the beauty of Dylan’s childhood memories with the devastating reality of his tragic end.
Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon (excerpt)
But oh my son, if I’d only known
I’d have reached right in to your dark night’s soul–
I would have held on,
I would have clutched you,
I would have never let you go
But you told me
“Mom I love you”
Oh my child, if I’d only known.
Beth Brown, excerpt from "Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon": A Poem About Losing a Child to Suicide
“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide
“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide captures the profound sorrow of losing a child to suicide. Through vivid imagery, it honors the enduring love between parent and child, providing solace and hope for reunion. The poem is a poignant tribute to Brown’s son, Dylan, where the author remembers her son’s growing-up years, both cherished memories and moments where “If I’d Only Known” echo in her refrain. A powerful poem for parents who have lost a child to suicide.

The Emotional Depth of “Beat Still My Heart”: A Powerful Elegy
The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy explores the deep emotional journey of losing a child to suicide. This poignant reflection through poetry captures the sorrow and despair of such a loss, blending personal experiences with universal themes of love and remembrance.The author navigates grief with verses that resonate, inviting readers to confront raw emotions and unanswered questions. Vivid imagery of a shipwreck in a storm encapsulates the unbearable loss, making the elegy a powerful tribute to a tragic experience.

“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents
“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents explores the heart-wrenching journey of a parent grappling with the profound loss of a child to suicide. While friends and family often offer encouragement towards healing, those who have walked this painful path understand how overwhelming these expectations can be. Moving forward is not just about progressing in life; it also involves cherishing and carrying our child’s memory within us, honoring their presence in all we do.

“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss
Bury My Heart: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss is a poignant poem that captures the deep sorrow of losing a child, an agonizing experience that many parents fear but few can truly comprehend until faced with such a heartbreaking reality. It weaves themes of grief, hope, and healing into a tapestry of emotions, allowing readers to navigate their own journeys of despair and recovery. The poem provides not only an outlet for those grappling with this unimaginable pain but also serves as a powerful reminder that they are not alone in their struggles.

“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow is a deeply moving poem that captures the profound feelings of early, acute grief that follow the unimaginable loss of a child to the heartbreaking tragedy of suicide. The evocative verses resonate with the themes of grief, mourning, and loss, portraying the complex emotions that envelop a mother’s heart in such a profoundly difficult time.

Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”
Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling“ shares a profoundly personal journey through the heart-wrenching experience of grief and guilt following the tragic loss of a child to suicide, featuring the poignant poem “Still from Sky I’m Falling.” Interlacing the deep sorrow of loss with the haunting feelings of remorse, the author creates a poem deep with heartfelt reflections that offer a glimpse into the overwhelming emotional struggle and the fragile path towards healing that follow such an unimaginable tragedy.

“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss
“Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay”: A Poem on Suicide Loss examines the profound connection between love and grief experienced after the heartbreaking loss of her son to suicide. The poem beautifully conveys the author’s steadfast commitment to honor her journey of grief, affirming her right to experience her emotions fully and illustrating the deep intertwining of love and sorrow. Through evocative imagery, “Shaped by Love and This Grief Come to Stay” poignantly expresses the complicated feelings that accompany such a significant and painful loss.
If only a mother’s love could have saved you,
Could have heard in the dark your heart’s cry,
She could have saved you yet both together,
Falling stars in a moonless sky.
Beth Brown, “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: A Poem on Grieving a Child's Suicide, My Forever Son
“If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You”: Powerful Poem
If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You: Powerful Poem explores the deep emotional pain of losing a child to suicide. The author conveys their experience through poignant verses that depict the raw essence of grief, reflecting the complex emotions of sorrow and longing. The heartfelt language serves as a reminder of enduring love in the face of unimaginable loss.

When Love Isn’t Enough: “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand”
When Love Isn’t Enough: “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand” explores the complexities of suicide and includes a compassionate treatise written by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” challenging the notion that it is a choice. The treatise, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” emphasizes the inevitability of death, regardless of the cause, and the limitations of love in preventing it. The author of the treatise “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand” and this article, “When Love Isn’t Enough,” Beth Brown shares her personal journey of grief after losing her son to suicide, finding solace in writing and nature photography.

