Category: Reflections after Suicide Loss

Poems for A Weary Heart: Child Loss

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date March 20, 2023
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Poems of Grief, Hope, and Healing After Child Loss to Suicide Poems of grief, hope, and healing after child loss to suicide reflect a decade of finding my way back (Losing a Child to Suicide: A Sad Welcome) after losing my son to suicide. Reflecting the deep sorrow, grief, and confusion left behind after losing […]

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A Poem About Losing My Child: Sorrow Buried in Love

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date December 22, 2022
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Red Rose in June

A Poem About Losing My Child: Sorrow Buried in Love Sorrow Buried in Love So swish to sway to sweet lullaby, Baby will fall in dark of the night. Rocking cradle to grave turning truth upside down: Parents die first leaving children behind. In a world topsy-turvy that cannot make sense, Sacred trust shines the […]

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Living in the Glare of My Son’s Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date December 13, 2022
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Living in the Glare Listen to Your Narrative It isn’t wrong, this narrative of yours. Isn’t something to be fixed. Adjusted. Changed. Rewritten. God knows you’d rewrite your narrative if you could. Consider the whole thing a tumultuous, torrid first draft. A rough sketch ill-constructed. The consequence lacking intention. Not giving words, shapes, ideas, even […]

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“Bruised and Wounded: Understanding Suicide”

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date November 11, 2022
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A few scattered leaves in fall on brick sidewalk

All death unsettles us, but suicide… brings with it an ache, a chaos, a darkness, and a stigma that has to be experienced to be believed. Ronald Rolheiser Struggling to Understand Suicide Ronald Rolheiser writes a great deal about the suicide. He lends an understanding and spiritual perspective to suicide, and in so doing, removes […]

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5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 27, 2022
1 Comment on 5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay

Red and Green Leaves of a Burning Bush in Fall

5 Years of Grief After Suicide Loss: For Here Now, I Stay For Here Now I Stay These dark, incessant droning on of days, months, years, and most sadly of all, a lifetime, more so carve in us (should we choose and choose we must, for grief is not so clearly delineated in its outcome), […]

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Help, Hope, Healing After Suicide Loss: Support, Books, Resources

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 22, 2022
20 Comments on Help, Hope, Healing After Suicide Loss: Support, Books, Resources

Daffodils in Spring

If You’ve Lost a Child to Suicide, These Resources May Be Helpful Few things can so devastate us as the suicide of a loved one, especially of one’s own child. Fr Ron Rolheiser Seven Resources for Support If you are having thoughts of suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988. (Or 1-800-273-8255 (TALK). […]

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A Poem of Love, Loss, and Healing: Rain Comes to Heal Us All

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date October 21, 2022
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After the Rain

A Healing Poem of Love, Loss, and Forgiveness: Rain Comes to Heal Us All Rain Comes to Heal Us All Rain comes to heal us all, Falling tears from a sky of love, Remembering even when earth forgets To nurture all that we cannot forgive, Bringing love remembered to restore Even flowers that forget how […]

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Remembering

Yellow Rose in Full Bloom

Remembering Even though this house hasn’t been hers for at least five years… Dylan Brown Latest from the Blog

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Grandparents’ Grief After Suicide Loss of Grandchild

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date September 29, 2022
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Lemon Balm Herb in Summer

A Grandparent’s Grief The Family Table I was with my mother when she purchased the sturdy, long, pine table. With two leaves, one for each end of the table, this table would be big enough for our small, close-knit family. My sister and her family, including her two children, plus my parents, plus room now […]

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Remembering Dylan: Twenty Years

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date September 14, 2022
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Remembering Dylan:Twenty Years Twenty Years (Written by my sister, Linda) “Twenty years: from birth, from before birth treasured and loved, Dylan. Held now in God’s hands, held always in God’s hands but oh how I wish him back. In 1991, Beth called to share the news that she was pregnant. Beth had some health issues […]

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Guilt in Grief: 3 Questions to Ask Yourself

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date August 31, 2022
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Guilt in Grief That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back Should’ve, would’ve, could’ve, If I’d only come to see, That might I future forward live To see all eternity. That I might know when and where somehow, And here and now then see, To erase the dark and stay the day, To bring back […]

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Memorial Day-Echoes that Haunt

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date August 28, 2022
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Here Comes the 25th Most days, I cannot imagine my life without my son. Perhaps this is why starting my day is so difficult. It isn’t always like this, and after two years and almost 11 months, I am sometimes able to greet my day with gratitude and balance, a centeredness that defies my tragic […]

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Memorial Dates: Reflections at 8 Years After Losing My Son

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date July 15, 2022
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Red, White, and Purple Petunias

Memorial Dates “To those of you that still feel you aren’t even sure you want to behere and you can’t imagine ever being happy again. The pain doeschange, it softens. You will want to live again and be able to enjoylife again. It will never be like before but the crushing, allconsuming pain you feel […]

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A Glimpse of Hope: “Letting Go” In Grief

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date July 15, 2022
No Comments on A Glimpse of Hope: “Letting Go” In Grief

A Glimpse of Hope Some days, I lift my hands, my arms high, offering my child up to the hope that I will again join him–someday. I dance my prayers, draw with pastels my feelings, watch my “healing,” as best can be, ebb more than it, as in the beginning, really the first 18 months, overwhelm and […]

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Loving Him Past His Pain

Lilac in Bloom in Spring

Loving Him Past His Pain October Shadows A gorgeous fall afternoon, early eveningSun slants wideShadows cast and scatter across a stone wall Walked a bit ago to the cul-de-sac and then down to the field, following the sun, finding the sun shadowing me, feeling the sun trailing behind. Warm still, though only 60 and chilly. […]

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Travel On My Brave Soldier-A Poem of Hope

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 30, 2022
No Comments on Travel On My Brave Soldier-A Poem of Hope

Heart-shaped Red Roses Against Stone Wall

Travel On Travel on my brave soldier Travel on wild one Take heart winged warrior Unencumbered take great strides. Ride dragon’s wings forever Stay free here evermore Follow infinity to the heavens Travel on to safer shores. ©Beth Brown, 2022 First time here? Listen to a Song

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The First Year of Grief After Losing My Son

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 29, 2022
2 Comments on The First Year of Grief After Losing My Son

Red Rose Buds in Spring

Instrumental Guitar Music (Written and Performed by Beth Brown, Dylan’s Mom) Does the Pain Ever End? To those of you that still feel you aren’t even sure you want to be here and you can’t imagine ever being happy again. The pain does change, it softens. You will want to live again and be able […]

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Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 11, 2022
1 Comment on Beat Still My Heart: A Poem About Losing My Son to Suicide

Red Rose in June, My Forever Son

Beat Still My Heart Beat Still My Heart Beat still my heart Beat still my mind Weary though thou art, Carry his love along with thine Though heavy on thy shoulders Crost fields throughout all time. In the deepest dark of the bleakest night, If light there be, the dark shuts it out. Around you […]

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“Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep”–Poem and Song

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 4, 2022
No Comments on “Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep”–Poem and Song

Photograph of sun, clouds, and sky from an aerial view

“Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep” By Mary Elizabeth Frye I give you this one thought to keep- I am with you still. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow, I am the diamond glints on snow, I am the sunglight on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn […]

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Child Loss to Suicide Grief Memorial Dates Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss

Memorial Day-Echoes that Haunt

Post author By Beth Brown
Post date June 2, 2022
No Comments on Memorial Day-Echoes that Haunt

Lavender Heirloom Roses

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