Categories
Grief After Suicide Suicide loss Suicide Loss-Parents Support, Books, Resources understanding suicide

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Close-up of bright yellow nasturtium flowers surrounded by green leaves, symbolizing resilience and hope, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
Vibrant yellow nasturtium flowers blooming amidst green leaves, symbolizing resilience and hope, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Summary

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide provides a detailed description of and discussion of “Prolonged Grief Disorder,” “previously known as complicated grief, describes long-term mourning after loss, especially from suicide. Suicide grief is complicated by guilt, shame, and societal stigma, making it difficult to move through. While labeling grief as a disorder allows access to professional help, grief should not be viewed as a disorder but as a natural response to loss.

Key Takeaways

  • The article Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide delves into a discussion of Prolonged Grief Disorder, previously known as complicated grief, which describes long-term mourning after loss, especially from suicide loss.
  • Suicide grief complicates the grieving process due to guilt, shame, and societal stigma surrounding suicide.
  • Labeling grief as Prolonged Grief Disorder allows access to professional help and insurance coverage for therapy.
  • Moving through suicide grief takes time and cannot adhere to a strict timeline; healing is a personal journey.
  • Grief should not be viewed as a disorder; rather, it serves as a complex, natural response to loss.

Introduction

Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide offers a compassionate exploration of “Prolonged Grief Disorder,” formerly referred to as complicated grief. This condition highlights the deeply challenging experience of long-term mourning, particularly following the loss of a loved one to suicide. The grief associated with suicide is often intertwined with feelings of guilt, shame, and societal stigma, making the healing journey particularly daunting. Although recognizing grief as a disorder can pave the way for essential professional support, it is important to remember that grief is a profoundly personal experience that deserves understanding and care.

My Forever Son

Red Nasturtium on Stone Ledge, My Forever Son, Suicide Grief: Prolonged Grief Disorder? and Guilt in Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide

My Forever Son explores the profound grief, hope, and healing that follow the tragedy of losing a child to suicide.

My Forever Son dovetails the author’s journey of descending into deep grief, searching for hope, and finding healing along the way.

Table of Contents

Suicide [grief] can be complicated by feelings of guilt, shame, responsibility, rejection, and stigmatization.

National Library of Medicine, Grief interventions for people bereaved by suicide: A systematic review

What Is Prolonged Grief Disorder?

Complicated Grief

Known as complicated grief until 2022, long-term grief is now defined by the DSM-5 as Prolonged Grief Disorder. When you’ve lost a child to suicide, grief cannot be easily parsed into passages of time. Hours, days, months, and years of processing grief are not unusual.

The latest edition of the DSM-5, [the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders] sometimes known as “psychiatry’s bible,” includes a controversial new diagnosis: prolonged grief disorder.

Ellen Barry, “How Long Should It Take to Grieve? Psychiatry Has Come Up With an Answer, Ellen Barry, The New York Times, March 22, 2022

Read more about prolonged grief disorder here: “How Long Should It Take to Grieve? Psychiatry Has An Answer.”

Why Suicide Grief Is Complicated

Both Complicated Grief and Prolonged Grief terms are used interchangeably when discussing grief. But Complicated Grief is not officially labeled a mental disorder. That Prolonged Grief is labeled a mental disorder in psychiatry’s the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Volume 5, has made the new term controversial.

Read more about prolonged grief disorder and what the disorder characteristically includes here: “What is Prolonged Grief Disorder”?

Suicide Grief: Wrestling with Guilt, Self-Blame, and Why

Frankly, I don’t see how suicide grief can’t be complicated. Having lost my son to suicide, I believe Suicide Grief (especially after losing a child to suicide) is always complicated. You can read more about the challenges inherent in grieving a suicide loss here: 5 Ways Suicide Grief is Different.

The burden of guilt and self-blame feels impossible to move beyond. Strategies for coping with guilt and self-blame can help you through the immense, complicated grief of suicide loss.

A close-up of a potted red flower surrounded by green leaves, sitting on a stone surface with dried leaves scattered around, symbolizing resilience in the face of loss, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
A vibrant red flower blooming amidst a backdrop of autumn leaves and greenery, symbolizing resilience in the face of loss, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

But is Suicide Grief Prolonged Grief Disorder?

The burden of questioning Why? What did I miss? Why didn’t I know? adds exponentially to the self-blame, shame, and guilt of moving through grief after suicide loss.

The Stigma of Suicide

That suicide is still stigmatized also complicates suicide grief. And the shame and rejection of losing your child to suicide? Not something easily worked through. It’s not unusual to grieve a suicide loss over the course of years.

