“Bury My Heart”
(for Dylan)
Bury my heart I’ve come undone Sorting through this life My son left behind. And what I’m seeking I know I’ll never find His touch, his smile— His still living his life. And so instead I sift through A still life dream My heart and life with him Forever it seemed. And oh my son I’m still paralyzed In the grief you left me 8 years behind. Where canst I go? Whom canst I see? When all I want with you Is forever to be. And how my heart keeps on beating Is a mystery to all For without you beside me I live suspended in time. I live now life backwards My heart beating in time, To the life that we lived When you, child, were mine. Try as I might I can’t seem to live, For my dreams all belonged To your future forward lived. And so where now I goeth And where knoweth I dwell, Once again and all over Life without you is hell. I ache without breathing For to breathe is to die, Once again and all over Without you in my life.
by Beth Brown (for Dylan)
“Bury My Heart” ©Beth Brown, 2021
My Forever Son: Chronicling Grief, Hope, and Healing After the Death of My Son By Suicide
Where to Find Support, Resources, and Hope-Losing a Child to Suicide
Perhaps the figure is reeling from a loss so catastrophic that all one can do is scream to sky, to stars, to sun–to wherever forever is, to where forever is out of reach forever again.
Beth Brown, My Forever Son, From Sorrow to Joy: How Pain Colors Loss
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3 replies on ““Bury My Heart”-A Poem about Losing a Child”
[…] Bury My Heart Bury my heart I’ve come undone Sorting through this life My son left behind. And what I’m seeking I know I’ll never find His touch, his smile— His still living his life. And so instead I sift through A still life dream My heart and life with him Forever it seemed. […]
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