Tag: grief after losing a child to suicide

When Do Suicides Go Up? Summer, Forever Summer

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date March 25, 2023
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Lemon Balm Herb in Late Summer

When Do Suicides Go Up? Summer, Forever Summer There is a common belief that suicide occurs most often in the cold months, especially around Thanksgiving, Christmas and other winter holidays. This is actually a misconception, however, as suicide rates often increase during the spring and summer. Centerstone, How Summer Affects Suicide Rates Cusp of Summer […]

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Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date December 13, 2022
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Living in the Glare Listen to Your Narrative It isn’t wrong, this narrative of yours. Isn’t something to be fixed. Adjusted. Changed. Rewritten. God knows you’d rewrite your narrative if you could. Consider the whole thing a tumultuous, torrid first draft. A rough sketch ill-constructed. The consequence lacking intention. Not giving words, shapes, ideas, even […]

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“Bruised and Wounded: Understanding Suicide”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date November 11, 2022
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A few scattered leaves in fall on brick sidewalk

All death unsettles us, but suicide… brings with it an ache, a chaos, a darkness, and a stigma that has to be experienced to be believed. Ronald Rolheiser Struggling to Understand Suicide Ronald Rolheiser writes a great deal about the suicide. He lends an understanding and spiritual perspective to suicide, and in so doing, removes […]

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Surviving Your Child’s Suicide: Support, Resources, Hope

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 22, 2022
12 Comments on Surviving Your Child’s Suicide: Support, Resources, Hope

Books and Resources

The following resources, book lists, narratives from parents who have lost a child to suicide, support groups, and more are meant to be a resource bank. Many have helped me keep on keeping on these past nine years of grieving.

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Beyond Surviving: Suggestions for Survivors

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date September 21, 2022
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Pink Ground Roses

Beyond Surviving: Suggestions for Survivors by Iris M. Bolton (Especially for newly bereaved parents) 2. Struggle with “why” it happened until you no longer need to know “why” or until YOU are satisfied with partial answers. 3. Know you may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your feelings but that all your feelings are normal. […]

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Remembering Dylan: Twenty Years

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date September 14, 2022
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Remembering Dylan:Twenty Years Twenty Years (Written by my sister, Linda) “Twenty years: from birth, from before birth treasured and loved, Dylan. Held now in God’s hands, held always in God’s hands but oh how I wish him back. In 1991, Beth called to share the news that she was pregnant. Beth had some health issues […]

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Child Loss to Suicide Grief Memorial Dates Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

Memorial Day-Echoes that Haunt

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date August 28, 2022
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Here Comes the 25th Most days, I cannot imagine my life without my son. Perhaps this is why starting my day is so difficult. It isn’t always like this, and after two years and almost 11 months, I am sometimes able to greet my day with gratitude and balance, a centeredness that defies my tragic […]

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Travel On My Brave Soldier-A Poem of Hope

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 30, 2022
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Heart-shaped Red Roses Against Stone Wall

Travel On Travel on my brave soldier Travel on wild one Take heart winged warrior Unencumbered take great strides. Ride dragon’s wings forever Stay free here evermore Follow infinity to the heavens Travel on to safer shores. ©Beth Brown, 2022 First time here? Listen to a Song

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Child Loss to Suicide Grief Memorial Dates Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

Memorial Day-Echoes that Haunt

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 2, 2022
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Lavender Heirloom Roses

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I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing: Grief After Losing My Son to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date April 6, 2022
1 Comment on I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing: Grief After Losing My Son to Suicide

Daffodils in Spring

I Only Hurt When I’m Breathing “I only hurt when I’m breathing,” a random post on social media, anonymous, yet so completely relevant to this grieving of losing a child. I found a Mother’s Day card a few weeks ago. Dylan’s last Mother’s Day card to me in May of 2012. (I wasn’t looking for […]

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Hold Onto Hope-Grief Comes to Stay

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date February 14, 2022
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Daddy Cat in Snow, My Forever Son

When you lose your child, there is nothingness, the descent into the abyss of losing not just your child, but also yourself Beth, Dylan’s Mom, My Forever Son Grief is Unfinished Others can come alongside us for awhile, but our journey into the deep, dark night must be our own. Here, we rally against the darkness, awaken our soul’s […]

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If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You-A Poem About Losing a Child

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date February 8, 2022
3 Comments on If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You-A Poem About Losing a Child

White Swan, My Forever Son

If Only a Mother’s Love Could Have Saved You Bones bear girth where once, wisdom birthed you Love lost in the framing of art for art’s sake (because and as if) a mother’s love could have saved you– been there to catch you fall tears stilled by the heavens stars deep as dark’s cry […]

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Rising Up-Because Love Lives Forever

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date November 12, 2021
2 Comments on Rising Up-Because Love Lives Forever

Yellow Rose in Full Bloom

Rising Up because… Love lives forever. My son lives yet still. I will be with Dylan again. As long I live, Dylan lives too. Dylan lives on through all that I am. Dylan’s voice is now my own. Beth Brown, My Forever Son Rising Up because… I will not let the world forget my son […]

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About Dylan

“Sometimes I touch the things you used to touch, looking for echoes of your fingers.” Iain Thomas A Poem about Losing a Child-Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon A Poem for Dylan by Beth Brown And once upon a blue-sky moon, We sailed our ships in your bedroom, With stars for […]

Child Loss to Suicide Coping with Suicide Loss Grief Healing Hope and Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

The Shape of My Grief at 3 Years: Hope and Healing

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date February 7, 2016
No Comments on The Shape of My Grief at 3 Years: Hope and Healing

Red and Pink Ground Roses

The Shape of My Grief 3 years, 3 months My son, Dylan, was just barely 20 years old when he took his life, and I have all of those same unanswered questions rattling around inside me, all of me, even though it’s now been 3 years, 3 months since his death. I like to think […]

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Coping with Suicide Loss Grief Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

Suicide: It Never Lets Go

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 29, 2015
No Comments on Suicide: It Never Lets Go

Rain Puddles Beneath Hemlocks

Grief Begins After Losing My Only Child to Suicide Dying Inside. Holding my breath. Pain on the inhale. Pain in the exhale. Sharp pierce of pain. Heart pain. Constant. Mighty. Rhythmic. The rhythm now of my life, my lifeblood stifled, plugged, narrowed, struggling, constricted by this undertow of grieving. I’d like to think I’ve made […]