The Healing Power of Grief

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler in their book, On Grief and Grieving, have this to say about moving through grief:

There is wonder in the power of grief. We don’t appreciate its healing powers, yet they are extraordinary and wondrous. It is just as amazing as the physical healing that occurs after a car accident or major surgery. Grief transforms the broken, wounded soul, a soul that no longer wants to get up in the morning, a soul that can find no reason for living, a soul that has suffered an unbelievable loss. Grief alone has the power to heal.

Kubler-Ross &Kessler, On Grief and Grieving

“Stop Trying to Heal From Grief”

Litsa Williams, who writes for What’s Your Grief, shares her professional view of grief in her article, “Stop Trying to Heal From Grief.” Williams’ article is worth reading. She talks about the fact that we don’t “heal” from our grief, but that instead our grief “heals” us.

Grieving is our normal and natural human response to…loss. It is the physical, emotional, cognitive, relational, existential, spiritual experience we all go through, in varying degrees and in various ways, after a loss.

Litsa Williams, Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief, What’s Your Grief Blog
A close-up view of tree branches with yellow leaves against a clear blue sky, illuminated by sunlight, symbolizing the beauty of nature amidst the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
A serene view of autumn leaves against a clear blue sky, symbolizing the beauty of nature amidst the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Moving Through Grief Takes Time

Grief after suicide loss takes as long as it takes, which oftentimes means moving through the grief process without a clearly defined timetable. The difference between my grief the first year after losing my son to suicide and now, at 10 years out, is vast.

The Advantage of Calling Complicated Grief “Prolonged Grief Disorder”

At this point, having a professionally recognized disorder, Prolonged Grief Disorder, means being able to seek professional help from therapists and counselors. It also means that the cost of working with grief professionals is covered by insurance.

Suicide Grief Needs Time for Healing

Up until this professional language change redefining complicated grief as Prolonged Grief Disorder, insurance companies often limited visits without regard to the difficulty of processing grief after suicide loss.

Suicide grief, with its added burden of working through guilt, self-blame, shame, and why, means those bereaved by suicide need sufficient time to move through their grief. Putting a limit of any sort, be it a passage of time; a certain number of visits (typically 3-9 visits); or complying with societal expectations, is not realistic for moving through the heaviness of grief after suicide loss.

Close-up of autumn leaves displaying a gradient of colors from green to orange and red, showing signs of seasonal change, symbolizing the profound changes and reflections accompanying grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
Autumn leaves showcasing vibrant colors, symbolizing the profound changes and reflections accompanying grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

How Losing a Child to Suicide Complicates and Prolongs Grief

Complicated grief [Prolonged Grief Disorder] is characterized by intense longing, intrusive preoccupation with the circumstances of the loss, self-blame, avoidance of thoughts or memories of the deceased, avoidance of previously shared activities, and inadequate adaptation to the loss.

National Library of Medicine, Grief interventions for people bereaved by suicide: A systematic review, Multiple Authors

Intense longing? Intrusive preoccupation with the circumstances of the loss? Self-blame? Avoidance of previously shared activities? Inadequate adaptation to the loss? All of these descriptors describe what I moved through the first few years after my son’s suicide. I am now 10 years out from Dylan’s memorial date. Losing a child to suicide complicates and prolongs grief.

Has my grief changed? Was it Prolonged Grief Disorder those first few years? I lost my only child, my 20 year-old, to suicide. My grief was complicated and profound. It still is, 10 years later, though I have learned to carry ache and loss.

Losing My Son to Suicide: My Grief

I lost my whole world in losing Dylan. I’ve spent the last 10 years since Dylan’s memorial date rebuilding and creating a life where I want to live on. In the early years of my grief, I simply didn’t want to live without my son.

Acute Grief in the First Year

 we heal through grief. . .grief is healing.

Litsa Williams, “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief,” What’s Your Grief?

Acute grief and the agony of early grief, however, is not confined to the first year. The grief of losing a child to suicide will always be with me. But suicide grief, even losing a child to suicide grief, can be worked through with the help of support, books, and resources.

But the the healing process takes as long as it takes. Grief is not something we choose; grief is our physiological response to loss.

Grief is How We Process Loss

Grief is how we process. . .loss. After loss we open our eyes to a world that in no way resembles the world we once knew. In this new world, grief is how we come to understand who we are, how we feel, and how we will survive in this new world. In grieving we create a relationship with a person who died.

Litsa Williams, “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief,” What’s Your Grief?
Yellow Roses Against Stone Wall, photographed for My Forever Son, Prolonged Grief Disorder, symbolizing resilience and hope in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
A blooming yellow rose stands amidst overgrown grass, symbolizing resilience and hope in the journey of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Why Prolonged Grief Disorder is Controversial

Grief is not something we need to heal from. Rather, grief IS the healing.

