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Child Loss Coping with suicide Depression and Mental Illness Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Suicide loss

I Lost My Son to Suicide-Here’s How I Survive Suicide Grief

“Few things can so devastate us as the suicide of a loved one, especially of one’s own child.” Fr Ron Rolheiser Mother of a Teenage Suicide I am the mother of a young suicide. Changed, forever changed, by the death of my 20-year-old son, Dylan Andrew Brown, 3 years and nearly 4 months ago. I […]

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Child Loss Grief Healing Hope Memorial Dates Memories and Stories Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss Suicide loss

Memorial Dates-When Grief Lingers After Losing A Child to Suicide, A Letter to My Son

When Grief Lingers and Love Lives Forever- A Letter to My Son On Your 9th Memorial Date How to begin-where to begin. Infinity, I suppose, from whence we all come and to which we all go. God I miss you Dylan. More than heart can tell, more than words can express, oceans wide and galaxies […]

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Books and Resources Grief Guilt Healing

Got Grief? Myths, Fallacies, and Expectations

“What if we never ‘get over’ certain deaths, or our childhoods? What if the idea that we should have by now, or will, is a great palace lie? What if we’re not supposed to? What if it takes a life time…?” Anne Lamott “It isn’t true that you have to get over it. It isn’t […]

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The Shape of My Grief

Dylan Andrew Brown, 18 years young, gifted student, musician, friend, son My son, Dylan, was just barely 20 years old when he took his life, and I have all of those same unanswered questions rattling around inside me, all of me, even though it’s now been 3 years, 3 months since his death. I like […]

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Letting Go: A Sketch of Love Against a Life’s Etching of Grief

Even when the tidal waves of grief cease, the ebb and flow, the surge and deep darkness that is the ocean, that, alas, is grief, persists. Hope rests in the distance, skyward, arcing, streaming glimpses of what’s yet to come–then, there, at that moment, the final lifting up and breaking free of the weight of […]

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"Why?" Books and Resources Coping with suicide Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

The Pain of Suicide: It’s Not About Wanting to Die, It’s About Wanting the Pain to Stop

The Pain of Suicide Know you can survive; you may not think so, but you can. Iris M. Bolton, “Beyond Surviving: Suggestions for Survivors” 10 Commonalities of Suicide Below are 10 commonalities of suicide, identified by suicide expert, Edwin Shneidman, author of The Suicidal Mind. 10 Commonalities of Suicide The common purpose of suicide is […]

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Child Loss Coping with Loss Memories and Stories Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss Suicide loss

About Dylan

My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After the Death of My Son By Suicide And once upon a blue-sky moon, We sailed our ships in your bedroom, With stars for light, we fled the dark But the lightening flashed, And the sky grew dark. Beth Brown, “Once Upon a Blue-Sky Moon” “Sometimes I […]

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"Why?" Grief Memories and Stories Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Reflections after Suicide Loss Suicide loss

Why? After the Suicide of My Son-A Mother Remembers

The beat of my heart shaped by you. The song of you which still now I sing.   And yet perhaps you could not hear above the deafening roar of your heart’s ache. Beth Brown, “Why?” After the Suicide of My Son-A Mother Remembers My Forever Son, Dylan Andrew Brown The beat of my heart shaped by […]

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"Why?" Child Loss Grief Guilt Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide poems of love and loss

A Poem about Losing a Child to Suicide-That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back

That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back Should’ve, Would’ve, Could’ve, If I’d only Come to See, That might I future forward live To see all eternity. That I might know when and where somehow, And here and now then see, To erase the dark and stay […]

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Books and Resources Coping with Loss Coping with suicide Depression and Mental Illness Grief Hope and Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Stigma and Awareness Suicide loss

“When Someone Takes His Own Life”-Depression and Suicide

“When Someone Takes His Own Life” Excerpt from “The Healing of Sorrow” Norman Vincent Peale In many ways, this seems the most tragic form of death. Certainly itcan entail more shock and grief for those who are left behind than anyother. And often the stigma of suicide is what rests most heavily onthose left behind. […]

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"Why?" Addiction, Alcohol, and Substance Use Disorders Coping with Loss Coping with suicide Depression and Mental Illness Guilt Hope and Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide poems of love and loss Reflections after Suicide Loss Stigma and Awareness Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

“When Someone is Too Bruised to Be Touched”-On Suicide, Despair, and Addiction

That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back That All of Love Could Sweep Time Back Should’ve, Would’ve, Could’ve, If I’d only Come to See, That might I future forward live To see all eternity. That I might know when and where somehow, And here and now then see, To erase the dark and stay […]

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Books and Resources Coping with Loss Coping with suicide Family loss Grief Hope and Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Suicide Facts and Statistics Suicide loss Support Groups survivors of suicide loss

How to Survive the Death of a Child By Suicide-Support, Resources, and Hope

The following resources, book lists, narratives from parents who have lost a child to suicide, support groups, and more are meant to be a resource bank. Many have helped me keep on keeping on these past nine years of grieving.

My Forever Son

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Child Loss Coping with Loss Coping with suicide Family loss Healing Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Poems about Loss

From Sorrow to Joy : How Pain Colors Loss

It’s on my refrigerator door–a small, rectangular magnet wedged between a “Choose Hope” magnet and a photograph of my son. The image on the magnet startles. Think Edvard Munch crossed with Vincent Van Gogh. An image depicting a bit of both artists: the sheer starkness of Munch’s scream on a yellow-splashed figure with arms uplifted […]

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Books and Resources Child Loss Coping with suicide Grief Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Suicide Facts and Statistics Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

Where to Go for Support After Suicide Loss

. . .the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported that after a stable period from 2000 to 2007, the rate of suicide among those aged 10 to 24 increased dramatically — by 56 percent — between 2007 and 2017, making suicide the second leading cause of death in this age group, following accidents like […]

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"Why?" Coping with suicide Depression and Mental Illness Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

Is Suicide Really a Choice?

The Stigma of Suicide That we must even ponder: “Is suicide really a choice?” reflects a still pervasive stigma of suicide that somehow, losing a loved one to death by suicide can be controlled–that losing a loved one could have, might have been prevented; that we missed something, a fatal flaw in the way we […]

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Child Loss Coping with Loss Coping with suicide Depression and Mental Illness Family loss Grief Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Songs Suicide loss survivors of suicide loss

A Song and Video about Losing a Child to Suicide: “How Do You Get that Lonely?”

What Happened? Reflections on Dylan’s Birthday In 9 days, it will be my son’s 24th birthday, here, in earth years. In heaven, it will be Dylan’s 4th year birthday. This all seems to me still so surreal, so post-apocalyptic. I can’t find my footing. I am on the wrong road. I’ve gotten lost and somehow, […]

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"Why?" Child Loss Depression and Mental Illness Family loss Grief Heart songs: Poetry from the Heart Parents Who Have Lost a Child to Suicide Poems Poems about Loss Suicide loss

“Bury My Heart”-A Poem about Losing a Child

Bury my heart I’ve come undone Sorting through this life My son left behind. And what I’m seeking I know I’ll never find His touch, his smile— His still living his life. And so instead I sift through A still life dream My heart and life with him Forever it seemed. And oh my son […]