Handwritten Song Lyrics to the song "My Child on Earth Above In Heaven's Care" composed and performed by Beth Brown, My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide, "Songs for Child Loss" Beth Brown
Lyrics, My Child Above on Earth in Heaven’s Care, My Forever Son

A Song About Losing My Son: My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care

ABOUT THIS POST: When I wrote this song, I originally titled it “As I Tuck You In.” The music has the feel and rhythm of a lullaby, and the lyrics and music came from the depths of my sorrow.

As I tuck you in, I lay me down

As I hold you now, I lift my arms

As I fall to sleep, I pray for you,

My child, my love, my heart, I’m with you too

My child, my love, my heart, may God keep and love you

Writing a Lullaby

I lost my 20-year-old son, my only child, to suicide June 25, 2012. He was a sophomore in college. So why a lullaby?

Perhaps because I was at that point in early grief where I collapsed inward with grief, reclusive and withdrawn from the world at large because my world had stopped turning the second I lost my son.

I sat in a darkened room lighted only by a candle, cradling my acoustic guitar, rocking gently back and forth. Almost as if I were holding a baby. My baby. Through all the years. Each year of his life. Each year of his love.

Singing from the Depths of Sorrow

I could barely speak, let alone sing. My words, my voice, more a whisper than a vocal inflection where singing meant inhaling deeply and opening my throat. I could barely breathe, barely manage to speak at all. I wept and quivered in acute grief. And rocked back and forth, back and forth.

And so from the depths of that grief comes hope in a lullaby–hope that I will see Dylan again, faith that God will keep him safe until I get to wherever my son is too. Read a poem in a similar theme about losing a child: If Earth Were Sky and Sky Above.

Listen to another song about losing a child: You’re Free Now Child.


Listen to the Song: My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care

My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care, All Music & Lyrics ©Beth Brown

Lyrics to My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care

My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care

As I tuck you in, I lay me down
As I hold you now, I lift my arms
As I fall asleep, I pray for you
My child, my love, my heart, I’m with you too
My child, my love, my heart, may God keep and love you

And you will be forevermore
Safe from this world and so adored
And God will be your comforter
And I will always thank God for rescuing you
And I will always praise God for loving you too

And so I live my life in memory
Surrendering to God, what now must be
But here on earth I know the angels sing
When I hear your voice I know God’s listening

And I will always be your mother here

And I will speak your name for all to

hear

And God will be with you ’til I get there

My child on earth above in heaven’s care

My child on earth above in heaven’s care.


All Music & Lyrics: ©Beth Brown, My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care, My Forever Son, Songs for Child Loss

Remembering Dylan

Photograph of plastic toy Schroeder and his piano with a bust of Beethoven sitting on it, photographed for My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After Losing My Son to Suicide, "My Child on Earth Above In Heaven's Care"
Schroeder and His Piano, My Forever Son

Remembering Dylan

I remember when Dylan was 8 years old, just beginning piano lessons, and I used to drive him to a local university to take lessons in their music conservatory. We would make the same trip to the university each week for the next 6 years.

I loved hearing Dylan practice. A plastic figurine of Schroeder playing piano donned with a plastic bust of Beethoven from “Charlie Brown,” always sat on top of the upright Schuerman piano. Scott Joplin’s ragtime; Snoopy’s happy dance song; classical pieces; and eventually, jazz (Thelonious Monk) all wafted up from the lower level of our house into the kitchen where I was cooking dinner for the two of us. Wonderful memories. Wonderful years.

Dylan began composing music too, though mostly unbeknownst to me. Those were his teenage years. Years when his friends knew more about him than I did.

My Child on Earth Above in Heaven’s Care, All Music & Lyrics ©Beth Brown, My Forever Son

Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

I write poems about losing my son to suicide. You can read and download three of these poems:

Read more poems about losing a child to suicide here: Find Hope Here: Featuring Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide.


A Book of Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

Bury My Heart: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

Available Now on Amazon Kindle

Bury My Heart: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide

Bury My Heart includes five sections, each with a collection of poems based around the section’s title: A Deep Sorrow; Earth, Sky, Moon, Stars; Why?; In Losing You, I Lost Me Too; and That My Love Be With You Always

Earth, Sky, Moon, Stars: This section of the book “Bury My Heart: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide” explores the vastness of the universe and the natural elements that surround us. Through beautifully crafted poems, it reflects on the interconnectedness of life and the profound sense of loss experienced when a child is lost to suicide.

Why?: The author delves into the complex emotions and thoughts that arise after the tragic loss of a child to suicide. Through poignant poems, they grapple with the haunting question of “why?” – seeking understanding, grappling with guilt, and searching for meaning amidst the devastating experience of losing a loved one to such a tragic act.

In Losing You, I Lost Me Too: Delves deep into the immense personal impact of losing a child to suicide. Through raw and introspective verses, the author explores the profound grief and the psychological journey of losing oneself in the aftermath of such a tragedy. It delves into the feelings of emptiness, self-blame, and the struggle to find a sense of identity after such a profound loss.

That My Love Be With You Always: The final section of “Bury My Heart: Poems About Losing a Child to Suicide” is a heartfelt tribute to the enduring love and connections that transcend death. It embraces the idea of eternal love and seeks solace in the belief that the love for the lost child will always remain. Through tender and poignant verses, the author celebrates the enduring bond and the hope that their love will continue to guide and protect the departed child.



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23 replies on “A Song About Losing My Son: My Child on Earth Above, In Heaven’s Care”

[…] As I tuck you in, I lay me down As I hold you now, I lift my arms As I fall asleep, I pray for you My child, my love, my heart, I’m with you too My child, my love, my heart, May God keep and love you And you will be forevermore Safe from this world and so adored And God will be your comforter And I will always thank God for rescuing you And I will always praise God for loving you too And so I live my life in memory Surrendering to God, what now must be But here on earth I know the angels sing When I hear your voice I know God’s listening And I will always be your mother here And I will speak your name for all to hear And God will be with you ’til I get there My child on earth above in heaven’s care My child on earth above in heaven’s care Beth Brown, "As I Tuck You In," My Forever Son […]

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