Litsa Williams, Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief, What’s Your Grief?

The Downside of Labeling Grief as “Prolonged Grief Disorder”

Grief is not our adversary

Grief can make our lives disordered (and grief itself is inherently messy), but our grief is the natural response to loss.

“If the language I hear early after my loss is that I must ‘recover from grief’ or ‘heal from grief’, I see grief as an adversary,” writes Litsa Williams in “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief,” an article from the What’s Your Grief Blog. Williams goes on to explain:

That language [that grief requires healing, and that I must recover from grief] molds my understanding of grief itself, seeing it as a problem. Or worse, as a threat, something that has in and of itself caused harm, a thing to escape. It is no surprise that I might then avoid my grief. Or I might interpret signs of ongoing grief as a sign of failure.

Litsa Williams, “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief,” What’s Your Grief?

We Heal Through Grief

Grief and grieving are not the source of our pain. The source of the pain is the loss itself.

Litsa Williams, Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief, What’s Your Grief?

If I hear, early after my loss, that we ‘heal through grief’ or that ‘grieving is an ongoing and evolving process of healing’, my understanding of grief is shaped in a fundamentally different way. Grief is no longer my adversary, a boogeyman hiding under the bed. Instead of something to escape, battle, or eliminate, grief is a companion. And when I am no longer fighting against my grief, I am able to invite it in. I can listen to what it is teaching me about myself, about those I’ve lost, about how to live in this new world.

Litsa Williams, “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief,” What’s Your Grief

Grief is a Companion

I like Williams’ way of seeing grief, that grief is a companion. In the midst of the shock and immediacy of the pain of loss, the last thing I would do is call grief a companion. But I do see, after 10 years out from my son’s death by suicide, that my grief is a steady companion. Bittersweet moments remind me that while I’ve learned to live again, Dylan’s loss will always be with me.

Grief is Not a “Disorder”

An associate professor of social work at Arizona State University, Joanne Cacciatore, has this to say about the recent addition of “Prolonged Grief Disorder” to psychiatry’s be-all, end-all manual of diagnoses:

‘I completely, utterly disagree that grief is a mental illness.’

Dr. Joanne Cacciatore, “How Long Should It Take to Grieve? Psychiatry Has Come Up With an Answer,” Ellen Barry, The New York Times, March 22, 2022

Grief is Not a “Mental Illness”

Joanne Cacciatore has published widely on grief. She operates the Selah Carefarm, a retreat for bereaved people. She continues to explain why she disagrees that grief (Prolonged Grief Disorder) is a mental illness:

‘When someone who is a quote-unquote expert tells us we are disordered and we are feeling very vulnerable and feeling overwhelmed, we no longer trust ourselves and our emotions. To me, that is an incredibly dangerous move, and short sighted.’

Dr. Joanne Cacciatore as quoted in “How Long Should It Take to Grieve? Psychiatry Has Come Up With an Answer, Ellen Barry, The New York Times, March 22, 2022
Close-up view of colorful leaves, showcasing various shades of pink, red, and green against a blurred background, symbolizing the complex emotions involved in grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
Vibrant autumn leaves showcasing a mix of red, pink, and green hues, symbolizing the complex emotions involved in grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

The Upside of Labeling Grief “Prolonged Grief Disorder”

Its inclusion in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders means that clinicians can now bill insurance companies for treating people for the condition.

“How Long Should It Take to Grieve? Psychiatry Has Come Up With an Answer, Ellen Barry, The New York Times, March 22, 2022

“In grief we begin to make sense of who we are in a world without a person who defined us”

We develop the continued bonds that will evolve with us as we move forward in a world without that person. Grief allows us to turn inward [to] assess what we need from ourselves and others in this life after loss. It has the power to clarify our values and our priorities. In grief we begin to make sense of who we are in a world without a person who defined us. 

Litsa Williams, “Stop Trying to Heal Your Grief“, What’s Your Grief?

Is Suicide Grief (Complicated Grief) a Prolonged Grief Disorder?

So in the end, labeling grief that lasts longer than 6 months to one year “Prolonged Grief Disorder” can help those seeking counseling gain access to a seeing a professional in the mental health field. It really all comes down to licensed clinicians being able to bill insurance companies which ensures those who want help moving through grief, get the help they need.

And seeking help from a counselor or psychiatrist is an individual choice. All grief is painful to move through, but suicide grief? And losing my only child to suicide? There aren’t even enough words to express the agony of this grief. My grief is profound and prolonged. It always will be.

