Tag: parents dealing with grief after teenage suicide

5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 27, 2022
1 Comment on 5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay

Red and Green Leaves of a Burning Bush in Fall

5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay For Here Now I Stay These dark, incessant droning on of days, months, years, and most sadly of all, a lifetime, more so carve in us (should we choose and choose we must, for grief is not so clearly delineated in its outcome), […]

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Remembering Dylan: Twenty Years

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date September 14, 2022
No Comments on Remembering Dylan: Twenty Years

Remembering Dylan:Twenty Years Twenty Years (Written by my sister, Linda) “Twenty years: from birth, from before birth treasured and loved, Dylan. Held now in God’s hands, held always in God’s hands but oh how I wish him back. In 1991, Beth called to share the news that she was pregnant. Beth had some health issues […]

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Summer, Forever Summer

Lemon Balm Herb in Late Summer

Summer, Forever Summer There is a common belief that suicide occurs most often in the cold months, especially around Thanksgiving, Christmas and other winter holidays. This is actually a misconception, however, as suicide rates often increase during the spring and summer. Centerstone, How Summer Affects Suicide Rates Cusp of Summer The end of June through […]

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Loving Him Past His Pain

Lilac in Bloom in Spring

Loving Him Past His Pain October Shadows A gorgeous fall afternoon, early eveningSun slants wideShadows cast and scatter across a stone wall Walked a bit ago to the cul-de-sac and then down to the field, following the sun, finding the sun shadowing me, feeling the sun trailing behind. Warm still, though only 60 and chilly. […]

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Travel On My Brave Soldier-A Poem of Hope

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 30, 2022
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Heart-shaped Red Roses Against Stone Wall

Travel On Travel on my brave soldier Travel on wild one Take heart winged warrior Unencumbered take great strides. Ride dragon’s wings forever Stay free here evermore Follow infinity to the heavens Travel on to safer shores. ©Beth Brown, 2022 First time here? Listen to a Song

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Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 11, 2022
1 Comment on Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Red Rose in June, My Forever Son

Beat Still My Heart Beat Still My Heart Beat still my heart Beat still my mind Weary though thou art, Carry his love along with thine Though heavy on thy shoulders Crost fields throughout all time. In the deepest dark of the bleakest night, If light there be, the dark shuts it out. Around you […]

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The Unbearable Ache of Memorial Dates

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 1, 2022
No Comments on The Unbearable Ache of Memorial Dates

The Unbearable Ache of Memorial Dates Now I know what day it is I wish I didn’t I am not in the moment Indeed, I am not Here really Here anywhere really Lost, just so terribly, terribly, terribly lost Wanting to save you Dylan All over again Grief Remembers What Time Cannot Forget: Memorial Dates […]

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Year 3 Memorial Date After Suicide Loss: Living Backwards Going Forward

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date May 5, 2022
No Comments on Year 3 Memorial Date After Suicide Loss: Living Backwards Going Forward

Living Backwards Going Forward I am aware, the further I come along this grief journey, the less I live forward. My Forever Son That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back Should’ve, Would’ve, Could’ve, If I’d only Come to See, That might I future forward live To see all eternity. That I might know […]

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Find Hope Here: Poems of Love, Loss, and Losing a Child

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 8, 2022
1 Comment on Find Hope Here: Poems of Love, Loss, and Losing a Child

Pink and White Apple Blossoms in spring, My Forever Son

A Lullaby for My Son, “As I Tuck You In”

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“Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”-A Poem about Losing a Child to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date February 3, 2022
2 Comments on “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon”-A Poem about Losing a Child to Suicide

"Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon" My Forever Son

Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon A Poem for Dylan by Beth Brown And once upon a blue-sky moon, We sailed our ships in your bedroom, With stars for light, we fled the dark But the lightening flashed, And the sky grew dark. You tucked away your childhood dreams On wings that soared beyond infinity, Your […]

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Surviving Suicide Grief: “Does the Pain Ever End?”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date January 20, 2022
6 Comments on Surviving Suicide Grief: “Does the Pain Ever End?”

The Pain Does Change “To those of you that still feel you aren’t even sure you want to behere and you can’t imagine ever being happy again. The pain doeschange, it softens. You will want to live again and be able to enjoylife again. It will never be like before but the crushing, allconsuming pain […]

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Coping with Regret and Guilt After Your Child’s Death by Suicide: “I Want to Believe”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date January 8, 2022
7 Comments on Coping with Regret and Guilt After Your Child’s Death by Suicide: “I Want to Believe”

I Want to Believe– I Want to Believe- –that with enough love and laughter, books and reading, friends and family, children grow up to be happy –the stage is set early for dreams to come true: Skies dazzle in brilliant blue, clouds drift idly, stretches of pastures and woodlands lend serenity -all families stick together–even […]

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Struggling with Guilt After Your Child’s Suicide: “A True Tale of 2 Mothers”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date December 21, 2021
3 Comments on Struggling with Guilt After Your Child’s Suicide: “A True Tale of 2 Mothers”

Struggling with Guilt in Suicide Grief Parents of children who die by suicide often battle anadded type of guilt. Even if they do not blame themselvesfor not directly intervening in the suicidal act, they often feelguilt over some perceived mistake in raising their children.“Where did I go wrong?,” “I pushed them too hard.” and“If we […]

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Losing A Child to Suicide: A Sad Welcome

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date January 20, 2017
5 Comments on Losing A Child to Suicide: A Sad Welcome

Daddy Cat and Red Roses

When you lose your child, there is nothingness, the descent into the abyss of losing not just your child, but yourself as well. Beth Brown, My Forever Son In the Beginning Not my child-This has all been a big mistake. Surely this isn’t-couldn’t be true. My Forever Son Insides feel like outsides, and suddenly, nothing is real. Or matters–Desperate, […]

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Coping with Suicide Loss Grief Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

Suicide: It Never Lets Go

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 29, 2015
No Comments on Suicide: It Never Lets Go

Rain Puddles Beneath Hemlocks

Grief Begins After Losing My Only Child to Suicide Dying Inside. Holding my breath. Pain on the inhale. Pain in the exhale. Sharp pierce of pain. Heart pain. Constant. Mighty. Rhythmic. The rhythm now of my life, my lifeblood stifled, plugged, narrowed, struggling, constricted by this undertow of grieving. I’d like to think I’ve made […]

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Coping with Unfathomable Loss After the Suicide of My Son

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 22, 2015
3 Comments on Coping with Unfathomable Loss After the Suicide of My Son

Where I Am Now after 3 Years of Grieving the Loss of My Son 1,095 Days Out and Still Counting I am the mother of a suicide. And in 4 days, Dylan will have died by suicide 3 years ago. 1,095 days ago. A lifetime, and at the same time, no time at all. Some […]