Navigating Grief: Reflections Three Years After Losing My Son to Suicide
Introduction
Navigating Grief: Reflections Three Years After Losing My Son to Suicide is a deeply heartfelt collection of five poignant blog posts that chronicles my emotional journey through the third year following the tragic loss of my only son, Dylan, to suicide on June 25, 2012. This intimate compilation offers reflections and valuable resources that document a parent’s harrowing experience with overwhelming grief.
This heartfelt collection of blog posts from year three of my grief offers a profound exploration of sorrow and the healing journey, illuminating stories of love, remembrance, and a connection that transcends the boundaries of death. By sharing both the struggles and transformative experiences, this blog, My Forever Son, aspires to provide solace, practical insights, and a glimmer of hope to those navigating the intricate complexities of grief.
Navigating Grief: Reflections Three Years After Losing My Son to Suicide powerfully captures the intricate emotions of grief and the slow journey toward healing. During this early phase of grieving, I expressed the profound feelings I endured, alongside the challenging changes I encountered as I learned to navigate life without my cherished son. The three-year mark became a pivotal moment in my grief journey as I slowly began to reclaim my life.
My Journals: A Journey Through Sorrow and Unexpected Hope
During this tumultuous time of trying to regain order in my life after the loss of my son to suicide, I grappled with deep grief and confusion. My journals recorded not only my sorrow but also unexpected moments of joy as I navigated a world that felt forever changed.
I reflected on cherished memories, revisiting the laughter and love we shared, despite the profound emptiness my son’s absence left behind. Writing became a means to navigate my emotions and begin to heal amidst enduring heartbreak.
Related Reads

Healing Grief: 3 Years After Losing My Son
Healing Grief: 3 Years After Losing My Son is a profoundly touching reflection on the author’s heartfelt journey through the complexities of grief, hope, and healing, marking three long years since the devastating loss of her only child, her son Dylan, to suicide.
The thoughtfully selected images, many capturing the beauty of the author’s gardens, provide a poignant backdrop that deepens the emotional resonance of her words, inviting readers to connect with their own experiences of sorrow and healing.
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Healing After Loss: 3 Years of Grieving My Son
Healing After Loss: 3 Years of Grieving My Son is another poignant post that comes from the pages of the author’s journals in the third year after losing her son to suicide.
In this heartfelt post, the author shares her most intimate thoughts and reflections, revealing the profound impact of her loss and the journey towards finding solace. Each entry is a testament to her resilience, capturing the raw emotions of grief, the struggle for acceptance, and the moments of unexpected joy that arise amidst the sorrow after 3 years of losing my son.
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Living Backwards Going Forward-A Grief Journey in Year 3: Reflections from a Mother’s Heart
Living Backwards Going Forward-A Grief Journey in Year 3 compassionately delves into another of the author’s journals during the third year of her grief journey, where she encountered a haunting “sense of the surreal” after the loss of her son to suicide..
Each day felt trapped in the echo of her son’s memorial date, as cherished memories flooded her heart, prompting deep reflections on her parenting while navigating the relentless waves of sorrow.
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Healing Grief: Embracing Quiet Tears After 3 Years of Loss
Healing Grief: Embracing Quiet Tears After 3 Years of Loss offers a heartfelt exploration of the profound and painful journey through grief following the heartbreaking loss of my son to suicide.
The author poignantly shares her deeply personal experiences of navigating this overwhelming sorrow, using writing, gardening, and cherishing memories as powerful tools for healing. Through her words in this journal entry, she connects with others who may share similar feelings, creating a comforting space for understanding and empathy.
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“I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Grief Journey
“I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing”: A Journey Through Grief offers a heartfelt glimpse into the author’s journals from her third year of navigating grief after the profound loss of her son to suicide, articulating the raw and poignant emotional experiences that accompany the path to healing.
Additional resources on the third year of grief enrich this exploration, providing valuable reflections on this challenging journey and the complexities of healing during such a difficult time.
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Author’s Note: A Poetic Quest for Healing After Losing My Son
Twelve years ago, I lost my 20-year-old son, Dylan, to suicide, a heartbreaking event that shattered my world and plunged me into a dark period of grief.
During those long months, I found myself grappling with overwhelming emotions and thoughts, questioning everything around me and struggling to make sense of what will never make sense. I entered into a deep grief filled with solitude and despair, a darkness so bleak I questioned ever being able to see light again.
In the beginning, I had no words. No voice. No ability to express the grief I was feeling.
My words were lost in torrents of tears, in stark contrast to the vibrant discussions I used to lead in my college composition and literature classes.
Perhaps it’s important to preface that I was teaching college composition and literature when I lost my son to suicide, a tragedy that shattered all of me. The irony of discussing the complexities of human emotion with my students while grappling with my own profound sorrow was not lost on me.
Each day, I faced the challenge of maintaining my professional facade, all the while battling an internal tempest that seemed insurmountable, wondering how to bridge the chasm between my role as an educator and the personal devastation I was enduring.