I can’t even imagine trying to make it through the enormity of this grief on my own. Support groups, friendships with other parents who have lost a child to suicide, reading about grief and child loss, counseling, time out from Dylan’s suicide (10 years), walking, being in nature, art, music, and writing all help. Dylan couldn’t live with his pain, but I have found a way (most days) to live on, to move forward carrying ache and love.

A magnifying glass over a sheet of paper with the text 'Frequently asked Questions' in bold letters.
An illustration of frequently asked questions related to understanding complicated grief and prolonged grief disorder after a child’s suicide, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder

“How to Know If I Have Prolonged Grief Disorder?” and More Frequently Asked Questions About Prolonged Grief Disorder

How to Know if I have Prolonged Grief Disorder?

You may have prolonged grief disorder (PGD) if you experience 
intense emotional pain, a sense of meaninglessness, and difficulty moving on with life for at least one year after a child’s death, especially after a suicide loss, according to Psychiatry.org, University of Colorado Anschutz, and the National Institutes of Health (NCBI).

Symptoms like avoiding reminders of the child, emotional numbness, intense loneliness, and difficulty returning to daily activities or relationships are key indicators. Given the complex nature of suicide loss, it is crucial to seek professional help from a doctor or therapist to accurately assess your grief. 

Key signs and symptoms of Prolonged Grief Disorder

Intense and persistent emotional pain: This includes overwhelming sadness, anger, or bitterness that significantly interferes with daily life.
Difficulty accepting the loss: You may feel disbelief that your child is gone or have trouble accepting the reality of the death.
Avoidance: You may actively avoid people, places, or things that are reminders of your child.
Sense of meaninglessness: You might feel that life is empty, meaningless, or that life is unbearable without your child.
Intense yearning: There may be an overwhelming desire to be with your child again.
Difficulty moving on: You may have trouble engaging in new activities or finding a sense of purpose or a reason to look forward to the future.
Emotional numbness: You may feel emotionally numb or disconnected from others. 

Additional signs that may point to Prolonged Grief Disorder

Suicidal thoughts or behaviors: If you are having thoughts of harming yourself, it is critical to seek immediate help by calling 999 or going to the nearest emergency room.
Social isolation: You may withdraw from friends, family, and social activities.
Difficulty with daily life: Everyday activities and responsibilities, such as work, school, or personal care, may become very challenging.
Physical symptoms: You might experience physical symptoms like fatigue, trouble sleeping, or changes in appetite.
Substance use: You may find yourself using more tobacco, alcohol, or other substances to cope with the pain. 

Navigating Grief After Losing a Child to Suicide: Essential Resources is a compassionate guide designed to support parents who are heartbroken from the loss of a child to suicide. This resource delves into the multifaceted emotions that accompany such profound grief, highlighting the crucial need for self-care, the value of seeking professional help, and the comfort of connecting with support groups. It offers coping strategies and thoughtful grief tips, such as engaging in creative pursuits, finding peace in nature, and honoring your child’s memory through meaningful memorials.

What to do next if I Have Symptoms of Prolonged Grief Disorder (Complicated Grief)


See a professional: A therapist, counselor, or doctor can help you determine if your grief is prolonged.
Be honest about your feelings: It is important to be open about the depth and intensity of your grief with a healthcare professional.
Get support: Don’t hesitate to reach out for help, even if it’s a friend, family member, or support group. 

A diagnosis of prolonged grief disorder (PGD) can only be made by a qualified mental health professional.

A diagnosis of prolonged grief disorder (PGD) can only be made by a qualified mental health professional. They would conduct a comprehensive evaluation to determine if your symptoms meet the specific diagnostic criteria outlined in the DSM-5-TR (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). 

Finding Immediate Support for Suicide Loss Survivors provides a comprehensive list of support resources, books for grieving a suicide loss, and poetry about losing a child to suicide. It aims to guide individuals through the complex emotions that often accompany such a tragic loss, offering a safe space where they can find both solace and understanding. The curated selection includes not only literature that addresses the multifaceted nature of grief but also practical suggestions for coping mechanisms, support groups, and online forums where survivors can share their experiences.

Red Leaves of a chokeberry in the fall, My Forever Son: Dylan's Story: 7 Warning Signs of Suicide Every College Parent Should Know


Key Criteria for Potential Prolonged Grief Disorder According to the DSM-5-TR

According to the DSM-5-TR, potential PGD diagnosis after the suicide loss of a child requires that the loss occurred at least 12 months ago for adults. Since the death, the individual must have experienced intense yearning or longing for their child and/or preoccupation with thoughts or memories of their child to a clinically significant degree for nearly every day for at least the last month. For at least the last month, the individual must also have experienced at least three other symptoms nearly every day, such as identity disruption, disbelief about the death, avoidance of reminders, intense emotional pain, difficulty with reintegration, emotional numbness, feeling life is meaningless, or intense loneliness. These symptoms must cause significant distress or impairment, exceed expected norms, and not be better explained by another condition.

