
“Bury My Heart”
(for Dylan)
Bury my heart I’ve come undone Sorting through this life My son left behind. And what I’m seeking I know I’ll never find His touch, his smile— His still living his life. And so instead I sift through A still life dream My heart and life with him Forever it seemed. And oh my son I’m still paralyzed In the grief you left me A decade behind. Where canst I go? Whom canst I see? When all I want with you Is forever to be. And how my heart keeps on beating Is a mystery to all For without you beside me I live suspended in time. I live now life backwards My heart beating in time, To the life that we lived When you, child, were mine. Try as I might I can’t seem to live, For my dreams all belonged To your future forward lived. And so where now I goeth And where knoweth I dwell, Once again and all over Life without you is hell. I ache without breathing For to breathe is to die, Once again and all over Without you in my life.
by Beth Brown (for Dylan)
“Bury My Heart” ©Beth Brown, 2021
My Forever Son-Chronicling grief, hope, and healing after losing my son to suicide
Where to Find Support, Resources, and Hope-Losing a Child to Suicide
Perhaps the figure is reeling from a loss so catastrophic that all one can do is scream to sky, to stars, to sun–to wherever forever is, to where forever is out of reach forever again.
Beth Brown, My Forever Son, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss
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Oh the memories, little one-oh the memories

"As I Tuck You In" As I tuck you in, I lay me down As I hold you now, I lift my arms As I fall asleep, I pray for you My child, my love, my heart, I’m with you too My child, my love, my heart, May God keep and love you And you will be forevermore Safe from this world and so adored And God will be your comforter And I will always thank God for rescuing you And I will always praise God for loving you too And so I live my life in memory Surrendering to God, what now must be But here on earth I know the angels sing When I hear your voice I know God’s listening And I will always be your mother here And I will speak your name for all to hear And God will be with you ’til I get there My child on earth above in heaven’s care My child on earth above in heaven’s care Beth Brown, "As I Tuck You In," My Forever Son
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New Book! Losing My Son to Suicide: Poems for Dylan
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A Poem About Losing My Child: Sorrow Buried in Love
A Poem About Losing My Child: Sorrow Buried in Love Sorrow Buried in Love So swish to sway to sweet lullaby, Baby will fall in dark of the night. Rocking cradle to grave turning truth upside down: Parents die first leaving children behind. In a world topsy-turvy that cannot make sense, Sacred trust shines the […]
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“Helping Yourself Heal During the Holiday Season” By Alan Wolfelt The suggestions below offer practical tips for coping with grief during the holidays. Alan D. Wolfelt, the author of these suggestions, writes prolifically about all aspects of grief. He offers practical suggestions for handling grief (including for teens and kids), and he addresses grief in […]

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