My Life Before Losing My Son
Books, lectures, teaching—I once felt empowered by my voice, a resonant tool for sharing ideas and knowledge. It was a time when I believed in the strength of my words and the influence they carried, inspiring others to think deeply and engage in meaningful conversations.
I reveled in the connections I forged through sharing my thoughts, feeling a sense of purpose in my contributions to the world. But when Dylan died by suicide, I felt consumed by my grief. My heart collapsed inward in sharp pain, I retreated from the outside world, and my words eluded me.
Teaching was impossible. Losing Dylan shattered my life, leaving me, on the outside at least, grappling with an overwhelming silence that echoed louder than any lecture or written page.
On the inside, I was screaming sounds I did not recognize as my own.
The Depth of My Loss Brought My Life to a Standstill
The vibrant energy that once fueled my passion for writing vanquished, and I found myself questioning everything without being able to lend voice to the confusion and overwhelming feelings I was moving through in my grief.
The depth of my loss silenced the joy I once derived from sharing my thoughts and connecting with others.
All of my life came to a standstill as I entered a place of deep grief. It is only in retrospect and in these twelve years past my son’s suicide that I see how all-consuming my grief was.
Diminishing the confidence that fuels expression, my grief stifled my voice completely. It’s been a difficult battle to reclaim my sense of self amidst such sorrow.
A Poetic Quest for Self-Forgiveness and Healing
Journaling was awkward. I couldn’t put all the pain I was feeling into words that did justice to the enormity of my heartbreak. But I kept writing. Slowly, in keeping a record of my grief, I realized I was creating a poetic journey about losing a child to suicide.

“Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing”
Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a heartfelt collection of poems and reflections by Beth Brown, the compassionate voice behind the My Forever Son blog. This poignant work navigates the deep, overwhelming sorrow that accompanies the tragic loss of a child to suicide. In her writing, Brown bravely shares her personal journey through grief, revealing how the act of writing poetry and connecting with the beauty of nature became vital sources of comfort and healing for her in the midst of such profound pain.
Through the author’s heartfelt verses, she reaches out with warmth and understanding to those who are journeying through their own sorrows. With her enchanting photography of the trees, shrubs, and flowers that grace her gardens throughout the seasons, Brown lovingly shares a beacon of hope, brightly illuminating the shadows cast by grief.
On Finding Hope: Photographing My Gardens Brings Healing
In nature, I find calm in the wake of profound sorrow and healing in the cycling of the seasons. Predictable. Beautiful in the spring, promising renewal after a long winter’s rest. Brilliant hues in the summer months. Autumn bringing trees and shrubs bejeweled in vivid reds, oranges, and reds. And then the stillness and monochromatic sketch of what can be a too long winter’s sleep.
Winter Wonderland: Captivating Photos in My Gardens













A Long Winter’s Rest for Trees, Shrubs, and Flowers
This dormant season in winter echoes the hopelessness of my grief: everything feels, looks, seems bleak and forsaken.
This dormant season in winter echoes the hopelessness of my grief: everything feels, looks, seems bleak and forsaken. An empty landscape. Gray skies for months. A blanket of snow in white, though only the stark limbs of trees and shrubs. At times, though, red berries appear on some shrubs, supplying food for birds and wildlife. All this to say I can’t see life against this wintry scene.
But in photographing nature through the seasons, I began to see (again), the brilliance of a long winter’s rest for trees, shrubs, and flowers. To study nature and botany is to realize that what appears lifeless is actually the process of life within all of nature renewing itself. Trusting in what I cannot see brings hope and healing.
Spring Brings Hope: Photographs of My Gardens














Spring Brings Beauty and Hope
Even against the cold remnants of a long winter–scattered clumps of snow, a robin redbreast plumped out to keep itself warm against a late March frost, brown dried leaves with nary a sign of color anywhere, spring breaks through. At first just small bits of color. A hint of purple as crocus push through thawing ground, then the vivid yellows of daffodils leaning towards the sun and the suddenness of blue bells. Rhododendron yawns and stretches its lavender limbs to awaken azalea, still sleepy with snow though greening beneath it all.
What seems forever gone in the gray doldrums of winter arrives with an abundance of joy come spring.
Writing My Way Through Grief to Find Hope and Healing
Snippets of language emerged as poetic reflections
Three years into my grief, I began writing journal entries. Short. A few feelings. About my day and where I was in my grief journey. Then slowly, snippets of language emerged as poetic reflections. Words shaped the deep feelings and emotional longing in my heart, and as I continued writing, I began to find small glimpses of hope in unexpected ways.
Photographing my gardens garnered a way to coalesce all the many feelings and words I’d been unable to express. And the more I photographed through the seasons, the more glimmers of hope I found along the way.
Each poignant poem in Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a dedicated blog post in its own right, replete with the inspiration behind the poem.
The poems included in Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing appear below. Each poem is a blog post in its own right, oftentimes replete with the inspiration behind the poem.
Each poem moves the reader through the profound emotions of grief and healing after losing a child.
Many of the poems tell narratives I remember from my son’s childhood. This is significant–reconstructing the narrative of our lives during his growing-up years brings release for all the love and beautiful memories before the trauma of losing him. Writing these poems and narratives, these poetic reflections on love and loss, have helped me learn to carry love and ache together.
Still I write. Still I heal. Still I miss my son.
From Shattered Hearts to Quiet Hope: Poems and Reflections for Parents of Suicide Loss
Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
If you are reading this, you know the unique and overwhelming grief of losing a child to suicide. This collection is for you—a place to find words and images that honor your pain, offer comfort, and gently invite hope.
Curated by Beth Brown, who lost her only child, her 20-year-old son Dylan, to suicide, these poems and reflections move through the rawness of early trauma, the depths of acute grief, and the slow journey toward healing, even thirteen years later. Each post pairs heartfelt writing with stunning garden photography, inspired by Beth’s own search for solace in nature’s resilience.
Hope can be quiet—listen for it in moments of rest.
You are invited to explore at your own pace. Choose what resonates—whether it’s a poem that mirrors your sorrow, a reflection that offers comfort, or an image that whispers hope. For more resources, stories, and support, visit the My Forever Son blog and discover a community that understands.
Contemplation Prompt:
Pause with a garden image. What does it say to you about survival, growth, or hope?
About the Author, Beth Brown: Writing My Way Through Grief
The love you shared endures beyond loss.
This collection is lovingly curated by Beth Brown, a mother who lost her only child, her 20-year-old son Dylan, to suicide. Over thirteen years, Beth’s journey through the depths of grief has been shaped by poetry, reflection, and the healing presence of her gardens. Through My Forever Son, she shares how nature’s resilience and beauty offer moments of solace and hope, even in the face of unimaginable loss.
Explore These Poems and Reflections at Your Own Pace
You are invited to explore these poems and reflections at your own pace. Each post pairs heartfelt words with stunning garden photography, offering comfort, understanding, and gentle encouragement for wherever you are in your grief. Select what speaks to you—let these pages be a companion on your path toward healing. For more resources, stories, and support, visit the My Forever Son blog and discover a community that understands.
Journaling Prompt:
What memories of your child bring both tears and warmth? Write a few lines, letting your heart speak freely.
You are not alone. Healing is a journey, and hope can bloom—even here.
Message of Hope:
Even in the darkest seasons, a single flower can remind us that beauty and life persist. Let these poems be gentle companions as you move through your grief.
FIND HOPE HERE: POEMS AND POETIC REFLECTIONS ON GRIEF AND HEALING
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on Grieving a Child’s Suicide
“On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on the Devastating Loss of a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings” in the post, “On Baby’s Breath and Angel Wings”: A Poem on Grieving a Child’s Suicide explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth…
Read MoreUnderstanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message
Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message Summary Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message explores the profound grief and regret of losing a child to suicide through the poem, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon,” by author Beth Brown. Through vivid imagery and heartfelt repetition, the poem captures the enduring love…
Read More“He Left Too Soon” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow
“He Left Too Soon, Lifting Life from June” Poem: A Mother’s Deep Sorrow Summary “He Left Too Soon” is a poem about the profound sorrow and anguish of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her personal experience of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. Through her writing,…
Read More“Sorrow Buried in Love”: A Poem for Grieving Parents
Sorrow Buried in Love: A Poem for Grieving Parents Summary “Sorrow Buried in Love: A Poem for Grieving Parents” explores the profound grief and complex emotions experienced by parents who have lost a child to suicide. The poem emphasizes the importance of honoring the child’s memory while navigating the challenging path of healing, highlighting that…
Read MoreHaunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling”
Haunted by Guilt in Grief Poem: “Still from Sky I’m Falling” Summary Beth Brown, a devoted mother who suffered the heartbreaking loss of her son to suicide, recounts her profound journey of healing through the power of poetry in her poignant blog, My Forever Son: Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide. In her deeply…
Read MoreThe Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy
The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy Summary The Emotional Depth of ‘Beat Still My Heart’: A Powerful Elegy features the grief poem, “Beat Still My Heart,”a powerful elegy that uses shipwreck imagery to convey the grief of losing a child to suicide. The grief poem, written by Beth Brown, explores…
Read MoreGrieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love” Poem
Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem Summary Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem highlights the powerful poem “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” which explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. It delves…
Read MoreFind Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing
Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing Summary Find Hope Here: Poetic Reflections on Grief and Healing is a heartfelt collection of poems on love and loss that tenderly explores the profound pain of losing a child to suicide. The author, Beth Brown, shares her deeply personal journey through grief, illustrating how she…
Read More“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss
“Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss Summary “Bury My Heart”: A Grief Poem of Unimaginable Loss is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound grief and longing experienced after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the author’s personal journey of navigating life without her son, Dylan, and…
Read More“That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back”: Poem on Guilt in Grief
‘That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back’: Poem on Guilt in Grief Summary “That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back” is a poignant poem by Beth Brown, exploring the profound guilt and sorrow parents experience after losing a child to suicide. The poem delves into the haunting questions of “What If?” and “Why…
Read MoreDerecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere – Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon”
Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere–Grief Poem, “He Left Too Soon” Summary Beth Brown’s poignant poem, “Derecho: A Storm Out of Nowhere -Grief Poem “He Left Too Soon,” skillfully intertwines the sorrow stemming from the loss of her son to suicide with the tumult wrought by a powerful Derecho storm that occurred on the day…
Read MoreWhen Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’
When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ Summary When Love Isn’t Enough: ‘Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand’ unravels the profound complexities surrounding suicide, featuring an impactful poem and a heartfelt treatise by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand.” This poignant article and poetic reflection encourage readers…
Read MoreTillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss
Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil: A Poem of Love and Loss Summary “Tillers of the Earth and Tenders of the Soil”: A Poem of Love and Loss is a heartfelt reflection on the themes of love and loss, born from the deep and painful grief of the author following the heartbreaking…
Read More“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss
“If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss Summary “If Earth Were Sky (And Sky Above)” Poem: Reflections on Love and Loss depicts a deeply personal and emotional journey of losing a child to suicide. The author effectively conveys the profound impact of grief through heartfelt words and metaphors. The…
Read More“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: Poem on Child Loss
“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide is a heartfelt piece on losing a child to suicide that explores the profound grief and longing experienced after such a tragic loss. The…
Read MoreThe Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience
The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience Summary The Magnolia Tree: A Symbol of Grief and Resilience explores the author’s journey of grief through the metaphor of a Magnolia tree’s cyclical seasons. The author uses photography to illustrate the parallels between nature’s cycles and the seasons of grief, finding hope and healing in…
Read MoreHolding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis
Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis Summary Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis by Beth Brown explores the profound connection between love and grief following the loss of her son to suicide. The poem emphasizes the author’s refusal to change her narrative of grief, asserting…
Read MoreFinding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing
Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing Key Takeaways Summary Finding Beauty in Loss: Reflections on Grief and Healing shares author Beth Brown’s journey of grief and healing after losing her son, Dylan, to suicide. Through poetry and nature photography, she finds solace and a way to express her overwhelming emotions after suicide loss.…
Read More“Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Loss
“Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide Summary “Rain Comes to Heal Us All” Poem: Finding Hope After Loss conveys a powerful message of hope for parents grieving a child’s suicide. Acknowledging the profound sorrow of loss and the traumatic grief of losing a child to suicide,…
Read More“Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope
“Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope Summary “Travel On My Brave Soldier”: A Poem of Hope addresses grieving parents who have suffered the unimaginable loss of a child to suicide. It underscores the profound importance of honoring their child’s memory through meaningful rituals, sharing heartfelt stories, and engaging in advocacy events that…
Read MoreEmbracing Grief: A Mother’s Poetic Journey
From journaling to discovering the poetic language that encapsulates my grief, I penned my path to healing, culminating in the creation of my book, Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide.
The anthology of poems in this book provides a profound and moving examination of grief, intricately intertwining original verses that delve into themes of loss, guilt, hope, self-forgiveness, and the path to healing. Expertly curated, the arrangement of poems invites deep reflection, serving as a treasured companion for those in search of solace and connection during difficult times.
Online Directory for Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress
After A Suicide Resource Directory: Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress
http://www.personalgriefcoach.net
This online directory links people who are grieving after a suicide death to resources and information.
Alliance of Hope for Suicide Survivors
http://www.allianceofhope.org
This organization for survivors of suicide loss provides information sheets, a blog, and a community forum through which survivors can share with each other.
Friends for Survival
http://www.friendsforsurvival.org
This organization is for suicide loss survivors and professionals who work with them. It produces a monthly newsletter and runs the Suicide Loss Helpline (1-800-646-7322). It also published Pathways to Purpose and Hope, a guide to building a community-based suicide survivor support program.
HEARTBEAT: Grief Support Following Suicide
http://heartbeatsurvivorsaftersuicide.org
This organization has chapters providing support groups for survivors of suicide loss in Colorado and some other states. Its website provides information sheets for survivors and a leader’s guide on how to start a new chapter of HEARTBEAT.
Resources and Support Groups
Parents of Suicides and Friends & Families of Suicides (POS-FFOS)
http://www.pos-ffos.com
This website provides a public message board called Suicide Grief Support Forum, a listserv for parents, a separate listserv for others, and an online chat room for survivors of suicide loss.
Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS)
https://www.taps.org/suicide
This organization provides resources and programs for people grieving the loss of a loved one who died while serving in the U.S. armed forces or as a result of their service. It has special resources and programs for suicide loss survivors.
United Survivors
https://unitesurvivors.org/
This organization is a place where people who have experienced suicide loss, suicide attempts, and suicidal thoughts and feelings, and their friends and families, can connect to use their lived experience to advocate for policy, systems, and cultural change.
Professional Organizations
American Association of Suicidology
suicidology.org • (202) 237-2280
Promotes public awareness, education and training for professionals, and sponsors an annual Healing After Suicide conference for suicide loss survivors. In addition to the conference, they offer a coping with suicide grief handbook by Jeffrey Jackson. This booklet is also available in Spanish.
The Compassionate Friends
compassionatefriends.org • (877) 969-0010
Offers resources for families after the death of a child. They sponsor support groups, newsletters and online support groups throughout the country, as well as an annual national conference for bereaved families.
The Dougy Center
The National Center for Grieving Children & Families
dougy.org • (503) 775-5683
Publishes extensive resources for helping children and teens who are grieving a death including death by suicide. Resources include the “Children, Teens and Suicide Loss” booklet created in partnership with AFSP. This booklet is also available in Spanish.
Link’s National Resource Center for Suicide Prevention and Aftercare
thelink.org/nrc-for-suicide-prevention-aftercar • 404-256-2919
Dedicated to reaching out to those whose lives have been impacted by suicide and connecting them to available resources.
Tragedy Assistance Programs for Survivors (TAPS)
taps.org/suicide • (800) 959-TAPS (8277)
Provides comfort, care and resources to all those grieving the death of a military loved one through a national peer support network and connection to grief resources, all at no cost to surviving families and loved ones.
LOSS
losscs.org
Offers support groups, remembrance events, companioning, suicide postvention and prevention education, and training to other communities interested in developing or enhancing their suicide postvention and prevention efforts.
Online resources
Alliance of Hope
allianceofhope.org
Provides a 24/7 online forum for suicide loss survivors.
Help Guide
helpguide.org
Provides resources and tips for how to navigate the loss of someone to suicide.
Parents of Suicides (POS) – Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS)
pos-ffos.com
An internet community to connect parents, friends, and family that have lost someone to suicide.
SAVE: Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
save.org/programs/suicide-loss-support • (952) 946-7998
Hosts resources for suicide loss survivor including a support group database, newsletter, survivor conference and the Named Memorial Program, which offers a special way to honor your loved one.
Siblings Survivors of Suicide Loss
siblingsurvivors.com
Provides resources and a platform to connect with others that have lost a sibling to suicide.
Finding professional care and support
Find a mental health provider
- afsp.org/FindAMentalHealthProfessional
- findtreatment.samhsa.gov
- mentalhealthamerica.net/finding-help
- inclusivetherapists.com
- afsp.org/suicide-bereavement-trained-clinicians
Find a provider for prolonged grief
Find additional resources for marginalized communities
Crisis Services
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
988lifeline.org
Call or text 988 (press 1 for Veterans, 2 for Spanish, 3 for LGBTQ+ youth and young adults) or chat 988lifeline.org
A 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With crisis centers across the country, their mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential.
Crisis Text Line
crisistextline.org
Text TALK to 741-741 for English
Text AYUDA to 741-741 for Spanish
Provides free, text-based mental health support and crisis intervention by empowering a community of trained volunteers to support people in their moments of need, 24/7.
Parents of Suicides: An Online Support Group for Parents Who Lose a Child to Suicide