Key Criteria for PGD Diagnosis (DSM-5-TR)

The diagnosis of PGD involves several criteria, which must be present for at least one year after the loss for adults (and 6 months for children/adolescents): 
Persistent Yearning/Preoccupation: You must experience intense yearning or a preoccupation with thoughts or memories of your child nearly every day for at least the last month.
Significant Impairment: The symptoms cause clinically significant distress or problems in your social, occupational, or other important areas of life (e.g., family life, daily functioning).
Exceeds Cultural Norms: The duration and severity of the grief response are not typical for your cultural or religious background.
Not Explained by Other Conditions: The symptoms are not better explained by another mental health condition, such as major depressive disorder or PTSD, or by substance use or a medical condition.
 
Specific Symptoms

In addition to the core criteria, at least three of the following symptoms must have been experienced to a clinically significant degree for most days for at least the last month: identity disruption, a marked sense of disbelief about the death, avoidance of reminders of the death, intense emotional pain, difficulty with reintegration into life, emotional numbness, feeling that life is meaningless without the deceased, and intense loneliness

Why a Professional Diagnosis Matters

Intense emotions like guilt, confusion, and shock are considered normal grief reactions after suicide loss, but PGD is distinct from typical grief and necessitates specific treatment. A mental health professional can differentiate between normal grief and PGD to ensure appropriate support is received

Why are Survivors of Suicide Loss, Especially Parents Who Lose a Child to Suicide, at a Higher Risk of Developing Prolonged Grief Disorder?

Specific Challenges after Suicide Loss

Survivors of suicide loss, particularly parents, are at a higher risk of developing Prolonged Grief Disorder (Complicated Grief) due to the unique trauma, which can include intense feelings of guilt, confusion, rejection, and shame.

“In Experiences of Parental Suicide-Bereavement: A Longitudinal Qualitative Analysis Over Two Years, Entilli and colleagues conducted interviews over a two-year period of parents who lost a child to suicide. They found that parents often shifted their focus from intense anger to blame and more reflecting reasoning. Some parents moved toward acceptance, while others struggled with depression and rumination over the loss. Some families exhibited maladaptive coping, such as avoidance and excessive working, while some engaged in more adaptive strategies, such as self-care and routine memorialization of their child.

While some [parents] continued to face challenges in making sense of the loss in their recovery, some began to find meaning and purpose in the loss of their child, showing resilience and personal growth. Patterns of gender differences were noted, with fathers leaning toward restoration-oriented activity (activity-oriented) while mothers exhibited a loss-oriented approach and expressed grief more openly. Some parents in this study were able to reframe their experience as an opportunity for growth, adopting positive lifestyle changes, while others highlighted the variable trajectory of grief.

The ripple effect of suicide-affected individuals and their families and friends is a powerful reminder of the imperative for mental health professionals to develop clear plans for how to manage suicide risk in their work with clients – whether they are providing services to individuals in solo practice, as part of a group practice or a larger hospital system or behavioral health agency.

The aftermath of suicide touches the lives of everyone who knew the individual affected by the event, far beyond the nuclear family of the deceased. There is no one-size-fits-all in the journey to healing. In addressing the ripple effect of suicide loss, mental health professionals can offer both individual and systems-level support to survivors.” (Glen P. Davis, MD, Behavioral Health News, 2025)

Support for Parents Grieving a Child’s Suicide: Guidance, Resources, and Healingis a guide offering support and resources for parents grieving the loss of a child to suicide. It emphasizes seeking professional help, joining support groups, and practicing self-care. The guide includes book recommendations, support organizations, and a glossary of terms to aid in understanding and navigating grief. Compassionate support is available to help you with your journey.

What is Complicated Grief After the Death of a Child?

“The death of a child is one of the most difficult experience a person ever faces. Taking good care of a child is often the most important thing in a parent’s life. Parents begin to care for a child as early as conception as they imagine what the child will be like. A child’s death triggers feelings of care-giving failure. The loss of a child can sever a parent’s feeling of connection to the future. Losing a child often feels to parents like losing a part of themselves. Self-blaming thoughts can derail the adaptation process and lead to complicated grief. The highest rates of complicated grief occur in parents who have lost children.

Intense emotions like sadness, anger, guilt and despair invade the lives of parents coping with a child’s death and these may be difficult to regulate. Life is transformed and may seem empty and confusing. Answering a simple question such as “How many children do you have?” is suddenly a problem. Bereaved
parents typically wrestle with difficult questions such as “Why did this happen?” or “Why didn’t I prevent it?” or, sometimes, “Why was my child so reckless or negligent?” These kinds of thoughts and feelings contribute to development of complicated grief and need to be resolved in order for grief to find its rightful place in a parent’s life.

A bereaved couple may find themselves unable to support each other after a painful shared loss. Their different ways of grieving may seem jarring to each other. One parent may long to talk about the child and their feelings, while the other parent may feel determined to avoid these very discussions. Conflicting
needs can deprive a couple of the support they need from each other causing stress in the relationship and adding to the pain of the loss.

A parent may cherish memories of the child or long for the memories they had hoped to build. Parents may wonder if it is right to feel joy after the loss of a child. They may question whether restoration of a happy, satisfying life is appropriate
since their child has been deprived of these. Those who can’t imagine a meaningful life or find a way to restore their sense of purpose, joy and satisfaction may be suffering from complicated grief. If so, complicated grief treatment holds the promise of hope. ” Complicated Grief, Columbia.edu)

When Love Isn’t Enough: “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand” explores the complexities of suicide and includes a compassionate treatise written by the author, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” challenging the notion that it is a choice. The treatise, “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand,” emphasizes the inevitability of death, regardless of the cause, and the limitations of love in preventing it. The author of the treatise “Ode to Suicide: That We Might Understand” and this article, “When Love Isn’t Enough,” Beth Brown shares her personal journey of grief after losing her son to suicide, finding solace in writing and nature photography.
Glacier National Park mountains, water, and white puffy clouds with hint of blue sky suggesting hope and healing in the midst of grief, My Forever Son, Memorial Day: A Mother's Reflection of Loss, Love, and Unimaginable Grief

A decorative pot with vibrant red nasturtium flowers and lush green leaves, set against a blurred garden background, symbolizes the beauty of resilience in the face of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide
A vibrant pot of flowering nasturtiums symbolizes the beauty of resilience in the face of grief, My Forever Son, Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Professional Resources

Online Directory for Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress

After A Suicide Resource Directory: Coping with Grief, Trauma, and Distress
http://www.personalgriefcoach.net
This online directory links people who are grieving after a suicide death to resources and information.

Alliance of Hope for Suicide Survivors
http://www.allianceofhope.org
This organization for survivors of suicide loss provides information sheets, a blog, and a community forum through which survivors can share with each other.

Friends for Survival
http://www.friendsforsurvival.org
This organization is for suicide loss survivors and professionals who work with them. It produces a monthly newsletter and runs the Suicide Loss Helpline (1-800-646-7322). It also published Pathways to Purpose and Hope, a guide to building a community-based suicide survivor support program.

HEARTBEAT: Grief Support Following Suicide
http://heartbeatsurvivorsaftersuicide.org
This organization has chapters providing support groups for survivors of suicide loss in Colorado and some other states. Its website provides information sheets for survivors and a leader’s guide on how to start a new chapter of HEARTBEAT.

Resources and Support Groups

Parents of Suicides and Friends & Families of Suicides (POS-FFOS)
http://www.pos-ffos.com
This website provides a public message board called Suicide Grief Support Forum, a listserv for parents, a separate listserv for others, and an online chat room for survivors of suicide loss.

Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS)
https://www.taps.org/suicide
This organization provides resources and programs for people grieving the loss of a loved one who died while serving in the U.S. armed forces or as a result of their service. It has special resources and programs for suicide loss survivors.

United Survivors
https://unitesurvivors.org/
This organization is a place where people who have experienced suicide loss, suicide attempts, and suicidal thoughts and feelings, and their friends and families, can connect to use their lived experience to advocate for policy, systems, and cultural change.

Professional Organizations

American Association of Suicidology
suicidology.org • (202) 237-2280
Promotes public awareness, education and training for professionals, and sponsors an annual Healing After Suicide conference for suicide loss survivors. In addition to the conference, they offer a coping with suicide grief handbook by Jeffrey Jackson. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

The Compassionate Friends
compassionatefriends.org • (877) 969-0010
Offers resources for families after the death of a child. They sponsor support groups, newsletters and online support groups throughout the country, as well as an annual national conference for bereaved families.

The Dougy Center
The National Center for Grieving Children & Families
dougy.org • (503) 775-5683
Publishes extensive resources for helping children and teens who are grieving a death including death by suicide. Resources include the “Children, Teens and Suicide Loss” booklet created in partnership with AFSP. This booklet is also available in Spanish.

Link’s National Resource Center for Suicide Prevention and Aftercare
thelink.org/nrc-for-suicide-prevention-aftercar • 404-256-2919
Dedicated to reaching out to those whose lives have been impacted by suicide and connecting them to available resources.