Suicide is the anchor point on a continuum of suicidal thoughts & behaviors. This continuum is one that ranges from risk-taking behaviors at one end, extends through different degrees & types of suicidal thinking, & ends with suicide attempts and suicide.
Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, National Library of Medicine
Parents of Suicides is a dedicated international online closed email group where parents who have lost a child to suicide come together to offer support, hope, and healing. Join a Community of Understanding. Parents of Suicides (PoS) provides a safe space for sharing experiences, coping mechanisms, and emotional support. You are not alone in this journey. Together, we can find strength and solace.
Professional Resources and Support
Parents of Suicides is a compassionate, international online community for parents who have tragically lost a child to suicide, providing a safe space for support, connection, and resources to aid in their healing journey.
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention is a compassionate nonprofit organization devoted to saving lives and offering hope to individuals and families impacted by the profound pain of suicide.
Alliance of Hope for Suicide Loss Survivors offers compassionate healing support for those navigating the profound shock, heart-wrenching grief, and intricate emotions that arise from losing a cherished loved one to suicide.
The American Association of Suicidology is a compassionate membership organization dedicated to deepening our understanding of suicide and working tirelessly to prevent it, fostering hope and healing for those affected.
Nationwide Children’s Hospital Suicide Research Center is dedicated to conducting compassionate research focused on understanding and reducing suicidal behaviors, as well as providing valuable insights to prevent the profound pain of suicide.
Mayo Clinic offers compassionate insights into the profound sorrow of losing a loved one to suicide, helping us navigate the complex emotions that accompany such grief and providing guidance on finding solace and support during this incredibly challenging time.
The Compassionate Friends provide invaluable Grief Resources & Support Groups for Parents and Families navigating the profound heartache of losing a child, offering comfort and connection during an incredibly difficult time.
Newest Posts
- My Forever Son, My Beloved Dylan: Just BreatheMy Forever Son, My Beloved Dylan : Just Breathe: My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide A mother’s reflections on losing her only child–her 20-year-old son–to suicide, this blog (My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide) includes messages of hope and healing amidst acute, complicated,… Read more: My Forever Son, My Beloved Dylan: Just Breathe
- Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt MessageUnderstanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message Summary Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message explores the profound grief and regret of losing a child to suicide through the poem, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon,” by author Beth Brown. Through vivid imagery and heartfelt repetition, the poem captures the enduring love… Read more: Understanding ‘Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon’ Poem’s Heartfelt Message
- Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem AnalysisHolding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis Summary Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis by Beth Brown explores the profound connection between love and grief following the loss of her son to suicide. The poem emphasizes the author’s refusal to change her narrative of grief, asserting… Read more: Holding True to My Son’s Narrative: “Shaped by Love” Poem Analysis
- Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love” PoemGrieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem Summary Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” Poem highlights the powerful poem “If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You” which explores the profound grief of losing a child to suicide. It delves… Read more: Grieving a Child’s Suicide: “If Only a Mother’s Love” Poem
- “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: Poem on Child Loss“Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide Summary The poem “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: A Poem on Losing a Child to Suicide is a heartfelt piece on losing a child to suicide that explores the profound grief and longing experienced after such a tragic loss. The… Read more: “Falling Stars in a Moonless Sky”: Poem on Child Loss

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