Tragedy Assistance Programs for Survivors (TAPS)
taps.org/suicide • (800) 959-TAPS (8277)
Provides comfort, care and resources to all those grieving the death of a military loved one through a national peer support network and connection to grief resources, all at no cost to surviving families and loved ones.

LOSS
losscs.org
Offers support groups, remembrance events, companioning, suicide postvention and prevention education, and training to other communities interested in developing or enhancing their suicide postvention and prevention efforts.

Online resources

Alliance of Hope
allianceofhope.org
Provides a 24/7 online forum for suicide loss survivors.

Help Guide
helpguide.org
Provides resources and tips for how to navigate the loss of someone to suicide.

Parents of Suicides (POS) – Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS)
pos-ffos.com
An internet community to connect parents, friends, and family that have lost someone to suicide.

SAVE: Suicide Awareness Voices of Education
save.org/programs/suicide-loss-support • (952) 946-7998
Hosts resources for suicide loss survivor including a support group database, newsletter, survivor conference and the Named Memorial Program, which offers a special way to honor your loved one.

Siblings Survivors of Suicide Loss
siblingsurvivors.com
Provides resources and a platform to connect with others that have lost a sibling to suicide.

Finding professional care and support

Find a mental health provider

Find a provider for prolonged grief

Find additional resources for marginalized communities

Crisis Services

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
988lifeline.org
Call or text 988 (press 1 for Veterans, 2 for Spanish, 3 for LGBTQ+ youth and young adults) or chat 988lifeline.org
A 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With crisis centers across the country, their mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential.

Crisis Text Line
crisistextline.org
Text TALK to 741-741 for English
Text AYUDA to 741-741 for Spanish
Provides free, text-based mental health support and crisis intervention by empowering a community of trained volunteers to support people in their moments of need, 24/7.

Support Groups

A stack of books related to mental health and suicide prevention placed on a wooden table, with a blue mug and green plants in the background.
A collection of books focused on understanding grief, suicide, and mental health support, My Forever Son, Finding Support After Losing a Child to Suicide

Books for Understanding Suicide And Mental Health

An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness
Kay Redfield Jamison, Ph.D., Alfred A. Knopf, 1995. In this memoir, an international authority on Manic Depression (Bipolar Disorder describes her own struggle since adolescence with the disorder, and how it has shaped her life.

Darkness Visible
William Styron, Random House, 1990. A powerful and moving first-hand account of what depression feels like to the sufferer.

Devastating Losses: How Parents Cope with the Death of a Child to Suicide or Drugs
William Feigelman, Ph.D., John Jordan, Ph.D., John McIntosh, Ph.D., Beverly Feigelman, LCSW, Springer Publishing, 2012. This book provides useful avenues for future research on suicide loss and offers new insights into the grief process that follows the death of a child, both in the short term and years after a loss.  Please note that, given its academic tone, the book is better suited to clinicians and educators than to recently bereaved lay readers.

Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide
Kay Redfield Jamison, Ph.D., Alfred A. Knopf, 1999. Kay Redfield Jamison’s in-depth psychological and scientific exploration of suicide traces the network of reasons underlying suicide, including the factors that interact to cause suicide, and outlines the evolving treatments available through modern medicine.

The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression
Andrew Solomon, Scribner, 2001.Winner of the National Book Award, this book shares the author’s story of chronic depression, and places depression in a broader social context.

Why People Die by Suicide
Thomas Joiner, Ph.D., Harvard University Press, 2005.
Drawing on extensive clinical and epidemiological evidence, as well as personal experience, the author, who lost his father to suicide, identifies three factors that mark those most at risk of considering, attempting, or dying by suicide.

Book Recommendation: ‘A Handbook for Coping with Suicide Grief’ by Jeffrey Jackson, providing support for survivors of suicide loss, My Forever Son

Cover of a handbook titled 'A handbook for coping with suicide grief' by Jeffrey Jackson, featuring illustrations of people and greenery, My Forever Son
Book Recommendation: ‘A Handbook for Coping with Suicide Grief’ by Jeffrey Jackson, providing support for survivors of suicide loss, My Forever Son
A close-up of a vibrant red rose with droplets of water on its petals, accompanied by the title 'Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide' by Beth Brown,
Book cover of ‘Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide‘ by Beth Brown, featuring a vibrant rose, symbolizing remembrance and hope, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents’ Resource

Books

  • Beal, Karyl Chastain (2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018). Faces of Suicide, Volumes One to Five.
  • Brown, Beth (2023) Bury My Heart: 19 Poems for Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide
  • Cacciatore, Joanne (2017). Bearing the Unbearable. Wisdom Publications.
  • Clark, Ann (2020). Gone to Suicide. A mom’s truth on heartbreak, transformation and prevention. Iuniverse.
  • Collins, Eileen Vorbach (2023). Love in the Archives. a patchwork of true stories about suicide loss. Apprentice House Press.
  • Cross, Tracey (2013). Suicide among gifted children and adolescents. Understanding the suicidal mind. Prufrock Press.
  • Dougy Center, The (2001). After a Suicide: An Activity Book for Grieving Kids. Dougy Center.
  • Estes, Clarissa Pinkola (1988). The Faithful Gardener. HarperCollinsSanFrancisco.
  • Fine, Carla (1997). No Time to Say Goodbye. Surviving the suicide of a loved one. Broadway Books.
  • Heilmann, Lena M.Q. (2019). Still with Us. Voices of Sibling Suicide Loss Survivors. BDI Publishers.
  • Hickman, Martha Whitmore (1994). Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief. William Morrow Paperbacks
  • Jamison, Kay Redfield (2000). Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide. Vintage.
  • Johnson, Julie Tallard (1994). Hidden Victims, Hidden Healers. An eight-stage healing process for families and friends of the mentally ill. Pema Publications.
  • Joiner, Thomas (2005). Why People Die by Suicide. Harvard University Press
  • Joiner, Thomas (2010). Myths About Suicide. Harvard University Press.
  • Kushner, Harold S. (2004). When Bad Things Happen to Good People. Anchor Books
  • O’Connor, Mary-Francis (2022). The Grieving Brain. HarperOne.
  • Rasmussen, Christina (2019). Second Firsts. Hay House Inc.
  • Shapiro, Larry (2020). Brain Pain. Giving insight to children who have lost a family member or a loved one to suicide. Safe Haven Books.
  • Wickersham, Julie (2009). The Suicide Index: Putting My Father’s Death in Order. Mariner Books.
A woman in a brown coat kneels beside a grave, visibly emotional, with a vase of red and white flowers placed on the gravestone that reads 'SON.' The background shows a cemetery with multiple gravestones, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents' Resource
A grieving parent visits their child’s grave, reflecting on loss and remembrance, My Forever Son, Finding Hope After Losing a Child to Suicide: Parents’ Resource

Memorial Sites

NEWEST POSTS

For Parents

“White Peonies in Bloom”: A Devotional for Grieving Parents

“White Peonies in Bloom”: A Devotional for Grieving Parents Introduction “White Peonies in Bloom”: A Devotional for Grieving Parents offers a deeply empathetic devotional reflection for grieving parents titled ‘White Peonies in Bloom.’ This tender piece gently explores the exquisite beauty of white peonies, serving as a comforting reminder for parents who are enduring the…

Read More

Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide

Guilt After Losing a Child to Suicide Guilt in Suicide Loss: Painful and Persistent Guilt is one of the most painful and persistent parts of suicide loss. Parents replay conversations, missed signs, and imagined alternate endings—believing they should have prevented the unpreventable. Why Parents Feel Guilt Guilt Is Not Proof of Failure Guilt is grief…

Read More

Losing a Child to Suicide: A Parent’s Guide to Grief

Losing a Child to Suicide: A Parent’s Guide to Grief Early grief, understanding suicide loss, and survival A Loss Unlike Any Other Losing a child to suicide is a loss unlike any other. It shatters assumptions, fractures identity, and leaves parents searching for answers that may never come. If you are here, you are not…

Read More

“If You Just Lost Your Child”

If You Just Lost Your Child to Suicide Summary “If You Just Lost Your Child” is a compassionate guide for parents who have just lost a child to suicide. You are not alone. Gentle guidance, understanding, and support. You Are Not Alone Here You are not broken. You are grieving.If you have just lost your…

Read More

Something went wrong. Please refresh the page and/or try again.

red rose in full bloom close up

Get new Posts delivered to your inbox.

Home » Blog » Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide

Discover more from My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide

Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.

By Beth Brown

Musician. Writer. Literary Connoisseur. Always writing, scribbling poetry, turning feelings into words. "Break my heart even further" can't ever be done, for I lost my heart the night I lost my son. Come find me writing at My Forever Son: Grief, Hope, and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide.

At the whim of Most Beloved Cat, I write as she tattles on the garden cats. Find Most Beloved Cat sharing her stories at Gardens at Effingham: Where Cats Tell the Tales

16 replies on “Understanding Prolonged Grief Disorder After Suicide”

Leave a Reply

Discover more from My Forever Son: Grief and Healing After Losing a Child to Suicide

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading